You know that moment when the night’s too quiet…217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCAPI9VISsp
and your phone screen glows a little brighter than usual?
That was me.
Lying on my bed, earphones in but no music playing,217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtcHPSyeLYP
just the hum of the fan — louder than usual tonight —217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBEiyHClNKQ
and her last message on the screen.
It wasn’t anything romantic.217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡz74bSv6BNG
Not a heart, not a wink, not even a punctuation mark that hinted at something.217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVdqxYqWWEZ
Just words. Casual, comfortable. But from her.
And I just stared at them, like they were the final piece of a puzzle I wasn’t supposed to complete.
We were talking.217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkH0iVrbzkr
Really talking.217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCZTbq4hjQU
No layers, no sarcasm, no anime metaphors to hide behind…
But it felt real.217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMPIxBXPETk
The kind of real that makes you nervous — not because something’s wrong,217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwrvNgrKZvI
but because it’s too good. Too close.
And I began to wonder:
How much can you talk to someone before you say something you shouldn’t?
Before a joke turns into a confession,217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQZmRWbE6bJ
a casual text becomes a late-night heart spill,217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6kpbmFdLA4
and silence feels heavier than words?
How much longer can we keep it buried?
I could feel it bubbling up.
The things I wasn’t supposed to say.
Like,217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡttLH5wsTDh
"I’ve been trying to get your attention since that first day."217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfzQRP07kxO
Or217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfneDBhSLpN
"When you walk into a room, I pretend I didn’t see you first, but I always do."
Or the most dangerous of them all:217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWJn4ub5w2u
"You called me 'bro' earlier... did you mean that like 'brother,' or more like... awkward placeholder for someone you don’t know how to place yet?"
But I didn’t send any of that.217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9WuqRabOh2
Instead, I did what most cowards do when their heart starts to overthink:217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5ROnyY0aAV
I typed.217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbrLv0PtxGt
Deleted.217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgmr8yOK6Nl
Typed again.217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQutRQWgow2
Deleted.217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOvvqoXhpNL
Typed again.217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbQ5GASEFfF
Deleted.217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHuKd8OoXK5
Typed again.217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmp3PujqtnZ
Paused.
And somewhere between all that hesitation, I asked myself something even worse:
If I truly like someone… can I ask them to like me back?
And isn't that just the most foolish question in the world?
What gives me the right to expect love just because I give it?217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1mA6HcdVME
Does loving someone mean they owe me something?217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjqzHz59lMs
A reply? A smile? A place in their life?
No, right?
Because love… love’s not a job interview.217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHWm5nyag0M
You don’t apply and wait for a callback.217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVXmG1mady4
There’s no resume, no credentials, no guaranteed outcome.
You just feel.217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoi7azqT2Km
And hope.
But here’s the brutal truth:217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡd7ZiSkF4Wx
Hope is not a strategy.
I began to spiral.217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXqHMb2NCwR
Thinking about arranged marriages, random unions born out of astrology and surnames.217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnSie0qCu8e
People saying "yes" to strangers in mandaps because their families believed it was enough.217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqokSTStA0J
And somehow, somehow, love blooms there too.
Is it just the absence of fear?217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5JuZkIAKqo
Is it a choice? A decision made over and over again, like brushing your teeth or choosing peace over pride?
Or is it just a lucky accident?
So then what is love?
Love.
Four letters. Infinite confusion.
We throw it around so casually—217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJBcFP1LUF8
“I love pizza.”217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTms69Ijesd
“I love that show.”217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUNApndQKTD
“I love her.”
when the night’s too quiet and your heart's louder than it should be,217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWsoIWWYaUY
you start to ask…
What even is love?
Is it the late-night texts that make you smile like an idiot?217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0xugLoxc2E
Or the effort to learn C just to help someone who might not even know your name?217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7CKkRUmcgb
Is it being seen, truly seen—not for how smart or funny or helpful you are—but for just being you?
Because I wasn’t sure anymore.
If love means trying to be enough for someone... is that love?217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeabWu0xS3W
If love means hiding your feelings just to stay close... is that love?217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2A8lvDX2Qm
If love never gets returned, was it ever real?
Or maybe love isn’t about return policies at all.217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNLHg6FG5pY
Maybe love is giving without expecting.217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzne0T6mGEu
Hoping without demanding.217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRAMGtm5fzs
Staying, even if the door never opens.
And if it’s the latter — if love is just dumb luck —217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3Act52vVY4
then what does that make me?
A gambler?217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLWDaJg9Qp5
A poet with no ink?217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJBHmkhxQit
A fool tossing feelings into a wishing well that’s been dry for years?
All I know is this:
Love, the real kind, the scary kind — it doesn’t demand.217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡy7kWYCmrW4
It doesn’t ask for returns.217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAkGRxXUaOj
It just… is.
Like the moon.217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeDahjAz2iX
Distant. Cold sometimes.217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEDiIeOY4GW
But still shining. Still pulling tides.
So I made a decision.
One I thought I’d regret.217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡasbeZ90Sd2
One that felt like surrender.217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSuLXKv4J0E
But maybe it was the only honest thing left.
I typed:217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡz3kyWH5wRG
"Let’s be friends."
And I meant it.217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡN0fgIRXbcc
Not because I wanted to.217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhgLNrewDGd
But because I had to.
Because I know — deep down — even if I poured out every syllable of my soul,217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxrcJRPD2b4
let the poet in me die trying,217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡP1A507muLP
the answer would still be silence, or worse… pity.217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡszhVy2xKdf
time won't change the answer,217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡo1OSya26gC
in this moment or in the future.
And I don’t want pity.217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLTO2jfR8vZ
I want her to smile when she sees my name.217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2TtbiG50ch
Even if it’s only ever as a friend.
So yeah, laugh all you want.
But that was my truth:217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6c2sD4ZkaL
Maybe I’ll never be someone important in her life.217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡL1pV832d9D
But I can be someone good.217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIeCgKAFIo9
Steady. Loyal. Low-maintenance. Someone she doesn’t have to second guess.
Hopeless romantic?
Guilty.
But hopeless doesn’t mean worthless.
So when she replied:217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjHFvSEojcw
"Sure, of course."217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKpwDgcdfTb
I smiled.
Because that’s more than most people get.217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKe8oXLriEt
And sometimes, friendship is the love story that doesn’t get written into poetry —217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡI4Coh7KkaG
but it still matters.
The night grew older.217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlHmLwav1U7
The conversation faded into a simple:217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3KYPTS550w
“Goodnight.”
And I lay there.217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTFSQJhURLt
Phone resting like a heartbeat on my chest.217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡimyvOtMS9V
Ceiling fan humming.217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6rTNYeCIvC
Eyes open.217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJJhUdI89n9
Thoughts louder than sleep.
But slowly, everything softened.
The fan blurred into background.217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBKWMwyEGDV
The silence turned into a lullaby.217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5RpohawTJG
And Nova... drifted.
Not into a dream of her,217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMiEvn3wULA
not even of love,217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrkgItTGnD8
but something stranger.
He stood at the edge of a nameless rooftop, under a starless sky.217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLtpFdTfre4
No moon. No wind.217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡD75Pfcbfkn
Just an ocean of lights flickering below — like forgotten wishes.
A voice — his own, but older — whispered beside him:217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlofdZCGEn3
“Do you think love makes you whole?217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIMQBpF095O
Or does it just reveal the parts you’ve been missing?”
Nova didn’t answer.217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPj5yqHhUw0
He couldn’t.
Because in that dream,217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡU8x1xHFeSj
he wasn’t searching for love anymore.
He was searching for something deeper.217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxgjYLjl04E
A reason.217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxfx4mlXqIt
A pause in the chaos that made it all make sense.
But life doesn’t hand you clarity like that.
Sometimes it just gives you217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡW0Tou1RfRU
a feeling.217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGoasfiiQQF
A choice.217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVAZKCjw1XR
And the hope that in some parallel version of now,217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcSN1MhBza0
you say the thing you never said —
and someone stays.
But in this world, in this moment?
Nova slept.
A little sad.217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡf2kvrPQGAm
A little wiser.
And somewhere between the real and the not-quite-real,217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyUIQSXfBuS
he whispered one last thing to the darkness:
“If love is a question no one knows how to answer...217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkXhCEWkBIP
maybe I’ll spend my life learning how to ask it better.”
Then darkness.
And for once...217Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjwkaa7JrSQ
peace.
