向菱出教室,來到走廊上,突然就覺得南雨鎮的三月不存在春天。75Please respect copyright.PENANAP7d3OynheX
75Please respect copyright.PENANASTqn9wRdz3
據說祁小波感冒了,所以向菱那天沒有陪她出去玩。75Please respect copyright.PENANAZbDKszFdTg
75Please respect copyright.PENANA9XICJQCR9g
這事是祁澈先和她提的,那時他像是隨口一提,她點點頭,表示回應。 75Please respect copyright.PENANAIHb270zuZV
75Please respect copyright.PENANAHfNq9yYIJ3
她原本和祁小波約好要一同去公園溜滑梯的,但因為此事,也只好之後再說了。75Please respect copyright.PENANAAKFSgiLbz3
75Please respect copyright.PENANAFMAKLwoiW3
海邊小鎮的春季多雨,多雲又帶點悶熱,海浪拍打得更加兇狠,雨下得更為頻繁。75Please respect copyright.PENANApWhvJ7ww62
75Please respect copyright.PENANAW7A5WrbVls
用一個字來總結就是——躁。75Please respect copyright.PENANAFxywUS5R9k
75Please respect copyright.PENANATO1nPVNRPL
高二下學期的春天,學生們到了適合思考自己生涯的年紀。 75Please respect copyright.PENANATQwpx1JCg6
75Please respect copyright.PENANA3GZWSHo2hO
台上的教師總會在講課時有意無意地提起,同儕間偶爾也有討論,引起不少人開始規劃。75Please respect copyright.PENANA2BJ0wrBzRg
75Please respect copyright.PENANASxE3ChzTdA
楊宛和向菱聊到這個話題時,楊宛提起了她的志向。 75Please respect copyright.PENANAv4pvBf0JBY
75Please respect copyright.PENANAtOtfmpYpCV
「我故鄉那所大學的服裝設計系!」 75Please respect copyright.PENANAgoaj8zdmEV
75Please respect copyright.PENANAs0QsOM7qKt
幾個同班同學也跟著提出了各自的目標,似乎已經充滿鬥志。75Please respect copyright.PENANAwHpMamvLK4
75Please respect copyright.PENANAp7yKmT2viN
某個女同學說道:「我想去北渝市!」75Please respect copyright.PENANArWgSe3TOF0
75Please respect copyright.PENANANns4zSmTVH
另一個男同學順著她的話建議,「我也是,要不我們結伴吧?」75Please respect copyright.PENANABCCKcZIPwK
75Please respect copyright.PENANANPGj487Unf
「哈哈哈哈你們倆還真是般配——」75Please respect copyright.PENANACiPZyHfRSB
75Please respect copyright.PENANAsn5ldqlcA4
眾人笑鬧成一團,那對男女被同學們說得臉紅了。75Please respect copyright.PENANApHx5QvQhp0
75Please respect copyright.PENANADN54XuKgcW
十七、八歲的年紀,本就應該意氣風發,昂首挺胸,耀眼熱烈。 75Please respect copyright.PENANAu7xxqztkkb
75Please respect copyright.PENANAz6siELlWVe
向菱卻是在此時變得心不在焉,默默退出了討論。 75Please respect copyright.PENANAOA240Hc9nu
75Please respect copyright.PENANAVeDvJRKYBj
她一直以來,都有些迷惘。 75Please respect copyright.PENANAWpj58kO12s
75Please respect copyright.PENANAsPth4IXqn4
少女悄然離開剛才嬉鬧著的人群,沒有目標的閒晃,直到她莫名其妙地抵達了教室外稍遠偏僻的走廊。75Please respect copyright.PENANAUg034W5ZVN
75Please respect copyright.PENANAlxdXb5fOXX
那裡是安靜而沒有人煙的地方。 楊宛問了她不少關於將來的問題,她卻經常回答不上來。 75Please respect copyright.PENANAauXZhCEjkB
75Please respect copyright.PENANAZbXKCFokfT
「北渝市不錯啊,而且你已經是文學界的大人物了,感覺很有前途嘛。」75Please respect copyright.PENANA8J4iyWMPIr
75Please respect copyright.PENANAWOvQFE5Hzz
向菱不知道怎麼回應這種話。 75Please respect copyright.PENANAhbYDjX4whi
75Please respect copyright.PENANAeuwmM9iJdK
因為她當初會步入文學,只是為了躲避身後的經濟、心理壓力,她只是想遠離。75Please respect copyright.PENANAqfXvZgJreI
75Please respect copyright.PENANAZ5EpT4KqeU
那時候,鄭娟因為向里的過世而開始出現異常行為,經濟困頓,她沒有專長又未達可以打工的年紀,於是只好拿出自己的興趣。75Please respect copyright.PENANAHslYf87FaO
75Please respect copyright.PENANAcYzaqNC5q0
結果最後越走越遠,她已經看不見家庭了。75Please respect copyright.PENANA9jxmkrt6mb
75Please respect copyright.PENANABkwPpWsVDq
自那以後,她逐漸把寫故事當成了工作,而不是原先最純粹的興趣。 75Please respect copyright.PENANAbt4HEyyBkA
75Please respect copyright.PENANAq2g15VfmQe
思考大綱成為習慣,那麼提筆寫作就是例行公事。75Please respect copyright.PENANAzc7zusuCF3
75Please respect copyright.PENANAjN2RyJjXZf
她仍然喜歡文字,仍會從故事裡得到快樂,不過她好像成為了一個工作狂,也對這樣的現況感到迷惑。 75Please respect copyright.PENANAZV2gGism6B
75Please respect copyright.PENANAybyCDXixIE
向菱覺得自己還挺矛盾的,遲遲想不通。 75Please respect copyright.PENANAMGp2QvjmZW
75Please respect copyright.PENANAQgK66MbtLm
她想起前陣子,室友王曉認真問過她的話。 75Please respect copyright.PENANALA6TgTm6XX
75Please respect copyright.PENANADEs5s1ojSD
「你有想過未來嗎?」75Please respect copyright.PENANAFahZllboaQ
75Please respect copyright.PENANAsLtwLlzjGw
——怎麼想?75Please respect copyright.PENANA8fcTlr6buw
75Please respect copyright.PENANAJM425m09NP
要怎麼想,才是正確的? 75Please respect copyright.PENANAuDJFCZClW4
75Please respect copyright.PENANAjskMgzzlDD
她那時候沒有回應,只是勉強扯了扯唇角,以示附和。 75Please respect copyright.PENANAxXdIBh2Q8a
75Please respect copyright.PENANAaGaly8uztY
大家都具有計畫,擁有目標,唯有她卻像是迷路的小孩子似的,不知所措的站在交叉路口。75Please respect copyright.PENANAOBxKe392Cs
75Please respect copyright.PENANApgslbaq8yQ
向菱不知道有沒有人可以來拉她一把。 75Please respect copyright.PENANA0tjKf1im6s
75Please respect copyright.PENANAU53aH1HQwx
後來,大概又過了一段時間,文壇裡的朋友言恬,她說的話迫使少女開始直接面對另一件事。 75Please respect copyright.PENANAgv11wEDiWi
75Please respect copyright.PENANA9xTSfyaz2M
——她似乎喜歡上一個人了。75Please respect copyright.PENANAdnNZ1VfJ8q
75Please respect copyright.PENANA83PIvXt5b8
原來不知不覺間,她也抵達了,會因為學業和愛戀煩惱的年紀。75Please respect copyright.PENANAZUAwBRu0Ta
75Please respect copyright.PENANAIYMKGKBDrI
那些事讓她愈來愈困惑,無法立即下決定但又無法乾脆割捨,陷入一種無止境的內耗裡。 75Please respect copyright.PENANAFufWcYBe9J
75Please respect copyright.PENANAzDc6frjR8b
這很不像向菱以往的風格,不乾脆,而且拖泥帶水。 75Please respect copyright.PENANAzrJJCfln1U
75Please respect copyright.PENANAymOP7ubqCM
她覺得越來越看不懂自己了。 75Please respect copyright.PENANAM7FGaQ21lm
75Please respect copyright.PENANA8AjI35LZjd
_ 75Please respect copyright.PENANAGaHPFbHCGa
75Please respect copyright.PENANAdsnkhrz18w
這麼稱呼似乎有點矯情,只不過她喜歡的人……算了,還是稱呼全名吧,祁澈。75Please respect copyright.PENANAt7iEPn81m4
75Please respect copyright.PENANAPpUiFHo92T
——她喜歡的人,祁澈,從中午那節午休之後就消失了、再也沒回教室了。 75Please respect copyright.PENANAFzOIcUdeO4
75Please respect copyright.PENANAvdNlhCDfn2
這種事不是第一次發生了,下午時向菱問過沈中奕,對方一臉莫名的丟給她一句——你第一天認識祁澈嗎?75Please respect copyright.PENANAFh744s9NyA
75Please respect copyright.PENANAnnm7baJIlC
…… 話雖如此,向菱還是有一點想找他說話。75Please respect copyright.PENANASw3ZQGdiT2
75Please respect copyright.PENANAZN7ps3PCvG
放學後,她打開手機,讓螢幕畫面在對話框裡停滯,一邊思忖著她應該說些什麼。 75Please respect copyright.PENANAcL4MN2LLv5
75Please respect copyright.PENANA2aYKZ88qdd
「祁澈。」 75Please respect copyright.PENANAF54Hg8qarV
75Please respect copyright.PENANAjKMzpCDMzG
無意識的輸入了這個名字。 75Please respect copyright.PENANAHI1WcQb22a
75Please respect copyright.PENANAJBLb75qeOq
彷彿肢體比她先記住,這個人的身影。75Please respect copyright.PENANAq0p3sv71ei
75Please respect copyright.PENANAIumvrxZ3Y8
奇怪了,她又不是失戀,只是和他說話的機會減少而已,自己在發什麼神經。75Please respect copyright.PENANAxDYXJnj9zA
75Please respect copyright.PENANARVJT1hLfsL
半個下午都過得魂不守舍,難道這個人是她過活必須的能量嗎?75Please respect copyright.PENANAd9RpFgbwM2
75Please respect copyright.PENANAkVl8NqqL6V
她腹誹了一會,手動刪掉輸入框的文字,重新輸入。 75Please respect copyright.PENANAJBghP1704K
75Please respect copyright.PENANADkXn8Ytieh
——「在嗎?」不對。75Please respect copyright.PENANAagp7Tfu7hI
75Please respect copyright.PENANASbQe4CwCQu
意圖太明顯了。75Please respect copyright.PENANAy8FjKlrPqe
75Please respect copyright.PENANA1BtuVukD4y
——「你在幹麼?」也不對,這樣未免太故意了點。75Please respect copyright.PENANAVllVbdyJJc
75Please respect copyright.PENANAtL4W1zkiMg
她猶豫著要發什麼訊息,最終還是沒發,盯著那個對話框框發怔。75Please respect copyright.PENANAXy6R1XQ8gP
75Please respect copyright.PENANAear2VYOazg
幾分鐘後,向菱挪動指尖,點按幾下手機,忽然突發奇想決定給他取個名稱備註。75Please respect copyright.PENANAyDAJtHA55z
75Please respect copyright.PENANAei2ogSYH6g
指尖在空白的名稱框裡停頓了下。 75Please respect copyright.PENANA5KVZXHIIsI
75Please respect copyright.PENANALrSVgJNBq8
然後,她沒什麼猶豫的從手機鍵盤裡戳出一個「?」,想表示神秘又行蹤不明的意味。75Please respect copyright.PENANA4gZTShSivb
75Please respect copyright.PENANAJSl5cRW1kQ
三秒鐘後又迅速刪掉,默默改成了別的內容。 75Please respect copyright.PENANAEe6Je7FUfs
75Please respect copyright.PENANAmqjfaCUDG1
她怔了幾秒才按下確定按鈕,看著新備註,她突然覺得心裡樂得不行,唯一美中不足的是她有些羞恥。 75Please respect copyright.PENANAf0viwshmEe
75Please respect copyright.PENANADaMN49w03u
新備註:「我才不喜歡他」。 75Please respect copyright.PENANAMCZZjjnK4B
75Please respect copyright.PENANA3ruJo2XTiN
看著新取的備註,少女的唇角壓抑不住地往上翹。 75Please respect copyright.PENANAQFFS7WUNrF
75Please respect copyright.PENANA7tkUuJwpfb
她還在傻笑,一則新訊息突然從底部彈出,對方的訊息竟然主動來了。 75Please respect copyright.PENANABai8PrZb13
75Please respect copyright.PENANA5wHcAanbv1
祁澈極少主動找她,所以向菱有點驚訝又有點愉悅,她點擊訊息閱讀。75Please respect copyright.PENANAkbrVUEfjdM
75Please respect copyright.PENANAB5ON6uFUxC
那封簡訊,簡單直接而且很有他的風格,只有一句「在嗎」,甚至沒有附上標點符號。 75Please respect copyright.PENANAxqhfMMlMrM
75Please respect copyright.PENANAsiS7xjZqhr
向菱本來打算秒回,但突然想起言恬的話,於是便退出聊天框,刻意延遲了幾分鐘才回覆。75Please respect copyright.PENANA2Jl7QrvT8w
75Please respect copyright.PENANAG0kgNaEt2z
……意義不明的舉動,大概只有這麼傻的人才幹得出來。75Please respect copyright.PENANACA0nbUI0rA
75Please respect copyright.PENANAE3NOapsPLr
向菱:「在。」75Please respect copyright.PENANApgnNR0ny3X
75Please respect copyright.PENANATDkpvlF9Yy
突然有些好奇對方給她取什麼備註。 75Please respect copyright.PENANAEGvoUT4EMC
75Please respect copyright.PENANAJVEcrSKRra
對面的訊息停頓了幾秒,像是在斟酌怎麼開始,然後才發送過來:「你在男生宿舍嗎。」75Please respect copyright.PENANAEC1GnGFr3Z
75Please respect copyright.PENANA301HpW7x6P
教室換座位之後,向菱還是經常找祁小波玩耍,熟悉之後變得像姊妹一般親暱。75Please respect copyright.PENANAxwIKBHMFV6
75Please respect copyright.PENANAS9Y3enqMoI
——只是,她很少在宿舍碰到祁澈。75Please respect copyright.PENANAEHLrZkKgdi
75Please respect copyright.PENANAo3UJZkJwxq
想想也對,他似乎極為頻繁的打工。記得某天她路過魚市,碰見他在那裡幫忙一個老人將新鮮的魚隻裝進大袋子。75Please respect copyright.PENANA9o5UtCvNAi
75Please respect copyright.PENANA4j1RC7v7hn
她知道他每天固定蹺掉的那節午休,都是去給祁小波帶飯的,但這不為其他人知道。75Please respect copyright.PENANAtNrjnj62rS
75Please respect copyright.PENANAWNggbOe7lj
向菱回覆:「祁小波感冒了啊,你早上說的,所以我今天沒過去。」75Please respect copyright.PENANAFBzmHvF5DU
75Please respect copyright.PENANAqDN9ADw0KO
「怎麼了嗎?」她敲下這行,然後送出。 75Please respect copyright.PENANAMx1DKz0kbx
75Please respect copyright.PENANAaDKg1mBe0w
訊息傳送到網路彼端,很快已讀,接著對方的文字沒幾秒又傳過來,「明天也別去那裡。」75Please respect copyright.PENANAX5Onc9m0tR
75Please respect copyright.PENANAGu669NqXha
——向菱不懂他的意思。 75Please respect copyright.PENANAUOsnq4MYw0
75Please respect copyright.PENANAcVU9Xs0TLC
她用一隻手指戳出單個符號:「?」75Please respect copyright.PENANAW5nVj2yH1K
75Please respect copyright.PENANAYpMweVa4kL
這一次,祁澈的訊息許久沒有傳來回覆,久到她差點以為他網路掉線了。75Please respect copyright.PENANA0DXHQpWo99
75Please respect copyright.PENANA7Sjo6WCf0V
從以前到現在,還是第一次出現這種情況。75Please respect copyright.PENANAgRDROApflX
75Please respect copyright.PENANAUH4G07ws01
她常和祁小波玩,他沒阻止過。她經常去男生宿舍遛達,和小女孩一起亂翻他的東西,他也沒拒絕過。75Please respect copyright.PENANAxBHsbXZthP
75Please respect copyright.PENANAvIzMetDlxN
向菱有點錯愕,心想這人的態度轉換得有些過快。 75Please respect copyright.PENANAcpIqTw76Bh
75Please respect copyright.PENANARpW4yUPdda
她故作玩笑的發送,「你是被盜號了?」 75Please respect copyright.PENANA47jH7kyq2E
75Please respect copyright.PENANAIPfmkpLX6a
「沒。」否認得倒還挺快。 75Please respect copyright.PENANAQCxIrExj1O
75Please respect copyright.PENANAAYpo0jahei
「那是怎麼了?我和小波約好明天要去公園盪鞦韆的。」 75Please respect copyright.PENANAzFKEecNare
75Please respect copyright.PENANAAlctcquR6A
「抱歉。」 75Please respect copyright.PENANALpG86qeNNp
75Please respect copyright.PENANAttAWtmmJON
少女打字的手驀地僵住了。75Please respect copyright.PENANAh9C85tc1wh
75Please respect copyright.PENANArMKGD377R4
其實她的第一反應是——這傢伙居然會道歉啊?真稀奇。75Please respect copyright.PENANAU82ePIgqhL
75Please respect copyright.PENANA9iVjhRrttA
緊接著她的思緒是這樣運轉的:等一下,他真的在道歉嗎?靠,好像是認真的,不對,他幹麼道歉?75Please respect copyright.PENANAEXtWeOpVht
75Please respect copyright.PENANA5uDRoEYioq
為什麼要和她說抱歉?75Please respect copyright.PENANAY8HovQm460
75Please respect copyright.PENANAXUcEOeLGBg
一瞬間,她的腦子像是過載了,運轉不過來,甚至倏地空白。 75Please respect copyright.PENANAekfsFKq1Oo
75Please respect copyright.PENANALazadsReNf
這算什麼,變相拒絕還是撇清關係? 75Please respect copyright.PENANAZCjwNaNZ8F
75Please respect copyright.PENANAv6PRwxFJ6z
她首先聯想到的是電視上的八點檔連續劇。75Please respect copyright.PENANASL2EMG8yAI
75Please respect copyright.PENANA5UyuZolIEa
對不起我們不要再打擾彼此了、就這樣結束吧、再這樣下去也不會有結果……為什麼她滿腦子都是這種沒梗的俗濫台詞。75Please respect copyright.PENANAKj0onTZBP9
75Please respect copyright.PENANApvAUirzEVo
突然就慌亂了起來。75Please respect copyright.PENANASE7k3qpELF
75Please respect copyright.PENANAHaIc2s0xT5
但是喜歡一個人的心思,本來就是很敏感的,她知道自己反應不應該這麼大,因為一句抱歉。 75Please respect copyright.PENANAGXjIZfUFf2
75Please respect copyright.PENANAMOGzyVdJRJ
又或者因為失去了一種可能「巧遇」他的機會。75Please respect copyright.PENANAEHNU96SayB
75Please respect copyright.PENANA1vF2FVGizO
少女開始胡思亂想,腦袋一團暴亂。 75Please respect copyright.PENANA1v5dOfqcZh
75Please respect copyright.PENANA8WX0XX3aGo
難道他已經意識到她的喜歡,於是決定開始疏遠她了嗎? 75Please respect copyright.PENANAnsof8OdY8O
75Please respect copyright.PENANAePJl3sxqMy
她陷入一種莫名的恐慌裡,像是憑空懸浮於半空中,踩不到地板,像是失重。 75Please respect copyright.PENANAhy2NARd6oc
75Please respect copyright.PENANAdBC2pila8O
這種感覺,一點都不踏實。 75Please respect copyright.PENANAnmTbzeHUuT
75Please respect copyright.PENANA7EP9pXAByL
_75Please respect copyright.PENANAlJ7MIpOAWb
75Please respect copyright.PENANAAOdFxiCbfC
窗外陰雨綿綿,烏雲潛伏在暗色裡,連消失都悄然無聲。75Please respect copyright.PENANA5f68iTakCO
75Please respect copyright.PENANAfXeiKsE18y
隔天是周休,但向菱絲毫開心不起來。75Please respect copyright.PENANATY6z0EHJ95
75Please respect copyright.PENANAVGROdnK1Hi
她一旦變得鬱悶,就經常直接倒頭就睡,因為現實讓她覺得很累,睡眠做夢反倒是最好的去處。75Please respect copyright.PENANAjTOBad3iG3
75Please respect copyright.PENANAiDwZzkOhHb
室友們見慣了她假日睡長覺的習慣,都見怪不怪,放輕了動靜,不驚擾到少女。75Please respect copyright.PENANA9waBHJttho
75Please respect copyright.PENANADV5GVBdAb2
她睡得比平時更晚了一點。75Please respect copyright.PENANACFjEihjoaZ
75Please respect copyright.PENANA4w88R0rM1a
下午起床時,她覺得胃臟空得發慌,腳步沉重虛浮,囫圇拆了幾包糖果餅乾了事。 75Please respect copyright.PENANACoCQdqeQXK
75Please respect copyright.PENANA4eealparoP
過了一小段時間,向菱才打起精神訂外賣。75Please respect copyright.PENANA0uUmikIPgO
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簡單而隨便的向室友們打了招呼,她覺得自己的話音有氣無力。 75Please respect copyright.PENANAtnSyG40qh3
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半小時後,她坐在床上吃著外賣便當,一邊打開手機給言恬發訊息。75Please respect copyright.PENANA0jZIivy6Bh