Ben775Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyzE2tgGgPE
775Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡj6cx9dVQqK
February 14, 2005
*
Same day
*
I see her across the room. 775Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡprxezeiOvR
775Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2XgQDSyDnz
Of course I see her.775Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyKBOODtRNN
I always see her.775Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYVsDvZcDRq
And she's just as fucking beautiful as always. Maybe even more so.775Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBA8IuNPTNR
Damn it.775Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqxgDrg34vl
I need to stop looking at her. 775Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡW5hSfxPmdE
This is fucking Valentine's Day. The Holiday for desperate chicks, so why the fuck am I sitting here alone?775Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡub6soYRbb4
You already know the answer to that, you fucking idiot. 775Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡm4StBElGCG
Damn it.775Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNe2nZwWo1p
I scan the room for the thousandth time. My gaze lands on her, like it always does. 775Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7quQbl4rQo
I want her so much, it physically hurts. I couldn't think about anyone else, even if I wanted to.775Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ95DzPJooo8
I don't want to. I want her, only her. 775Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRxkL5Yt0jl
But I fucked it up. 775Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡi6WwpMYsAW
775Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8BI72wfQ62
Of course I fucked it up.775Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1ZUSvGkyxE
775Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡS8LvqFb25X
Because I'm a fucking idiot.775Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOJOrJ6DbBN
And now she really hates me. She's been avoiding me this whole time. 775Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4oedOz1dNJ
It feels like a fucking knife in my chest every time I see her and she's not near me.775Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmTL2MrrfY5
I need to touch her soft skin. I want to kiss her sexy lips. 775Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJs8bK3jSVR
Can lips be sexy?775Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmpXIF6dpX5
I don't know, but hers are. Everything about her is perfect. 775Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ80YOQZqECS
I need her. 775Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuf4weLL1zL
A blonde approaches me, Karen, I think. Fuck, I don't know. Who cares. She pushes her arms up in an attempt to display more of her tits and any other time, I would have been interested.775Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTraN6Ttryu
It's feels like that was another life. Everything feels so different now.775Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡX5iNPKFjqv
"Hey Ben." She says my name like it's supposed to mean something, but I couldn't care less about what she wants.775Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTujqbmYNQw
Oh shit, I think I may have fooled around with her before. Maybe?775Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpkZ9AbyWdp
"Hey, sorry, I gotta go. See you around." I stand quickly without a plan of where to go, but I figure I can hide from everyone in my room. 775Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2ocjDtmHPy
Even her.775Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJVLdR29CCQ
I close the door, locking everyone out and stumble to my bed in the dark. Shit, I drank too much trying to ignore the girl across the room. 775Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxN7dR0a2sl
I feel something strange as I lay down...775Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpAasU0i6JY
I'm not alone. Fuck! Who the hell is in my bed?775Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTbt2R8264Z
"Ben?" I hear her groggy voice and instantly relax. 775Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡC6Igmryqrn
"Kat? What the fuck? You scared the hell out of me!" Why is she in my bed? Was she sleeping?775Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrzpluxMUlh
"What are you doing here?" Her confusion coming through her scratchy voice.775Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPe9FJJ5lai
"What do you mean? In case you forgot, this is my room." I'm too amused to be irritated. 775Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡD1OrA7aupX
"Oh." She seems to realize where she's at. 775Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVWmwtIkpo3
"Oh." I chuckle. God, she's so fucking adorable.775Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2YMJnA6nCE
"Sorry." I can hear the embarrassment in her voice and even though I can't see her in the dark, I know she's blushing. 775Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnHC7Gp5KLr
She moves, in a hurry to get up and probably run away from the asshole that I am. I need to make her stop. I don't want her to leave.775Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhyDkYw1pD8
"What are you doing in here, Kat?" I hope my question will be enough of a reason to stay at least a few minutes longer. 775Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdkwxBS6G7l
It's not. 775Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6hXLYeGQ6b
She stands up quickly, just as a crash sounds through the room. 775Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpRlZGKbxNu
"Oh shit! Ben, I think I knocked something over." I can hear her scurry around, feeling for whatever it was.775Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhxnrjpmz7k
I laugh. Nothing in my room is that important. "Don't worry about it, Kat."775Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjVpJU3tAve
"Don't worry about it?!? I'm pretty sure there's broken glass down here!" She's frantically feeling around. She's going to get herself hurt.775Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0dVfnkThAK
"That's all the more reason to not feel around in the dark. Seriously, Kat. It's fine. Stop before you hurt yourself." I hear her sigh, but she stops her movement. 775Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMOyRO66l9y
"Now, tell me. What were you doing laying in my bed? Not that I'm complaining." Shit, that last part wasn't supposed to come out.775Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡm7IwuzRSss
I feel the bed sink next to me as she sits down. "I just needed to... get away."775Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡioKpSIXaWf
"I know the feeling." I sigh. What I don't say is I was mostly trying to get away from her.775Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEfzw8rmAUp
"You do? You know what it feels like for all you friends to be in happy relationships and worried about you and your sad pathetic life?" She lets out a huff. Damn. I was not expecting that.775Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCUUy9otwWj
"Uh... Yes?" She gives a humorless chuckle and I can just see her eyes rolling. "Well, I mean, I kinda do. Actually. I guess I just never thought about it like that before."775Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡB5xg539li0
"Oh." Well, that shut her up, which would usually be a good thing, but I'm not sure what the fuck to say.775Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡB0IVrCTpyD
I decide to use this moment to beg for her forgiveness. "Listen, I just want to say, I am really sorry. For everything. I know you're not a fan of starting over, but do you think maybe you could forgive me?"775Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3yX0JJMq3m
She scoffs. "Oh please, like its that easy. You don't even mean that."775Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxClfX5zpxP
"I do too. More than anything. What can I do to make it up to you?" I would do just about anything she asks, I just hope she does forgive me.775Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvZ0ePQWZWQ
"Nothing. There's nothing... at... all... Wait! I have an idea." I can hear the smile in her voice. Oh shit, why do I feel so nervous?775Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPn6KpoZVkE
She keeps talking, not waiting for my response. "Okay! Just hear me out before you say anything. Okay?"775Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJUgCGYJIgE
Again, I couldn't get a word in before she barrels on. "Okay. So, I think we should date."775Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYdjPlaR3mc
I can't stop the sound that erupts from my chest. It's somewhere between a laugh and a choking sound. I'm so in shock that my body has broken.775Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbAMpUDjSPX
"I-uh... You-what?" Words. What are words? 775Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhHhHfg36ts
"Okay, before you shut me down." I wasn't going to. "It's not real. We can just pretend to date."775Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCdlo2PCVM7
"Why the fuck would we do that?" Okay, now I'm really confused.775Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBK8uydtx1E
"Because I really need this. And you said anything!" She throws my words back in my face.775Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPKGBvEMv5f
I groan and rub my hands down my face. What the fuck did I just get myself in to? 775Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2x6Im7k9L5
"Okay, okay. Just give me a minute... to... to..." To what? What the fuck is there to think about? I can't say no. "Just give me a minute to process... all of this."775Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiSELOMD8fP
"Sure, take your time." I feel her shift on the bed as she lays down. 775Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBsnmvWuKGo
"Make yourself at home." I half joke, because I honestly don't mind her laying in my bed.775Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9wMtE2Fnmm
She just giggles, stretching out to get comfortable. Damn. I really missed that sound. 775Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡj8QgDT4UrN
I missed everything about her.775Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡz1WPHKOK7U
I'm going to have to do this. Pretend to be with the girl that I can't stop thinking about. 775Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeYDjiiK8OH
Shouldn't be too hard to fake feelings, it's the keeping them fake part that's going to be a struggle. 775Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWRUqHgGyMF
"Why exactly do you need this?" I have a right to know why we are doing this, don't l?775Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡw0WHMH7uC4
She sighs. "Does it really matter?" 775Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBjgpJoIDve
"Before I agree to your crazy scheme, I need to know why we are doing it in the first place." Why can't it just be real? Of course, I don't say that out loud because I'm a huge pussy.775Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJziUAaefQh
"Okay, fair enough. Everyone has been treating me like I'm fragile since the whole... you know... happened." I lay down next to her on my back.775Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡo5kvKlLy4D
"The whole you know?" I'm completely confused. What the fuck is she talking about? 775Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡX4dFpk2Z9T
"You know... New Year's Eve?" She sounds embarrassed, but I still don't understand.775Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQLQwWTcp4w
"Why would they treat you differently because of that?" Maybe I'm missing something?775Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡe2ZUEYrdcx
"Uh... because of... what happened... with you." Shit. This is all because of me? 775Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYUOj7YrqQw
"Oh... I didn't... I didn't know." I can't believe she has been struggling and it's all my fault.775Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSNNK8fvzxS
"So uhm... Yeah... They act like I'm going to break, so I'm sick of being pitied and worried about and I just want to be normal... And you can help with that. Two birds, one stone. You know?"775Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJOrqvPE04Q
"Uh, am I the birds or the stones here?" I chuckle. She's so weird sometimes. 775Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOJwLBVGR9x
She laughs. "Well, I guess the stone."775Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjnbx5uVrQ9
"Okay, so what are the birds?" I'm barely able to hold my laughter in to get the sentence out.775Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡma1Bt8LXPW
"Wait. No. That's wrong. You're a bird!" She sounds excited, like she's made a huge discovery or something.775Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqmy6btYAta
"So... I'm a bird now?" Seriously... She is the most adorable person I know.775Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4peBldQINn
"Okay, everyone is worried about me because they think you broke my heart or whatever. So, bird one is you. And everyone pities me because I'm single. So, being a pathetic loser is bird two."775Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdc1IQ78VTb
I turn on my side to face her. "You are not a pathetic loser." Completely ignoring the fact she said I broke her heart.775Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡy4IJgySW4R
"I most certainly am. That's why I need this. If I can just throw the stone of our fake relationship at the birds, everything will be okay." Exhaustion fills her voice as she turns to face me. 775Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8gAILreGMb
I can't help but notice we are only inches apart. I can feel her breath on my face. If I leaned forward a fraction of an inch, our noses would be touching. 775Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjE36z9XyQO
Shit. This is bad. 775Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUwxsdZGSTy
Faking it is going to be so hard. 775Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ67d6qsI969
"So... What do you say, Little Birdie? You in?" Her laugh echoing into the core of my being, reverberating and filling my chest.
I find her hand and pull it to my face, placing a kiss on it. "Let's throw that rock."775Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0SG3UMh01i
I am so fucked.
ns3.15.226.150da2
