同學們面面相覷。359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2sM8FfnJ6y
359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡl7sZFJzyWb

「那個……您是不是走錯教室了呢？」身為班長的我起身詢問。359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxx4Ekv61pO
359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6Mw3sLvpUb

「啊，你們的數學老師請假，所以今天是我代課喔。」359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRLO3lZwxPF
359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVwbTKR3755

「咦咦？沒用的老東西請假？」賴妍驚訝的問。359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9MbeFGZnuI
359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡD1ZNsbXcxu

「請不要叫數學老師沒用的老東西。」359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡskVhzX39Ad
359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOvVuBVpORk

「那改成老不羞好了。」359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIw8FV1KMaD
359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡM8RhfYQYNM

「更糟糕了啊！」359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6QcgVfPEcQ
359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOK66Cjtwdb

「咳，總之，」代課老師乾咳一聲打斷我們的對話，「請各位打開課本第……為什麼桌上有酒瓶？」359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqE2IsMZDnn
359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcsE7MScSoV

「因為上一節是化學課。」正在製作燃燒瓶的簡澄說。359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2cW8Z4lWEP
359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvfvYnNydy1

「那你桌上正在燒的酒精燈是怎樣？」359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0SjhJjUVQP
359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡK1VX3ziNRK

「老師，它正在暖身。」359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2ztxhaUkNj
359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmTzgQF5lpz

「它是要暖什麼身啊！給我拿回去實驗室放好！」359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmoJmN95apB
359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡS0v4SKjibe

「我要去！」賴妍自告奮勇的起身。359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdKEczHUZRE
359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdaDXVQ1nfY

「給我坐下，妳不值得信賴。」我不耐煩的說。「三岐，你去放。」359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrJjhZTWk5b
359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwaG8wGJ7F6

「那我改姓三岐。」359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdSN4Lzm8Ek
359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpiyA1qoNiB

「才不是這個意思！」359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVf6mptQO4X
359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHPFf6Sbbsy

「而且為什麼是三岐！」剛剛還趴著的三岐抗議。359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡA3ISCDRZQP
359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVN1xt5kE61

「少囉唆！快點給我去放！」我用課本敲三岐的頭，「別跟著搗亂上課秩序好嗎？」359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHvT7UMAdyd
359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQy9yrf7I7J

「汝等下級生物，竟敢命令本元帥，看我痛啊啊啊啊啊啊！」三岐的話還沒說完就被我再次用力敲頭，不過這次用的是不鏽鋼水壺。359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8Zfmi5GEgV
359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDgbLXfdOfl

「元帥好弱。」359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQofgw7Dbv1
359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHYgJ4uElTs

「你根本是想殺了我吧！」359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4PdhhuCWkj
359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPyAl6tRyvR

「同學們！請安靜！」代課老師看起來有些惱火。「全部給我翻開課本！」359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNh13Pjo6W6
359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzAq11IYrQt

「老師。」賴妍突然嚴肅的開口，「你覺得數學的意義到底是什麼？數學又是為何而存在？」359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFl3o9d88hF
359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfk5WJIvh1k

「數學是為何而存在…………？」老師陷入沉思。359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpfSEGYaX1O
  除了賴妍之外的同學們臉色一沉。359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡx0rWTUPxlD
359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZbe5E3QZ3a

「老師！別中計啊！」359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2jsjbzh2fj
359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeFIKqx9CYH

「這傢伙的腦子才不會思考這種深奧的東西呢！」359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡs7vt4dM1II
359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ94Fsqr8FMM

「她只是單純不想上數學課而已啊！」359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBvN2oUnNvh
359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBDimKovile

    不過老師抬起手制止了那些警告他的同學。359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdrp4gnwsIe
359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZ5XVbIDyzL

「我認為……」在思考片刻之後，老師開口，

「數學是使生活變得更方便的工具。」359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnFI3A7XB1J
359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZIcorKY5HV

「真的是這樣嗎？」賴妍問。359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡar867ksKRw
359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBBy7Dv4dve

「古埃及人與巴比倫人靠著幾何學的幫助，建造出了許多壯觀的建築物！牛頓發明的微積分也間接造福了許多人類！」老師越說越激動，「所以我才會選擇就讀數學系，成為數學老師！數學對我來說就是世界的真理！就是絕對的信仰！」359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9vJPEnvSP5
359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFaZwfsUfhL

「那……如果我說，」賴妍緩緩開口，「我能反駁你的論點呢？」359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnVZ3rF9rJP
359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfdTXzgBVLo

「什──」359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYJI0tTPjPd
359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbTFyl21fc8

「如果我能證明…………數學並不是世界的真理呢？」359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFbwSOVrZyi
359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVKmeELnjVC

「臭小鬼！妳明白妳在說什麼嗎！妳說的話是對神的褻瀆！」代課老師憤怒地吼道。359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUEcuicdjWd
359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqs6RT0aWH6

「那個，班長，」坐在我後面的男同學輕聲對我說，「這部不是日常番嗎？為什麼會出現戰鬥番的台詞？」359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcVSLnex1u5
359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcGCjKAJZOf

「我也很好奇啊！而且現在不是數學課嗎！」

  

  最重要的是，代課老師已經在不知不覺間步入了賴妍「不想上課」的節奏之中，這才是她被稱為瘋狗的最大原因。359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbffg09DFN9
359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡU50WptuIGs

    真正恐怖的地方還在後頭。359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQ9RbeprG0S
359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTz94PIcBju

「老師……你知道數學的英文，Math的意義，其實是Mental Abuse To Humans，也就是人類精神虐待的意思喔？」359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡX5i8lyA1Qn
359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFHsqWvZOq5

「那只是討厭數學的人提出的可悲巧合而已！」359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiA1theG815
359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1OslVWBtDV

    賴妍歪頭。359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSZJNHp2KWx
359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNIZbmsVqwo

「如果數學是真理，為什麼有人會討厭祂呢？」她問道。359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDjgP2kcnds
359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhl05uRvMdv

「因為世界上總是有許多自以為是的人！他們只因為生活不如預期，就怪罪到神聖的信仰上面！」359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4hOMiaNqMq
359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJiHsyaemvZ

「生活不如預期？你是指生活中的事發生無法用真理解釋的情況嗎？還是生活並沒有想像中的便利？」359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZzhcxsTOWA
359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ14XlWq2ica

「世上所有的事情一定都有辦法用真理來說明！」359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9zCUAPW5LH
359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡon9FH9phMv

「真的嗎？」賴妍正色道，「那我舉個簡單的例子吧。您有看過商店中『買二送一』的活動嗎？」359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsSmmM0YuoP
359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZIkVMy98iY

「當然有。」代課老師不耐煩地回答。359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡU3VqABS9DM
359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2YmD6ptWwx

「那麼一加一等於幾？這只是單純的數學問題，不是腦筋急轉彎喔。」359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2ajlIvcA5S
359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡECqK3qTqMr

「一加一等於二。」359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNfZXD8Mnw1
359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcaWRh9VJYJ

「啊咧？奇怪了？」賴妍故意用困惑的語氣說到，「我只付了兩個物品的價錢，為什麼我得到了三倍的利潤？好奇怪吶～」359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVirXaHjlI7
359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ323MjkhdL3

「……咦？」老師愣住了。359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7LB2It4eRO
359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡypk03g5KEO

「這樣子算式就變成了『一加一等於三』而不是真理所說的二了呢。」359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZrlylBC64L
359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3WP5aSknZk

「什…怎麼會……」代課老師開始感到恐慌。359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwFbRzw0Wac
359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHx8i5Uhac0

「老師別中計啊！那只是一種行銷手法而已啊！」我大喊。359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnXaf7PJ8uS
359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡw68tCzEdIA

「我…但是、但是一加一應該……還是等於二啊…………？」代課老師緩緩抬頭，用困惑而渙散的眼神看著我，就像一位瀕臨崩潰的精神病患者。359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdZeQNOafHn
359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLy3De7xOjB

    完蛋了。359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGqJkKyfEna
359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbsaZ1vHDVj

「我再舉一個例子吧。」賴妍再次開口。「剛剛說了一加一等於三，但是這也不是正確答案。359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsxs4qh7qjr
359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡO2FuYQSyHX

「您應該也知道結婚是什麼吧？就是長期的一對一賣春契約。」359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXpFlN0lw5T
359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDF3Zx3cjma

「才不是這樣！」我吐槽。359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZcOLNTqRef
359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuuh92BCvPd

「好奇怪吶。住在我家隔壁的王叔叔明明結婚了，為什麼最近兩個月，在王阿姨不在的週五晚上，還會出現另外六個女人陪他過夜呢？」359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqzr9rC841A
359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnCoxMZt0WQ

「這種事情你應該早點去跟王阿姨說才對吧！」359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCdchnbaGaE
359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqGkxgK35GV

「咦咦，」賴妍不理我，「一加一不是等於三嗎？為什麼同時又等於八呢？」359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2XJ1ljQeYK
359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXufCwg6Ib4

「為什麼啊啊啊啊啊！」代課老師抱住頭，驚慌失措地尖叫。「為什麼真理要遺棄我啊啊啊啊！」359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAoQ4K0RZAW
359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡixEXS7WQ0T

「沒錯，就是因為人們被你所說的真理拋棄，才會轉而討厭，甚至憎恨數學。對他們來說，數學不只不是世界上的真理，更不是讓生活變得更方便的工具！」359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXytW3rNejI
359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoNmUyJ6Nza

    賴妍深呼吸，補上了最後一擊：「對他們來說，數學只是讓生活更不方便的枷鎖！只是阻礙人類發展的、根本沒有存在必要的、無用垃圾而已啊！」359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlXo1nW06Ft
359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrKRdt1lnWc

「啊啊啊啊啊啊啊啊啊啊……」359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjl6exjl48v
359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqTFgi4o9is

    老師緩緩蹲下，雙手抱住膝蓋，露出自己長久以來深信的事情在一夕之間被摧毀的表情。359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBFpbFWGcrS
359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkTWG3qocpY

  這時，去化學教室放酒精燈的三岐回來了。359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsBE5v178Uk

    老師彷彿看見了希望一般，朝著三岐跑過去，抓住了他的肩膀，用力地前後搖動。359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdbGJOsySkp
359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ41XNG2QJpu

「同學！一加一等於多少！」359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmVhgIpyZxT
359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLStPdGjHZT

「咦？」在狀況外的三岐很錯愕。359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbJeCcRvPLR
359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7FwoG5Vzf7

    賴妍露出了勝利的微笑，坐回位子上，舒服的翹起二郎腿，抓著桌上的白蘭地仰頭灌了一大口。359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOTphPHOvOk
359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVQzqXo4o0B

「到底等於多少啊啊啊啊啊！！！」代課老師瘋狂地大喊。359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFriiY55Dhf
359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡd1xQzfItM1

「等、等於五十……」一天到晚吃麥O勞的三岐結結巴巴的回答。359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡA8EPidRspy
359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHCxwYNKgD9

「三等於八、八等於五十……等式應該不成立才…三又等於五十……啊啊啊啊啊啊啊啊啊啊啊！」代課老師崩潰了，尖叫著衝出了教室。359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFD7KpPrgbr
359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9TmwnmGtA5

    全班盯著三岐。359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLcQqnORHaW
359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmJFE62gzSo

「欸？我做錯什麼了嗎？」三岐很錯愕。359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡS2WCHdtcGl
359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡppJGEooyh6

    賴妍抬頭看了一眼教室牆上的時鐘。359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlGJDL53mX3
359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsKychYjkUQ

「呦喜！多賺到了半小時下課時間。」她握拳。359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5L0pFvbtnM
359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTjDPnGCdY3

「呦喜妳個大頭！他被你弄壞了啦！」我慌張地大喊，「全班快點出去幫忙找代課老師啊！」359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkM1B18j1HR
359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡonNOK9Wgx3
359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSD1Yff5wAE

當日結果：359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡckdIC36Ntz
359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡScREhgCK8a

    在數學科辦公室全體數學老師的幫忙下，於放學前在校舍頂樓的花圃角落發現了喃喃自語著「三等於八等於五十三等於八等於五十三等於八等於五十我被神拋棄了嗚嗚嗚我要成為一棵用費波納契數列整齊排列的植物三等於八等於五十三等於八等於五十…」的代課老師，並送到附近醫院的精神科治療。359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡm92ufvKfiR
359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡs8giwipx9s

    賴妍被記了一支大過（目前總共七支）。359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTMtoM0mpPf
359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1oZmWb6L12

    柳困依然單身。359Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtXGiBuoYrX