Kat699Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAjqzUDTQBK
699Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPkQZr3xyXX
January 1, 2005
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Same day
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699Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeN26vxgP3O
"That's... not... I wasn't..." I try to explain, but now that the lust haze is gone, I am unable to rationalize my actions. 699Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3hHrCgptjn
Was that what I was doing? I wanted to stop thinking about everything and I figured with what I heard about Ben, he wouldn't complain. 699Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaNsc2LdixE
"Ugh... I'm such an idiot." I cover my face with my hands. I just want to get out of here. Laying next to him in my underwear after being rejected is so embarrassing. I need to leave.699Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfOlMcE1wqe
He pulls my hands away from my face. His eyes meeting mine. "No, you aren't. You are just hurting."699Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡScREPUIgXz
Is that it?699Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHftMwn5Y1k
When I caught him with that whore, I was almost relieved. Maybe I'm just not processing my emotions properly... 699Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGED5CKet73
I should be devastated. I mean, I am really upset, but I feel more like I'm mourning the life I lost, not the person. 699Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkVLldndPFW
I think he wanted to get caught. He probably hoped I would join in or something.699Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdaT2bZjTZg
What a creep. How could I give so much to him? I cannot let myself get wrapped up in another man like that again. 699Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCPs1n60Zo4
I need to be strong. 699Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIdN8WNR0qh
699Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSdWIhB04Nc
I need to be independent. 699Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9Ybu0bti0K
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I need to make better choices. 699Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmanIPRz9E8
I need to... not be here. Crap.699Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCu2D3hTdhk
Ben makes me feel weak and vulnerable.699Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoOYaqf1I4J
But also powerful and wanted. 699Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡN7W7rB7CY7
Ugh... I am so confused. 699Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9O2NMl483s
I do know that hopping from one guy literally onto another is not a good choice.699Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡatqpYDasjD
I also know that nothing casual can happen with my best friend's boyfriend's best friend. That would be all kinds of complicated. 699Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQmAb3bOI3a
Hopefully I haven't made things too awkward. Oh god, what if they get married? I will have to see him all the time. I will be reminded of this night forever.699Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxfR9J6It1D
He smirks, tucking my hair behind my ear. "There she is, the wheels are turning again." 699Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRZSa4P2zds
I can't help the laugh that bubbles up. I probably sound insane, but this night is all sorts of messed up. 699Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOORO2fKDdd
His face lights up and his dimples emerge. Crap. His smile turns my insides to jelly.699Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcpepIyFfPW
"Come on, Katarina, give the poor little hamster a break. Tell me your thoughts." He gives me a reassuring smile. I'm not sure I like him using my full name, it makes my heart flutter.699Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0P9JhK0XYI
"I think..." I need a light topic. I just want to ignore my problems. "I think this has been the weirdest night."699Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYTIIOdepX8
He nods in agreement. "Weird good or weird bad?"699Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5tLv091zKT
"Hah... Both?" I wince, knowing he's going to prod for more and I don't want to go any deeper.699Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJp25x2qAte
"I am going to have to agree with you." I was not expecting him to agree. "Although, I think yours had a bit more bad than mine." His hand caresses my cheek and I can't help but lean into his touch. 699Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUGM5qzWnr5
I am so weak. 699Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdqbJui8bdF
"Hmm..." His touch is relaxing and I feel the day catching up with me. The emotions and tears taking their toll on my body. 699Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡThUCiwxE54
"You falling asleep on me, Kitty Kat?" I can hear the smile in his voice, but I'm having trouble keeping my eyes open.699Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKeaMdx4oX6
"I am not a cat." I say, as sternly as I can muster, but it comes out weak. 699Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0kSDOt7IpP
"Meow." He chuckles at his own joke.699Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6AnycmfMjy
"You are so not funny." I mumble.699Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrGTKqtAQAw
"Oh come on. You're no fun." He tries to tease me, but he doesn't realize just how accurate he is. 699Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgrJguRVunI
Maybe if I were more fun, things would be different. 699Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTqYzorx3IJ
"If only you knew..." I snuggle into his hard chest, hoping he won't ask anymore questions. 699Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJqznhVXFhf
I know I should leave, but I just can't bring myself to part with him. I'm sure he's filling some void and I'm being pathetic, but he hasn't thrown me out yet.699Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNiU03W3oEh
In fact, he pulls me tighter. Resting his face in my hair. 699Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ07HNl7toQN
"Don't worry, I will protect you." He whispers and as I drift off into oblivion, I actually believe him. 699Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0jonw7M1FC
I awake to the sounds of muffled shouting. There is a heated argument somewhere nearby. 699Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZBBg0LfHBF
When I try to move, I bump something hard with my elbow and freeze. I hear a groan and feel the bed move slightly. I am not alone.699Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpM2ICsk2Ny
Oh no. 699Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAlNH7C4dif
What did I do? 699Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwt3GjZ6Ouj
Scanning the room, I realize I have no idea where I am or who could be behind me.699Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡD1piI0y0ch
Unless Vanessa is having a really rough morning, that was definitely too deep to be her voice.699Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfmeWJhPR3a
Crap. I am too afraid to look, who could it be? Bits and pieces from the night come to me, but not enough to piece together anything solid.699Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRSI4nrARAK
I remember crying at some point.699Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWcsY36jbXz
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I remember drinking more than I should have.699Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyAeqAWt4ym
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I remember Vanessa being her usual self. 699Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTDNzPuEzLY
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I remember her new boy toy stuck to her side. 699Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7qO7JUZqB3
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And I remember... Uh oh. 699Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhPuv6TpZ8P
It couldn't be... I wouldn't... Would I?699Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0FlGQgWQgQ
Am I really asking myself this after waking up next to some random guy? Well, maybe not so random...699Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdhMxPElg9f
Oh god, this is all sorts of complicated. 699Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfEJoa8DkqK
Okay, I just have to know... I try to roll over gently, without disturbing him. 699Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWWKrVWXIM1
I find a pair of amused green eyes staring back at me. A gorgeous grin with dimples on his stupid perfect face. 699Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqBubmLveQb
Crap. 699Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡP0NZjhGwTd
I know I'm blushing hard, I can literally feel my face burning. 699Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCLjD657z5T
How did this happen?699Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡej1eUvIYyD
"You done freaking out yet?" He asks with a chuckle. 699Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjrcNi1T3ta
Is he... laughing at me? 699Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkE1OxeYLRr
"Uh..." And just like that, he has short circuited the connection between my brain and mouth. 699Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkTwxZyMTYO
"Don't panic." He talks softly, like I am some wild animal that might bite him.699Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmoiuVjymtB
I am totally panicking. I just can't decide if I want to run out of the room or stay and figure out what exactly happened. 699Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡW8v4opQDIy
My curiosity wins, just barely. 699Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUot52F414A
"Nothing happened." I must look really confused, because he feels the need to explain further. "We didn't have sex."699Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡH8BrwgsUtq
"Oh..." I'm not sure if I should be relieved or hurt that he was naked laying next to me.699Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiA8kpqpr59
Nope. Not letting my mind go there.699Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHWdVQt0miF
I choose to feel relief. I wouldn't have remembered it anyway. 699Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYzvmeub3g4
"Not for lack of you trying, of course." He flashes a cocky smirk at me. 699Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKvb0LmrBe3
I feel a frown tugging at the corners of my mouth, despite my attempt to keep my face neutral. No, I didn't throw myself at him, did I? 699Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCSGwoaLcaJ
I vaguely remember waking up and thinking I heard my name through the wall and then... 699Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1Uk5yee2qX
"No way... I... Oh god!" My eyes pop open so wide, they begin to hurt.699Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfDBmO3Oe6G
Crap. Did I really climb on top of him? Yep, I was totally grinding on him.699Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡN8ePwqJeBZ
I gasp, my gaze running down his body before I can stop myself. I take in his muscles, but his bottom half is covered in a sheet. 699Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡThdNbPIWTR
His eyes meet mine. "Reminiscing?" 699Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVIirdnXcI8
"What! No!" My voice is too high and rushed to be convincing. 699Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHKw6ep86kE
I remember licking his defined chest.699Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrHbw9SvYib
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I remember... 699Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡk4DgMDnXDD
he was naked!699Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1KHFr5Yyq1
I inwardly groan. I totally touched him. I know how big he is and... 699Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcedzOTKSlF
Oh god! I know how he tastes. 699Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnsZZNAIRPm
"Shit." I know it's inelegant, but I can't think of anything else to say.699Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsQH44vE6qU
His mouth pops open as his face twists in shock. "Did you just... I can't believe you just said shit!" 699Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzPuEn98Y2K
"What? Why not?" I sit up, feeling defensive. 699Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8cNFOjZQFV
Why is he so shocked? He barely knows me. Why does he assume this? Did I say something weird last night?699Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7BlraE6M44
"You seemed kinda offended when I cussed, so I guess I just assumed..." He looks shy, almost like he was caught doing something wrong.699Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmZAKspDXKd
"Based on?" Sure, I don't make a habit of using curse words, but it's more an ingrained reflex than an actual choice. 699Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡp15MBdZTJr
He hesitates, like he's afraid to say and I begin to feel slightly nervous. Crap, what did I say?699Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzT1YNlWvPm
"You... uh... kinda flinched." He blushes and looks around the room. Insecure Ben is totally adorable. 699Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPC4dYzivEm
"Oh." I'm honestly not sure how to respond because I definitely can't tell him the truth. "Well, I wasn't offended."699Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0AMW4sl52B
"Okay." He blows out a breath, looking up at the ceiling. "If you say so." 699Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2Gm2h0vitM
He looks completely unconvinced but I can't give him more than that. 699Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡK2MacSXExJ
"So." He clears his throat. "Not to be totally awkward here..." His gaze drops to the tent of his crotch before his eyes scan the floor. 699Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡV5fXR6xs6t
"And not that I would mind laying in bed with you all day." He looks down my body and winks. "But, maybe we should get dressed?"699Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ260gqhPcev
I look down at myself, just now realizing I'm sitting here in lacy underwear. 699Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡE0EdCBjMTw
When I don't respond, Ben flashes his smile. "Or not, I mean you look great." 699Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPbzhx1fI12
I am unable to hide the look of shock on my face before I snatch the sheet to cover myself. 699Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1U04mUQYEU
Which is no longer covering "Little Ben", if you can even call it that.699Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCjrHjNueWv
Oops.699Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAXo9zfOwdM
Of course that would happen to me! I take a moment to look at it in the daylight and wow, it's like a sculpture. 699Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4ddtBoOtkz
Unable to stop myself, I have apparently lost my filter completely around this man. 699Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXLxHKLj0xp
"Well hello, Big Ben." I try not to giggle like an immature school girl, but Ben's laugh makes me laugh harder. 699Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRb53WU1SII
"Big Ben, huh?" He grins, making my stomach flutter. He shakes his head, amused. "What am I going to do with you?"699Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjWCOTYInqn
My mouth goes dry as my mind conjures up all kinds of things he could do to me. It feels like all the air was sucked out of the room as I struggle to control my breathing. Is it hot in here, or is it just me?699Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡI9hWV7NiUg
My gaze returns to "Big Ben", as it seems to grow, straining to reach me. 699Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡv4VlkfZS3c
Prying my eyes away, I meet his green gaze. He's no longer grinning or teasing, in fact, it looks like he's in pain. 699Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡddoVOOEJbK
"So, you like what you see?" His eyes never leaving mine. I try to close my mouth and steady my breathing. I need to keep my composure, but my head nods without my approval. 699Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJDMDAZZupo
I lick my lips, remembering last night. I can't get my mouth to form words.699Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEFxGHXVFjV
"Because I wouldn't mind seeing a little more." He reaches forward, tugging down the sheet. 699Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡY6TTdtEbVK
He sucks in a breath. "Fuck, Kat."699Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkxZyhvyAy8
I close my eyes, my insides turning to liquid fire. I love his cussing, like he can't control himself. Maybe it's because of my background and it makes him seem like such a bad boy, but it turns me on, like crazy.699Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhjx1jpZ8In
He caresses my breasts through the sheer fabric. "God damn, you are beautiful." 699Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaCo2qj5Kyl
I absorb his words as another wave of lust hits me. I know this is a bad idea. I know we should not be doing this, but I'm not sure I could stop it, even if I wanted to. 699Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnStpv0Hxfo
His hands move down my body as his mouth meets mine. His kiss is hungry and desperate and I can't get enough. 699Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfoeddiEk9p
His hand grazes me where I'm aching and I nearly explode. I need him. Now. 699Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡA2QpkkxTyg
"Do you have a condom?" He has to have one in here somewhere, right?699Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ28CIsbufcu
He blushes and looks slightly uncomfortable. "Actually..." We both freeze as the sound of yelling grows closer. 699Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjltZtJA026
I pull the sheet up to cover myself just as the door bursts open. All I see Vanessa's fiery hair flying around as she takes the scene before her. "What the fucking fuck is fucking going on in here?" 699Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMn3HH4uc3Y
I know her well enough to know when she can't think, she drops f-bombs. Her gaze drops to Ben's crotch, before he grabs a corner of the sheet to cover himself. 699Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡn8PaDH8AYR
I can't help the laughter that bursts out of me at the sight of her craziness. "Calm yourself, Vanessa."
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