《請跟我交往！拜託啦！》 - 第一章體育課！

大家好，我叫柳困，今年十七歲，是一個看似普通的正常高中生。

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不過，我卻擁有一個不尋常的秘密──我仍然保有前世的記憶。417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡES1noncRwv
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不對，不只前世……就連前前世、前前前世、前前前前世都還記憶猶新。417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKLWzk4GFMc
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問我為什麼？417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡE565ekROvL
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原因很簡單。417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡw9vm1Q5UmL
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因為我是個單身狗。417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCWo4rnooQP
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在死後的世界，也就是「魂界」，神曾經立下一個規定：要談過戀愛，才能在轉生前消除前世的記憶。417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡt8jeP7xsih
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「沒談過戀愛怎麼能算是活過啊？」那一天，神斜坐在王座上，興高采烈地宣布，「從今天開始，到死前還沒談過戀愛的，一律不准清除自己的記憶！」417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcxfijqIJhp
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從那之後，世間開始不時出現保留著前世記憶的神童，他們也都成功地在重生後談了場轟轟烈烈的戀愛，並在死後轉生前順利清除了自己的記憶。417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡx1e2hbURL8
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除了我以外。

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「喂，我說你啊，」在再次轉生到人間，成為柳困之前，神把我拉到魂界的角落，用責備但幸災樂禍的語氣對我說，「你要加油欸，你已經連續單身了十輩子了，學弟妹全都畢業了，就只剩你一個人還卡在這裡，不覺得羞恥嗎？」417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlB8ZmSollX
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「少囉唆！」我惱怒道，「妳也不想想到底是誰的問題！」417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoevvesoF5h
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「哎呀哎呀，現在是怪我囉？」神擺出無辜的表情。417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡp44O8dxh3D
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「這輩子！我這輩子一定會脫單的！」417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwvDSbXyJSa
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「你上次也是這麼說。」417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtEXaH5ea7C
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「閉嘴！才沒有！」我面紅耳赤，不等祂說完就直接跳進轉生之門。417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZ5MqSbBWgG
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在那之後的十六年後，我進入高中，開始體驗人生中的第十一次青春期。我準備好要應付戀愛這場激烈的戰爭，也希望自己能在這一次的青春期成功脫魯。417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡduBJ660vI7
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這個想法，只持續到進入教室的那一刻，遇見「她」為止。417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡE9xZzVwbN1
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「柳困！該起床了啊！」一陣衝擊襲向趴在桌上的我，我一個重心不穩隨著椅子整個人倒在教室冰涼的地板上。417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnT3iUc20qM
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「妳搞什麼啊！」我抱怨，起身拍掉制服上沾到的灰塵，「現在不是還在午休時間嗎？」417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡT7t210PoaA
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「才不是，這節是外堂課欸。」說話的是一位臉頰微微泛紅的女學生。她的右腳舉著，明顯就是剛把我踹下椅子的樣子。417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4BSdaeUppx
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我默默的翻白眼，但是沒有回嘴，避免招來一頓拳頭。417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ651iEMcNd9
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我轉頭看了看四周，同學們都走光了，只剩下空蕩的桌椅。417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQpR83EFvOF
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「走囉，體育課。」女學生紅著臉帶頭走出教室，我則跟在她後面。417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8mINTKmpK6
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什麼？你說她看起來就像是對我有意思，問我為什麼不跟她交往就好了？417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcpgzJRNClD
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我們再次回到剛剛的話題。417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1gcCa5ZOEI
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在高一時，我遇見了「她」。417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtszW047RaW
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她有著一頭紫色的長直髮，看到人總是臉頰泛紅，一副害羞的表情，還擁有一個美麗的名字：賴妍。417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmtga6N3a6t
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剛開始，全班的男學生都急著對賴妍獻殷勤，不過到了下學期的時候對她告白的人卻只剩下其他班的學生。417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGxNR6Nxfas
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原因很單純：因為這個人很恐怖。417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjcOZlHEnMn
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恐怖到甚至被取了「瘋狗」這個外號。417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡD9VvZTOzBK
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至於一天到晚臉頰泛紅的原因也不是因為「為了要操控他人」這種複雜的理由，而是因為「酒精」。417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3BHk5t46hz
417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡInQeaMrK5x

賴妍是我在到目前為止的十一個人生裡面，見過唯一一個可以在午餐時間拿整瓶五十度烈酒配完白飯的女人。417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoMdQh3SY2e
417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ03k8vDjGta

永遠沒人知道她喝醉之後下一件會做出什麼超乎常理的事。417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzNwQ41DTWV
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我們兩人快步走到操場，看見體育老師早就已經帶完操，放同學去打球了，所以我直接略過暖身，自己抓了一顆地上的籃球，走到籃球場練習投籃。417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡliyNwmfcy6
417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡR05ICfGYmi

「同學！」我投進第三球時，體育老師吹起哨子，「請不要在操場喝小米酒！」417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡM36YxEXU3k
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我馬上轉頭，看見一旁換好體育服的賴妍把一隻腳放在長椅上，仰起頭抓著酒瓶猛灌。417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrD1zfKNS8M

如果把背景換成公園，那她看起來就像一個普通的公園醉漢。417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRcm6FTaHf6
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但是這裡是學校啊！

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「可是老師，我在暖身欸。」賴妍把酒一口氣喝完然後發出「噗哈」的聲音，接著用手背豪氣的抹抹嘴，最後啐了一口痰在操場外的草皮上。417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpGpBZHg1qc
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這不是完全就是公園裡的醉漢嗎！417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4p9Ah83N31
417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJ4zVgeNWE7

「那邊那位同學！」體育老師又朝另一邊大喊，「請不要在體育課投擲燃燒瓶！」417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFHoZxTFJgU
417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡapqS6LDUu3

「可是老師，我在暖身耶。」手裡握著燃燒瓶正準備要丟的男同學停下動作。417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡK8x9zRghP8
417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡH0pyyaX7Rz

這貨的名字叫簡澄，不知為何，他對燃燒瓶有著近乎癡狂的異常執著，不論是何種問題、處境都會想使用燃燒瓶來解決。417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbwHYMuBuCh
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對他來說，世界上不存在他的燃燒瓶解決不了的事物。417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbiNewnx0mx
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有時候問題甚至還真的能夠解決，不過這只讓他變本加厲。417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRhm7rQPn9D
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像是現在。417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVyNX5YdFGJ
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你根本是在幫其他同學暖身吧！417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5HUMPKc9vi
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你旁邊的女同學已經快要哭出來了啊！417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3qjhvRQuJ0
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體育老師也快來阻止一下他吧！417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrBtAdVDACo
417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡH8wgnF07rA

「那暖身完記得收起來喔。」體育老師又繼續回頭看他的閣樓雜誌。417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhRdeb1hXxT
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你這體育老師也太淡定了吧！417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhJh71ADROb
417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfVPqju7DUv

至少先給我把閣樓雜誌收起來啊！417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOC99uCEfIO
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在簡澄下手之前，另一位男同學抓住了他的手腕。417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡs9LlGZ7uy7
417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXEwa4c21K6

「住手吧，簡澄boy，這樣不cool喔。」417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8R80ySkfJq

男同學一手抓住簡澄，一手按在自己的臉上。417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcnC4CEjijB
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「可惡，最麻煩的傢伙出現了…」簡澄低聲抱怨。417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiQwt4X6c1K
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「你的惡行，就由我冥界的魔之眷屬 · 暗爪的歐威爾，依你的行為施以制ㄘㄞ────」417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7zNTFoqhPy
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「三岐，你的錢包掉了。」我走過去，撿起掉在暗爪的歐威爾身旁的錢包。417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHdyVnwhanc
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「……我不是三岐，我是鋼爪的歐威爾。」417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2hsbOYLW9O
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「你剛剛說暗爪。」417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡp9MdYqe1c7
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「不，柳困boy，我很清楚我是誰，」他一手放在胸前，一手放在身後，雙腳交叉向我行禮。

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「我，是冥界的邪王 · 鋼爪的麥歐爾，出自於冥界的望族，進入人間是為了要拯救我的妹妹，也就是冥界的公主，鎖鏈的康妮。」417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfyLpb2d6sC
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「你本來說歐威爾。」417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡztrOgAan8l
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「那、那是一時口誤……」417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡg4WElDTReo
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「你，」我嚴肅的對著他說，「根本不知道自己是誰對吧？」417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYqBnyqwFE2
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「不…我不……」他按著額頭，露出痛苦的神色，在地上打滾。「不行……！『魂』…滾出我的腦海啊啊啊啊啊啊啊！！」417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxsI4nF6dzR
417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGKwk5nQIdn

「邪王好弱。」我發牢騷。話說回來，魂界也沒有邪王這種東西就是了。417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDpV1pXwCVy
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「這個給你，振作起來吧，」簡澄把手中的燃燒瓶遞給他，為他加油打氣，「你可沒有這麼容易倒下！因為……417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7vIdIPiQPM
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「因為你可是……我的宿敵啊。」417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡN9CGbI2dvv
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簡澄露出了豪氣的笑容，把手伸向在地上的三岐。417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcUJiyBnf4K
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三岐擦乾淚水，回握住簡澄的手，正準備從地上爬起的時候，「有沒有人～看到我的～瓶～～～～子～～～～～～～～～」被喝的爛醉的賴妍一腳踩在後腦。417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6jDKzV7KrF
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「你不是說只要暖身嗎！」「被」趴在地上的三岐吐槽。417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaPD5NilgoK
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「喔呀…？」賴妍往下一看，「早安啊三岐同學～在那裡玩會弄髒身體喔？」417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcwRl9rZVwu
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「妳先從我身上下來啊！」三岐掙扎。417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQIVNFdY5VO
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「喔喔喔喔！好像在玩衝浪喔！」賴妍努力維持平衡。417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡa5o8KdQofH
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「妳這是……在噗喔小看我身為暗印者的力量嗎……？」三岐說到一半還吃到土。417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBvdDbRiDBk
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「衝浪了喔喔喔喔喔！」賴妍開心的大笑。417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJu6HhYHsV2
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她根本就沒在聽啊！417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmNKZtztqJ3
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「同學！」體育老師從看雜誌的姿勢抬頭，

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「不要霸凌有精神障礙的同學好嗎！」417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡz8O3RKUrLL
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他只是中二病還沒好而已啊！為什麼變成精神障礙了！417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡncgDU5ZPff
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「可是老師你看三岐，」在賴妍腳下的三岐已經整張臉埋在土裡了，「他玩的很開心耶。」417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4M79vO9CgV
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「唔唔唔唔唔唔唔唔！」三岐口齒不清的哀嚎。417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZjEVQAd4w1
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「注意不要讓同學受傷喔。」體育老師繼續看閣樓雜誌。417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnGppvaRxAs
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這已經不是受傷的問題了吧！417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡafcMybBjrz
417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaqOzJuiu0g

所以說給我把雜誌收起來啊！417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡk3NJyrW6b3
417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡY2Lj8XSrfS

「夠唔喔了吧！」臉不斷砸向地板的三岐好不容易擠出一句話。417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlB6ZD8d3UV
417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRjZAV7qs8B

「…………」賴妍臉一僵，慢慢低頭，看著她腳底下不斷扭動的三岐。417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡANKI3cCsYd
417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDPZjig9P9k

「我、我的衝浪板會說話…好噁心喔……」417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDwAEibQsqR
417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡX5zO181bdH

她眼眶泛紅，吸了一次鼻子。417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYAhMplzWX5
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兩次。417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiWaEj5YKaM
417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkSBmySm4NN

「嗚嗚………………」賴妍開始不顧一切地大哭。417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFLFZ8oUaU6
417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡR6L3oJIxW8

「三岐同學真壞。」

417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1kWAgrjzuz

「好糟糕喔。」

417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmvpQ71VdIr

「竟然害奇怪的東西哭了。」旁邊圍觀的同學們開始交頭接耳。417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXB5AGmT0iV
417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡazKRc0VYsI

說別人是奇怪的東西也太過份了吧！417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡK4peMUvrF3
417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ89CuPr7Ywz

「所以現在是我的問題囉！」三岐好不容易從嚎啕大哭的賴妍腳下逃開。417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡc5p02X56wD
417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8yjQ9NvNQt

「喂！誰來安慰她一下啊！」一位男同學慌張的大喊。417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzVXE0cFOQV
417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4BALrHzDqr

「我能讓他冷靜一下。」簡澄拿出燃燒瓶。417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhacwfo0fmA
417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ16cH1SSd4e

「你只是要讓她熱起來吧！」417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6PGwxTiL2K
417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6OnVkK9TuV

「被吾封印的眷屬呦，僅從吾之召喚───」三岐振振有詞。417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjJYxBDuJKv
417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmVjuQPG8A3

「你是要安慰她還是收了她啊啊！」417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtYMWZ7dEBE
417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡl99fIkf7uS

「收了她。」三岐露出一副理所當然的表情。417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeVuMuzUHii
417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5sWTgsCjBy

「你們根本是來亂的吧！」你們別亂搞，我等等還要收尾啊！417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJCoGrETOC6
417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡM1oumG2Bof

「年輕人們。」不知道何時走到我們旁邊的體育老師開口了，「就憑你們是無法解決這種毀滅性天災的。」417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLG1nWGQKYJ
417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcU0EU9iDLC

「為什麼又從奇怪的東西變成毀滅性天災！」417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxxXYECeT7r
417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ791n4USLCX

「因為奇怪的東西放久了本來就會變成毀滅性天災。」417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzPsGDddUOb
417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsOCeAj7E5i

我不是在問這個啊啊啊啊啊！417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIW9YjHMxkh
417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡejwaQvnhbX

老師又開口說：「現在，我就讓你們看看，真正的『大人的辦法』。」417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4VvBuoPPrL
417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDz6EUQueWW

「『大人的辦法』……」簡澄看著老師嚴肅的臉，吞了口口水。417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLrCDVQH3ln
417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvx8fhucLZo

「賴妍同學。」他走到賴妍面前。賴妍因為震驚而暫時忘記了哭泣。417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEhbmMAKtZ9
417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7jELBykmXD

話說我們的體育老師是一位看上去年過四十的大叔，比班上所有除了我以外的同學都還要早經歷了傳說中的青春期，再加上已經在這所高中任職了十年以上，所以應該也有足夠的能力與經驗能解決這種事ㄑ────417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlr8ti6lQm6
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「你看，這是丁丁。」他脫下褲子。417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbta99bFY9v
417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhw9Bs2qofJ

    是真正意義上的『讓你們看看』啊啊啊啊啊啊啊！417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgCQQe2o4XA
417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjngwCR73W4
417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgfuQlduj6Z
  當日結果：417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcPSb4vgqeE

賴妍平安無事（哭累了被女同學背回教室）。417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvmaEXVrtYw
簡澄打電話報警，體育老師於上課中被警察抓走，兩人前往警局做筆錄。417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5fAZOgnjeF
417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3dudRDVxDu

三岐臉部異常腫脹，被帶去了醫務室。417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRHBEmursHY
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其他同學（包括柳困）於下一節正常上課。417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡp9C7DAOQHw
417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKXf7raZ5aa

柳困依然單身。

417Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡI3vgPEiDJb

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第一章 體育課！

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第一章體育課！