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秋意綿綿，涼風颯颯，樹梢偶爾掉下幾片黃。她慢步於公園大道，有意無意踏在枯葉上。沙沙沙，聽來已然粉身碎骨，看來完好無缺。215Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡC0PbifrApR
215Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡi7eLoA6pcO
「完好？」現在的她問。215Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQ38PHf55bb
215Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJEIzPllOqx
「無缺？」曾經的他問。215Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdJllOa95bf
215Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡehIsjGnE0z
很多人說他生活美滿。家境富裕，頭腦聰明，五官英氣，身材高大。聞言他總是假笑，笑對方客氣得過份。奈何對方從未察覺他的笑容雖假，情感卻是真實而強烈的：他的確認為對方很過份。他想要的從不是這種生活，可惜每次對此表示厭棄時，總有人批評他不知足。215Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDMENHN1ijF
215Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhK5FJ0lHRY
輕嘆一聲，繼續前行。踏踏踏，沙沙沙，聲聲撕心裂肺。像父母的哭罵，令人痛，也令人愧疚不安。無論他們如何呼天搶地，他終究永遠不會回來。215Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡC1WuqPqGqB
215Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBpCHEL2SvE
遷入新居，展開新生。吃力，困難。已然表達得很清楚，對方還是假裝不知該使用哪個稱謂。有人說不介意，有人說很平常，話題和目光卻只停留在胯下之物。215Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKfXsYLjrLR
215Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxb9At3ISxl
無處訴說的孤獨日夜縈繞不散。曾發誓永不後悔，曾以為自己是多麼堅毅勇敢，曾相信世界其實不是那麼單一而絕情……215Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbxmQlKlUue
215Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxn2QbjorHy
步出公園，拐了幾個街口，來到醫院門前。215Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIB2leS4JHu
215Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzVAk3ETuZj
「醫生，早晨。」215Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDFZTvXyyuy
215Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjObqqwrbsb
「早晨。近來身體好嗎？」215Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡb3reFtVzNB
215Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrebN95nEqT
「好……不過……」215Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoldW1KKLnx
215Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ04Q7qXW4ox
「不過甚麼？」215Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNGTr097yh5
215Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzdXokdX4zU
「我想再做手術。」215Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyHiQ2Ik4cb
215Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeR9PmWPdXX
「為甚麼？」215Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡD7JU5TIFkC
215Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdv62CAaKh1
「不適應現在的生活。」215Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHsqXz2YcdI
215Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDnpkSINfFB
「不適應身體的變化或是有其他困難？」215Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡV4TGE9ssqV
215Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡs5sUJi4gts
「是生活上的困難……其實我很滿意現在的身體，我覺得這才是真正的自己！過往的我根本不是我！可惜旁人都不是這麼認為……」215Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5enM9oqTdV
215Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiMrmoGgXDk
「所以你想要回以前的性別？」215Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡO28Sh9SaBr
215Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzin0PUdJ3W
「不——我是不想要任何性別。」215Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡs83qbjAZFn
215Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0JWR9hgKzO
「噢……抱歉我還未能捕捉到你的思路。」215Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcjkH1AXtem
215Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAxyblNFDjg
「這些日子，我遇到的問題大都源於旁人無法定徹底認同我是男或女。如果我沒有特定性別，可以在『男』、『女』、『跨性別』、『無性別』幾個類別之間遊走，可能會更自由！」215Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7G5lzDDnAP
215Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡl1PiehPjrd
「依我看來，你再次做手術之後，將要面對的問題會更多更嚴重。」215Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5zna4SL3cZ
215Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDCfocgBjNd
「我理解你的意思，但我還是想要放手一搏——我堅信每次改變都會帶來新的可能、新的希望。」215Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJ4wjVKIbty
215Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNEgb0uORyu
「既然你堅持，我會按程序寫信轉介你去心理輔導部門作專業評估。」215Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSh7zODvXx0
215Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡH5D58cFXuD
「謝謝你。」215Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDzWjoJbGwp
215Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡALBb8SHlVl
跟醫生多聊一會後，她步出醫院，再次走經公園。215Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5vKCPYpxG2
215Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡy7635z5OpO
秋意綿綿，涼風颯颯，樹梢偶爾掉下幾片黃。她慢步於公園大道，有意無意踏在枯葉上。沙沙沙，聽來已然粉身碎骨，看來完好無缺。215Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ39PGJiNaww
215Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwmEAtelDbQ
「以前未完好。」現在的她說。215Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXIZunTx6dk
215Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡy2vesBRCBI
「將來會無缺。」曾經的他說。215Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfYkpRZBFv2
215Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBz4RI4zuuv
她笑了，笑自己傻，笑自己依然沉浸在幻想世界當中，相信自己的人生將來一定會變得完好無缺。215Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpdMM0NrJHf
215Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmvy0TUxOn1
明知無人能斷言明天一定會更好。215Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuuxkpwc89g
215Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsuN9G47zCQ
奈何人總需要一個努力的原因、一個繼續活下去的原因。215Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiYHnyCpRKb
215Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeYNGXhKixy
那個原因名為「希望」。215Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡe8vd1AYFl4
215Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4RPyH3o8un
「我定要繼續努力。」現在的她說。215Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLReAjhisfJ
215Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQ0PLFT1UH8
「好好活下去吧。」曾經的他說。215Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ65x3gz7xWx
215Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfoDXbQ8Hht
秋意綿綿，涼風颯颯，樹梢偶爾掉下幾片黃。215Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡU88I25YXGq
215Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNf2QImC7Mr
她慢步於公園大道，放眼欣賞沿路風景，不再留意地上的枯葉。
註：此篇另收錄於短篇小說合集《雜念集》
ns216.73.216.8da2
