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People Who Like This
#6

《HR勇者记忆全解锁后，发现我们曾是……酒友？！》

翎淵 翎淵
Apr 30, 2025 7 3 Mins Read
x
No Plagiarism!xI44bx5wZdh4lgOJeCXOposted on PＥNAＮＡ

 

11Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMCeRdoy1bq

 【1】“300日元买我的前世？抢劫啊！”  

星野晴的圣剑悬浮在空中，剑尖指着她的太阳穴，屏幕闪烁：  

『记忆封锁解除费用：300日元（含税）』  

『※警告：可能包含“宿敌醉酒黑历史”※』  

11Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjIqHkeopu7

我还在犹豫，使魔已经跳上剑柄狂踩“确认支付”按钮：「陛下！这比地狱赌场的筹码便宜多了！」  

11Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKxMyK31QD8

——叮！  

11Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhwpxdBnuDm

圣剑突然爆出刺目金光，星野晴的瞳孔剧烈收缩，她颤抖着捂住头，记忆如潮水般涌来——  

11Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡT7exmNUYDm

 【2】三百年前，我们居然在战争中途……喝酒？  

记忆碎片1：  

血月下的战场，年轻的勇者（星野晴前世）和魔王（我）坐在尸横遍野的荒野中，中间摆着一桶“地狱岩浆酒”。  

「喂，魔王，」勇者醉醺醺地指着我的王冠，「你这玩意……在人类界叫‘加班费’吧？」  

「胡说什么！这是魔王尊严的象征！」  

「尊严个屁啊！你部下刚才跟我说……你王座下面藏着《人类界温泉旅行计划》！」  

11Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYQ6Zrh9k7a

记忆碎片2：  

勇者把圣剑插在土里当晾衣架，挂着她的内衣（绣着“女神赐福”字样），而我用黑暗魔法……帮她烘干。  

「下次决战定在周一吧，」她打着酒嗝，「周日……我要睡懒觉。」  

11Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeEItiUO4xd

 【3】“女神系统”篡改记忆的真相  

现实中的星野晴突然抓住我的领带，金瞳燃起怒火：「我想起来了……根本没有什么“宿敌决战”！」  

11Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnsz2UDxmRt

当年那场“最终圣战”，其实是女神强行洗脑她来杀我！  

因为我和勇者偷偷签订的《停战协议》里写着：  

“拒绝996，魔界人界共同抵制神明压榨”  

11Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqMGk3xZF4P

「所以……我们曾是反女神联盟？！」我震惊。  

「不止，」她耳尖发红，「你答应过……等和平后请我去魔界吃“地狱火锅”。」  

11Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYmXl3EE9Rh

（使魔突然插嘴：「陛下！这就是您坚持学做火锅三百年的原因？！」）  

11Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgVJ2hWVM47

 【4】当HR系统检测到“员工反叛”  

天花板突然裂开，“女神系统”的机械音回荡：  

『检测到NO.1员工记忆异常，启动“忠诚度格式化”程序』  

11Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNOny3HC98K

星野晴的西装突然变成纯白铠甲，但眼里挣扎着最后一丝清醒：「路德维希……用那招……！」  

我立刻会意，掏出使魔偷偷准备的“恶魔Uber终极武器”——  

11Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFRnBdaunae

一份加了致死量辣椒的“记忆恢复外卖”！  

11Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwTcaR1Wz65

「这是……？」  

「当年你说“辣到流泪才能记住重要的事”！」我掰开她的嘴灌进去，「给我醒过来啊……晴！」  

11Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnDwCszlhWE

 【5】付费断章：勇者与魔王的“转世再就业协议”  

她咳出金色数据流，铠甲片片剥落，露出里面的……天界株式会社制服。  

11Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1lUGX2vLKm

「听着，」她喘着气抓住我的手，「系统真正的核心在……社长办公室的咖啡机里……」  

11Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpTMetoqmWk

突然，她的手机自动弹出新通知：  

『您已被降职为“实习员工”，请立即归还圣剑。』  

11Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrCkUXwjrK9

而我的使魔同步收到恶魔Uber订单：  

『新任务：外送“弑神特饮”至社长室  

报酬：勇者前世全部记忆（含温泉旅行照片）  

※需预付500日元※』  

11Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡU6oPMsqSyI

3.15.204.106

ns3.15.204.106da2
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魔王退休后跑去当社畜了
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Table of Contents
#0 Intro
#1 《被裁员后，我决定用诅咒让上司天天腹泻》
#2 《在茶水间召唤使魔后，它帮我做了Excel》
#3 《当HR掏出圣剑裁员的瞬间，我喊出了前世医保密码》
#4 《加入魔王工会后，我的考勤表变成了恶魔契约》
#5 《我的使魔偷偷注册了“恶魔Uber”，接单圣水外送》
#6 《HR勇者记忆全解锁后，发现我们曾是……酒友？！》
#7 《被迫和HR勇者“商务合宿”后，魔王的SAN值归零了》  
#8 《当“女神黑料包”解压后，全公司都SAN值崩坏了》
#9 《当女神兔耳照流出后，三界开始集体罢工》
#10 《当地狱推行955工作制后，魔王被骂“工贼”了》
#11 《当使魔发行“冥币NFT”后，三界经济崩溃了》
#12 《当女神在便利店打工后，她终于理解了人间疾苦》
#13 《当三界战争变成“线上PK”后，没人想上班了》  
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