《請跟我交往！拜託啦！》 - 第一章體育課！

大家好，我叫柳困，今年十七歲，是一個看似普通的正常高中生。

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不過，我卻擁有一個不尋常的秘密──我仍然保有前世的記憶。461Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyTlp64km5B
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不對，不只前世……就連前前世、前前前世、前前前前世都還記憶猶新。461Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKouFNdBBPN
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問我為什麼？461Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡodH8QglXYE
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原因很簡單。461Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPYJczGq1Yq
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因為我是個單身狗。461Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzRseBAcgjU
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在死後的世界，也就是「魂界」，神曾經立下一個規定：要談過戀愛，才能在轉生前消除前世的記憶。461Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtp4wxmmrNH
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「沒談過戀愛怎麼能算是活過啊？」那一天，神斜坐在王座上，興高采烈地宣布，「從今天開始，到死前還沒談過戀愛的，一律不准清除自己的記憶！」461Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLrDf1AXszW
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從那之後，世間開始不時出現保留著前世記憶的神童，他們也都成功地在重生後談了場轟轟烈烈的戀愛，並在死後轉生前順利清除了自己的記憶。461Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1SegEr5YkG
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除了我以外。

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「喂，我說你啊，」在再次轉生到人間，成為柳困之前，神把我拉到魂界的角落，用責備但幸災樂禍的語氣對我說，「你要加油欸，你已經連續單身了十輩子了，學弟妹全都畢業了，就只剩你一個人還卡在這裡，不覺得羞恥嗎？」461Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYo9BhaBGMZ
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「少囉唆！」我惱怒道，「妳也不想想到底是誰的問題！」461Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvIcFhh2GiH
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「哎呀哎呀，現在是怪我囉？」神擺出無辜的表情。461Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMcyW0yjFDH
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「這輩子！我這輩子一定會脫單的！」461Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIDecvy9oL6
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「你上次也是這麼說。」461Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡANSiiIHPop
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「閉嘴！才沒有！」我面紅耳赤，不等祂說完就直接跳進轉生之門。461Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJjkjJJoJkE
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在那之後的十六年後，我進入高中，開始體驗人生中的第十一次青春期。我準備好要應付戀愛這場激烈的戰爭，也希望自己能在這一次的青春期成功脫魯。461Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8Rk4ooopzQ
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這個想法，只持續到進入教室的那一刻，遇見「她」為止。461Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2rfhkJiXFi
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「柳困！該起床了啊！」一陣衝擊襲向趴在桌上的我，我一個重心不穩隨著椅子整個人倒在教室冰涼的地板上。461Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyilc608Bdi
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「妳搞什麼啊！」我抱怨，起身拍掉制服上沾到的灰塵，「現在不是還在午休時間嗎？」461Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnjHJPJng89
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「才不是，這節是外堂課欸。」說話的是一位臉頰微微泛紅的女學生。她的右腳舉著，明顯就是剛把我踹下椅子的樣子。461Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpWfYB4c1vH
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我默默的翻白眼，但是沒有回嘴，避免招來一頓拳頭。461Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcjxLtsjYoF
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我轉頭看了看四周，同學們都走光了，只剩下空蕩的桌椅。461Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJ7miK6nfQB
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「走囉，體育課。」女學生紅著臉帶頭走出教室，我則跟在她後面。461Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBAvcWlC6ZX
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什麼？你說她看起來就像是對我有意思，問我為什麼不跟她交往就好了？461Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ27lQw1U6A0
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我們再次回到剛剛的話題。461Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiyV6f4RGkx
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在高一時，我遇見了「她」。461Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHoj8t8mGqR
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她有著一頭紫色的長直髮，看到人總是臉頰泛紅，一副害羞的表情，還擁有一個美麗的名字：賴妍。461Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡanFKADRtjp
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剛開始，全班的男學生都急著對賴妍獻殷勤，不過到了下學期的時候對她告白的人卻只剩下其他班的學生。461Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgEZ4fLtjKt
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原因很單純：因為這個人很恐怖。461Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXuubA3AOq1
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恐怖到甚至被取了「瘋狗」這個外號。461Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6y6FkqGepP
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至於一天到晚臉頰泛紅的原因也不是因為「為了要操控他人」這種複雜的理由，而是因為「酒精」。461Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1c0VZMPDs6
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賴妍是我在到目前為止的十一個人生裡面，見過唯一一個可以在午餐時間拿整瓶五十度烈酒配完白飯的女人。461Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCV5qiRtmct
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永遠沒人知道她喝醉之後下一件會做出什麼超乎常理的事。461Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2toWeAgI9l
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我們兩人快步走到操場，看見體育老師早就已經帶完操，放同學去打球了，所以我直接略過暖身，自己抓了一顆地上的籃球，走到籃球場練習投籃。461Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJsXcIykJNW
461Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7eDq91QBZu

「同學！」我投進第三球時，體育老師吹起哨子，「請不要在操場喝小米酒！」461Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwVijx8hXgY
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我馬上轉頭，看見一旁換好體育服的賴妍把一隻腳放在長椅上，仰起頭抓著酒瓶猛灌。461Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjLDGa0Ner7

如果把背景換成公園，那她看起來就像一個普通的公園醉漢。461Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyiXdHXGym8
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但是這裡是學校啊！

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「可是老師，我在暖身欸。」賴妍把酒一口氣喝完然後發出「噗哈」的聲音，接著用手背豪氣的抹抹嘴，最後啐了一口痰在操場外的草皮上。461Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVDrzQQWf4c
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這不是完全就是公園裡的醉漢嗎！461Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ55Tw7sd9Pt
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「那邊那位同學！」體育老師又朝另一邊大喊，「請不要在體育課投擲燃燒瓶！」461Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlkVGIDIDDD
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「可是老師，我在暖身耶。」手裡握著燃燒瓶正準備要丟的男同學停下動作。461Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoa3bkIbxrL
461Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVBxODeK1Ge

這貨的名字叫簡澄，不知為何，他對燃燒瓶有著近乎癡狂的異常執著，不論是何種問題、處境都會想使用燃燒瓶來解決。461Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoq4MwNXFFj
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對他來說，世界上不存在他的燃燒瓶解決不了的事物。461Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwcIS62guXq
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有時候問題甚至還真的能夠解決，不過這只讓他變本加厲。461Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJD7SGudb9g
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像是現在。461Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ60SyEK6DQL
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你根本是在幫其他同學暖身吧！461Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeBVk84GVvf
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你旁邊的女同學已經快要哭出來了啊！461Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbykkwPHoQb
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體育老師也快來阻止一下他吧！461Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡw3n1XFW7k2
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「那暖身完記得收起來喔。」體育老師又繼續回頭看他的閣樓雜誌。461Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡb1nby0l0pr
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你這體育老師也太淡定了吧！461Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCBIh8o7i8W
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至少先給我把閣樓雜誌收起來啊！461Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4sF3ZGkg21
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在簡澄下手之前，另一位男同學抓住了他的手腕。461Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡK5swfkbdP5
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「住手吧，簡澄boy，這樣不cool喔。」461Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQb54KQmtBD

男同學一手抓住簡澄，一手按在自己的臉上。461Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡR1NxQuq1iq
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「可惡，最麻煩的傢伙出現了…」簡澄低聲抱怨。461Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaVFte7Qq2G
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「你的惡行，就由我冥界的魔之眷屬 · 暗爪的歐威爾，依你的行為施以制ㄘㄞ────」461Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrmkOwZWDyQ
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「三岐，你的錢包掉了。」我走過去，撿起掉在暗爪的歐威爾身旁的錢包。461Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEJAWsASSHb
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「……我不是三岐，我是鋼爪的歐威爾。」461Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyxTRllFP92
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「你剛剛說暗爪。」461Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxArQnd8Kez
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「不，柳困boy，我很清楚我是誰，」他一手放在胸前，一手放在身後，雙腳交叉向我行禮。

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「我，是冥界的邪王 · 鋼爪的麥歐爾，出自於冥界的望族，進入人間是為了要拯救我的妹妹，也就是冥界的公主，鎖鏈的康妮。」461Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyV5KFOtc4L
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「你本來說歐威爾。」461Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡn4SzGfOU3H
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「那、那是一時口誤……」461Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5XvEiJtscy
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「你，」我嚴肅的對著他說，「根本不知道自己是誰對吧？」461Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaLH08O0f1D
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「不…我不……」他按著額頭，露出痛苦的神色，在地上打滾。「不行……！『魂』…滾出我的腦海啊啊啊啊啊啊啊！！」461Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZm66hTBazU
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「邪王好弱。」我發牢騷。話說回來，魂界也沒有邪王這種東西就是了。461Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡte0rcvGvm3
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「這個給你，振作起來吧，」簡澄把手中的燃燒瓶遞給他，為他加油打氣，「你可沒有這麼容易倒下！因為……461Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6gkLrJ0sqa
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「因為你可是……我的宿敵啊。」461Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2iiTHA62YY
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簡澄露出了豪氣的笑容，把手伸向在地上的三岐。461Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwVDY5efoNW
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三岐擦乾淚水，回握住簡澄的手，正準備從地上爬起的時候，「有沒有人～看到我的～瓶～～～～子～～～～～～～～～」被喝的爛醉的賴妍一腳踩在後腦。461Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡohfNtQnYOq
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「你不是說只要暖身嗎！」「被」趴在地上的三岐吐槽。461Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHAnc3irQhN
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「喔呀…？」賴妍往下一看，「早安啊三岐同學～在那裡玩會弄髒身體喔？」461Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcC1pxmKqKw
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「妳先從我身上下來啊！」三岐掙扎。461Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhRjRsfGRdl
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「喔喔喔喔！好像在玩衝浪喔！」賴妍努力維持平衡。461Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4lSBNSTobG
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「妳這是……在噗喔小看我身為暗印者的力量嗎……？」三岐說到一半還吃到土。461Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡf9onD2ntMV
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「衝浪了喔喔喔喔喔！」賴妍開心的大笑。461Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3OysC0bs5G
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她根本就沒在聽啊！461Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvzxSYO6q0x
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「同學！」體育老師從看雜誌的姿勢抬頭，

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「不要霸凌有精神障礙的同學好嗎！」461Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEmeu4cxPDK
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他只是中二病還沒好而已啊！為什麼變成精神障礙了！461Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOST9yBmMxq
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「可是老師你看三岐，」在賴妍腳下的三岐已經整張臉埋在土裡了，「他玩的很開心耶。」461Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5hPJdOg98B
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「唔唔唔唔唔唔唔唔！」三岐口齒不清的哀嚎。461Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCmkSWKr0lD
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「注意不要讓同學受傷喔。」體育老師繼續看閣樓雜誌。461Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTcb6sw4rDN
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這已經不是受傷的問題了吧！461Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJ7yHdjh1jg
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所以說給我把雜誌收起來啊！461Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwSwIxdjvFv
461Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNoJ6m6Z9dw

「夠唔喔了吧！」臉不斷砸向地板的三岐好不容易擠出一句話。461Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡl0BRW1FlWP
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「…………」賴妍臉一僵，慢慢低頭，看著她腳底下不斷扭動的三岐。461Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpUQrEI4rDU
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「我、我的衝浪板會說話…好噁心喔……」461Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWtAewCPJ9u
461Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡH956URp9ni

她眼眶泛紅，吸了一次鼻子。461Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlGCn01m4VN
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兩次。461Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡa0pzCgHXkV
461Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHo3qIjkAI7

「嗚嗚………………」賴妍開始不顧一切地大哭。461Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2K1LP3LCDm
461Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzuCzGUnuD3

「三岐同學真壞。」

461Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGa0eIwMzz3

「好糟糕喔。」

461Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUrmh9eyA9c

「竟然害奇怪的東西哭了。」旁邊圍觀的同學們開始交頭接耳。461Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡImTPD8MkF1
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說別人是奇怪的東西也太過份了吧！461Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡT2K2h74Rq7
461Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqfS1eWE6Yn

「所以現在是我的問題囉！」三岐好不容易從嚎啕大哭的賴妍腳下逃開。461Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7K4FghV6iT
461Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhFqN3HiUxT

「喂！誰來安慰她一下啊！」一位男同學慌張的大喊。461Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmibzcYos7g
461Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQpedTHMA0F

「我能讓他冷靜一下。」簡澄拿出燃燒瓶。461Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ23LGdEf4Fx
461Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7LglV7yfLk

「你只是要讓她熱起來吧！」461Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9kI9dF56zJ
461Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0EwrG2bGQv

「被吾封印的眷屬呦，僅從吾之召喚───」三岐振振有詞。461Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFo9v8LUdq0
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「你是要安慰她還是收了她啊啊！」461Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9S80J97qkb
461Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvMYSaXjr97

「收了她。」三岐露出一副理所當然的表情。461Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTlKqwnmfku
461Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEFgT8wwD6o

「你們根本是來亂的吧！」你們別亂搞，我等等還要收尾啊！461Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlDtsscMQH9
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「年輕人們。」不知道何時走到我們旁邊的體育老師開口了，「就憑你們是無法解決這種毀滅性天災的。」461Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBe2X5TjXD5
461Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3ArWNz0uH5

「為什麼又從奇怪的東西變成毀滅性天災！」461Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlADjapwdJ2
461Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFKHv1BQFUK

「因為奇怪的東西放久了本來就會變成毀滅性天災。」461Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfAqXcVRLcD
461Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2PlJpIyq7U

我不是在問這個啊啊啊啊啊！461Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6ZPW6KUNDn
461Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYtQqJRCrdX

老師又開口說：「現在，我就讓你們看看，真正的『大人的辦法』。」461Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6PLNItIgNp
461Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXE7XN0qL9s

「『大人的辦法』……」簡澄看著老師嚴肅的臉，吞了口口水。461Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqZreXDm58R
461Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6GxT3eMg3M

「賴妍同學。」他走到賴妍面前。賴妍因為震驚而暫時忘記了哭泣。461Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdXYjFISo9K
461Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ48rhH5E37V

話說我們的體育老師是一位看上去年過四十的大叔，比班上所有除了我以外的同學都還要早經歷了傳說中的青春期，再加上已經在這所高中任職了十年以上，所以應該也有足夠的能力與經驗能解決這種事ㄑ────461Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3fiPQNBmZ8
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「你看，這是丁丁。」他脫下褲子。461Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKAliGIOGT4
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    是真正意義上的『讓你們看看』啊啊啊啊啊啊啊！461Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLcIv6nmiF1
461Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGi2loxQhJH
461Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5v1iJLm01J
  當日結果：461Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnJ8JPl5x69

賴妍平安無事（哭累了被女同學背回教室）。461Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPiixdIuwma
簡澄打電話報警，體育老師於上課中被警察抓走，兩人前往警局做筆錄。461Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPURTMbc5PL
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三岐臉部異常腫脹，被帶去了醫務室。461Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkXx5d6tEMP
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其他同學（包括柳困）於下一節正常上課。461Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUYgiiy2PSr
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柳困依然單身。

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第一章 體育課！

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第一章體育課！