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秋意綿綿，涼風颯颯，樹梢偶爾掉下幾片黃。她慢步於公園大道，有意無意踏在枯葉上。沙沙沙，聽來已然粉身碎骨，看來完好無缺。216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ19QdBVo7GT
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtHSxhsOIwD
「完好？」現在的她問。216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTsLKjXBv6M
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYk2UWJvp4d
「無缺？」曾經的他問。216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhjxW2kCW1Q
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBzII4aVRUy
很多人說他生活美滿。家境富裕，頭腦聰明，五官英氣，身材高大。聞言他總是假笑，笑對方客氣得過份。奈何對方從未察覺他的笑容雖假，情感卻是真實而強烈的：他的確認為對方很過份。他想要的從不是這種生活，可惜每次對此表示厭棄時，總有人批評他不知足。216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNDGHKdnP3I
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKz04Q0e4Te
輕嘆一聲，繼續前行。踏踏踏，沙沙沙，聲聲撕心裂肺。像父母的哭罵，令人痛，也令人愧疚不安。無論他們如何呼天搶地，他終究永遠不會回來。216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡy4sMmqa72U
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHxRCjXzJFE
遷入新居，展開新生。吃力，困難。已然表達得很清楚，對方還是假裝不知該使用哪個稱謂。有人說不介意，有人說很平常，話題和目光卻只停留在胯下之物。216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0C781nyXCu
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtxM8y2kdO0
無處訴說的孤獨日夜縈繞不散。曾發誓永不後悔，曾以為自己是多麼堅毅勇敢，曾相信世界其實不是那麼單一而絕情……216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcqmpZ2se9u
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGwaQDvvLNR
步出公園，拐了幾個街口，來到醫院門前。216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXd2WOvKFmc
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡH967shrcVD
「醫生，早晨。」216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡR58wbl7YVK
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsyFbqurYNm
「早晨。近來身體好嗎？」216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJFYOrT8ryG
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKGBZrzBKNV
「好……不過……」216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡK9AAMsBSqe
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0A96muxJmJ
「不過甚麼？」216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2EZ438NK3H
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡer7Vxe146P
「我想再做手術。」216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6vyy1w7Kif
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9TNu1fo7Xr
「為甚麼？」216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2FB9M8pEhO
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLumfOfCDLt
「不適應現在的生活。」216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNX8hfmeLNL
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwJws4QhkpL
「不適應身體的變化或是有其他困難？」216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3KqsTgWYmH
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡv21uZQR8WX
「是生活上的困難……其實我很滿意現在的身體，我覺得這才是真正的自己！過往的我根本不是我！可惜旁人都不是這麼認為……」216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3lgkIZVyOi
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHZRkdFO2F1
「所以你想要回以前的性別？」216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTGfLAyRWwJ
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdj3rsEZqrv
「不——我是不想要任何性別。」216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKc1843Sp5C
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbtc4HhvJEL
「噢……抱歉我還未能捕捉到你的思路。」216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8UbuUdFaLO
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkaTDLY8Yhl
「這些日子，我遇到的問題大都源於旁人無法定徹底認同我是男或女。如果我沒有特定性別，可以在『男』、『女』、『跨性別』、『無性別』幾個類別之間遊走，可能會更自由！」216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlKoJB1JOu7
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyBvuyCwrzz
「依我看來，你再次做手術之後，將要面對的問題會更多更嚴重。」216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDhJijgxXed
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1XcIcWgjxN
「我理解你的意思，但我還是想要放手一搏——我堅信每次改變都會帶來新的可能、新的希望。」216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡY62HHiby6Q
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1I5JJVqaME
「既然你堅持，我會按程序寫信轉介你去心理輔導部門作專業評估。」216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBvsoforB0c
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxV9CSNIPjg
「謝謝你。」216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡg1uujl7lme
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2tqsBzjPD2
跟醫生多聊一會後，她步出醫院，再次走經公園。216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6eJvxBj9y6
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvubdR1aZEi
秋意綿綿，涼風颯颯，樹梢偶爾掉下幾片黃。她慢步於公園大道，有意無意踏在枯葉上。沙沙沙，聽來已然粉身碎骨，看來完好無缺。216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3x5RuFup2i
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡF521Q4YRoP
「以前未完好。」現在的她說。216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3zWXiKatEt
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwTtxMl0XOx
「將來會無缺。」曾經的他說。216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLKTVrJfdtF
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwn9Cv615LM
她笑了，笑自己傻，笑自己依然沉浸在幻想世界當中，相信自己的人生將來一定會變得完好無缺。216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ05meZVrvkM
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZ30vFENH1F
明知無人能斷言明天一定會更好。216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBaJ2imomaX
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ32awptyz41
奈何人總需要一個努力的原因、一個繼續活下去的原因。216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIWyT2FFpY1
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ49M89ohCCx
那個原因名為「希望」。216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXmYpZXq1IF
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡV2NxMlx78l
「我定要繼續努力。」現在的她說。216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡx6uyumYYwD
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4oWrsJJoUX
「好好活下去吧。」曾經的他說。216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtkfq8Ep4kK
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRFkj8QPZoP
秋意綿綿，涼風颯颯，樹梢偶爾掉下幾片黃。216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7PzqjA5K23
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfjatxYw2zb
她慢步於公園大道，放眼欣賞沿路風景，不再留意地上的枯葉。
註：此篇另收錄於短篇小說合集《雜念集》
ns216.73.216.8da2
