媽子教落！925Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFwKbuCTh0B
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太極，四兩撥千斤———925Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHFXJnUzTfJ
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「講你都唔知架喇表叔，不過只係小小無名BAND 1 archi firm姐，反而我想問下令孃讀完anthropology，家陣高就何方，我記得阿婷當初仲好似要俾人term咁濟？」925Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡt8dw14LKOF
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有望過下阿婷IG既我知道佢自從去左外國後日日都群埋鬼佬做偽abc，可惜樣同身材都麻麻既佢只係成為鬼佬玩物，仲因為走堂同fuck grade差啲出事。925Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1hEAPjsvii
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「哼，我地自己有搞生意賣衫，仲要生意太好，婷婷家陣特登番黎幫我地手咋！」表叔反駁道。925Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8MY53JUzoU
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「讀完咁多年書番去賣衫？咁點解唔一開始直接幫手呢？」我強忍笑意。925Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRV3pVDkMua
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「你理得我個女呀，佢鍾意去增長下知識姐，冇話一定要做番個飯呀！反而係明仔你呀，有女朋友喇而家，幾時準備落地生根？」表叔母笑問，有古怪。925Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8I1c9uGd57
925Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUH9XZW3x8g
「我地未有咁快考慮住呢啲野。」我以靜制動、以不變應萬變。925Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡG4MwRiHolB
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「岩既，你父母成世人先供得層細樓仔，夠你住呀，定夠佢地住呢？」表叔母居然用出最狠毒既「有冇樓攻擊」，仲要帶埋我父母黎鬧。925Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdrFkrfvJ1e
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「邊個話一定要置業！老豆媽子已經俾左足夠好既野我，供我讀書俾飯我食，養到我咁高大威猛、英明神武已經令我好滿足！我以後有需要既野，我會靠自己對手搵番黎，唔係人人都要靠父母架，走佬走到用哂父母儲左一世既錢！」對方用狠手段，我都唔會留手，盡情還擊。925Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrn2yUtfDBd
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「哼，算！夏蟲不可語冰。你地班港豬咪再屈係呢個蝦毛咁大既地方自己爽，我地出面大把世界。」表姨母自行定結論，完全唔理岩先俾人講中既痛腳。925Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKpBguanCjt
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「我地係香港人又點？呢到係我地屋企黎架，有問題唔係移左民就會自動解決架，許冠杰歌仔都有唱呀！不過你地鍾意做二等公民既話都冇人會反對既，但唔好拉埋哂我地所有人落水！」Tiffany握住我既手反擊道，兩人齊心合力。925Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdiZx8MdudM
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係外國既華人地位有時比起黑人仲要低，其實如果唔係個每日個一百五個「來賓」，有邊個香港人想走佬？去到一個全新既地方生活，失去一班可以聯繫既朋友，失去平日既慣常生活？925Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡj9FR9DFHE6
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「岩呀，到底咩心態先會明明係香港出世、成長、結婚、生埋仔，但都仲會日日係到唱淡香港，唱衰自己屋企？點解會有呢種不忠、不孝、不慈既人呢？」我用鋒利既眼光怒視表叔母。925Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡq0SF5M8FYY
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一切已成定局！925Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡu628d6BpBk
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「呀！！！你個仆街仔，對住長輩都咁冇禮貌，有爹生冇乸教，兩個窮鬼廢柴老豆老母先教到你條咁既食屎狗咋！食屎狗！！！」表叔母疑似俾我笑到面都青還擊唔到，居然直接講哂粗口，仲疑似俾港板分裂三入面既劉馬車上左身咁。925Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡao05jmOkD6
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媽子聽到表叔母呢一下low quality既攻擊，終於忍唔住向前踏上一步。925Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkHHE4LhJfW
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我第一次感覺到呢一種氣——925Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZmw71oxIDR
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表叔表情好似有啲怕。925Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ79bXNMgoJR
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「你．．．你想點呀！我．．．我數臭你！」表叔母向後退左一步。925Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnEklTXvRjR
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「你你你，你咩你！唔洗你數臭我，我自己數臭我自己。我十二歲死老豆，十三歲就輟學打工，十四歲就離家出走，十五歲就同人私定終生，十六歲就已經學識潑婦罵街，當初你老公見著我走都走唔切呀！」925Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjg5pRezK5U
925Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡe04FcfWtfH
媽子居然搞過咁大龍鳳。925Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡx4DWerwIyt
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「你．．．你！！」925Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡa9rj7EZgNI
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「你咩你！你人又老，錢又冇，移完民都仲要走佬！」媽子口速點解可以咁快！？925Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVl1zcqXGJX
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只見媽子打開iphone，佢一早係個screen cap左張圖。925Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIKSSzZBuky
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「知唔知呢啲咩字呀！」925Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUiPqfUtkX9
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「功．．．成．．．不必在我！」表叔母照住字讀。925Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5BRPDVpEys
925Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡL2fpeBGTw8
「錯呀！係你在必不成功呀！失敗呀你！！！」媽子怒嚎一聲，狀若獅子怒吼驚壓四座。925Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLA5KTwu9VJ
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「阿，我唔聽呀！」表叔母轉身高舉兩手掩耳。925Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡO7cAPB6KJL
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「你做人唔精，做鬼唔靈，投胎做個菠蘿丁！」媽子指住佢黎屌。925Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfWTPgIrk2T
925Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡy861EQ4kR8
「點解呀？」食緊花生既親戚們問道。925Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7NoeHtbzRz
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「起完俾人撇囉～」925Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIOmdT4xXbd
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「呀！！！」表叔母狀若瘋癲，就咁飯都唔食跑左出去，而表叔一家都就此敗走，對於呢家不請自來又黑人憎既人，冇人會理佢地，就算舅公一脈既人都冇人想理佢地。925Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhDCMhIs49l
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媽子轉身望住我地拍左拍手：「挑，輕鬆！」925Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFx0umLWSze
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「不愧係當年既撚狗派小龍女．．．」我聽到大舅父細聲講。925Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7j2zQ1iG1H
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撚狗派．．．？925Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeD8oxvwAQY
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神．．．神鵰俠侶？925Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡag7FB6WWWX
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「咁邊個係楊過？」我好奇一問。925Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYaAQQ2KGe7
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「咪你老豆囉，當初你呀爸係臭飛黎架，仲要係好狼死個隻！細細個就同你呀媽私定終生呀嘛。」925Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoTdMUnDNP9
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屌，唔撚係掛？925Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡELJ30dZrcp
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望住平時聲都唔聲既老豆，以往既佢居然會係舊世代死MK。925Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjincAnj2qt
表舅一家敗走之後，大家都樂融融咁樣食飯，好似岩先嘈交既事情根本冇發生過咁。925Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ29Vsqw99nr
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用老屎忽們既講法就係——925Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡorrZ44AgaM
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咩大風大浪我未見過？97回歸、金融風暴、沙士我都經歷過哂，家陣呢啲事濕濕碎，記黎把鬼！925Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0keYOxUlZ0
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我地後生仔一枱食住飯咁，今次阿均、阿樂同埋阿茵都讓俾我起筷先，岩先成功擊退左表舅一家既我已經係大家眼中上升一個層次。925Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfRpN2jSFvT
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最少今晚會係咁先。925Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmEsnH8N8Jh
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而我則覺得岩先如果我仲補多句「敵羞、吾去脫她衣」的話，咁成個畫面會再完美少少。925Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡflCsvAMFcG
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今晚大家圍左係枱前，無分你我對錯，今日中午既唔開心都抹走左佢，Kitty坐左係Tiffany身邊兩人都可以和睦相處。925Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXfjjppOoD4
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其實只要Kitty係未來肯放低佢個種自以為是既身段，我相信大家都會接受佢。一家人，有乜隔夜仇先得架，Kitty個種女神心態咪又係俾班兵仔寵出黎，嬲尻佢都冇用架。925Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡD2IQ1mYQ80
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君不見，伍求耳機被眾屌，鹿欲利是無人罵？925Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡR9scN49qce
925Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAz5YTbAHuz
「喂，拎隻碗黎。」Tiffany突然叫停同阿均聯機轉緊珠既我。925Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡX4mgmqtNDH
925Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡubKrfQCN0D
我無視左俾我累死既阿均個對充斥住不滿既視線。925Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3XshStvoQu
925Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkin8Vv9AFm
「做乜呀～？」925Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAoCWpj6xrR
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「幫你夾魚囉，成個大細路咁剩係掛住同阿均玩。」Tiffany將魚分好，然後又幫手潷落大家既碗到。925Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUWfUM4QuDt
925Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnmpf4PaptN
「唔該哂．．．」呢種帝王式既享受，我好似咁大個仔都未試過咁。925Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBxHlmLgA2p
925Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsfTmZwaMWS
「我係你女朋友黎架嘛！食野呀，再轉我就沒收你手機！」925Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEpQ6IIJ2GY
925Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbzSVUdmKAW
我乖乖放低手機，一邊食野一邊偷雞咁望住Tiffany，佢成程都係到幫緊大家手分野夾野，可能係平時做慣左手勢，黎到家陣都鍾意serve人。925Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsEZSrXzJvM
925Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡR9qvO3MVGU
「做咩眼甘甘望住我？」Tiffany放低輕輕咬左啖既帶子。925Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiVsZVaJ8ee
925Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZi2cDpFG4y
俾佢發現左我偷望緊佢！925Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsaSuKaRXiH
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「冇野．．．咁你係我女朋友，望下你都得掛？」925Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZRyyh3bYBZ
925Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4IMwCoa6vN
「盡情望囉你！鍾意望就望夠成世喇你，唔食野餓死你呀！」Tiffany見住我又唔食野，係到笑住扮嬲。925Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrpF7bB1gbc
925Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqFWV5KPhND
「淨係望住．．．你，都望飽我喇。」唔知點解，我會咁口花花，明明以往我對住女仔九成時間都係尻笑同支吾以對，雖然都仲係有啲翹口。925Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjkUk1lMYyY
925Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8CJAbYbjLl
對於我呢番言論Tiffany好似扮聽唔到咁繼續食野，但係我見到佢好明顯咁連耳根都紅埋。925Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTUhKX0pdq7
925Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLBxfgFK5fi
「屌，食飯喇你！望乜望飽呀！」唔知阿均係對個失去左唔會番黎既五十體仲耿耿於懷，定係不滿我呢種放閃，佢夾左舊大既雞放係我碗到，阻止我繼續同Tiffany甜蜜。925Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡccg7jxUTp8
925Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4dNGeo0gsy
如果可以一直咁樣落去，你話幾好呢？925Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡO0r18HwewI
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可惜既係，晚飯既時間都特別快，七點食一食再加埋吹水，原來不知不覺間就已經到左十點半，係時候要散場。925Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGE3NIzBaEe
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亦都係我要同Tiffany講再見既時候。925Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKy1763mfhR
