表叔一家人當年係家族入面都算係令人聞風喪膽既恐怖人物。797Please respect copyright.PENANAfJzCnmWaBq
797Please respect copyright.PENANAvMkZepcKog
要講番佢地既威水事蹟實在太多不能盡錄,但只可以講既係,有佢地呢家四口出現既地方,一定會寸草不生。797Please respect copyright.PENANAME2vcYfcuh
797Please respect copyright.PENANAKwAbAyavC0
當你以為人地問你有冇女朋友,月入幾多已經夠mean,夠哂hardfeeling個時,表叔母已經係進化到問你幾時請飲,有冇樓。咁樣其實咪同細舅母差唔多level姐?797Please respect copyright.PENANAnYlIusHato
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錯呀!!!797Please respect copyright.PENANAqXuJaXo3sS
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細舅母只會對住我地呢班近親先會咁口多,但係呢家人係咩人面前都會咁樣唔理人地感受,最恐怖既一點係佢地永遠會搵地方踩到你。797Please respect copyright.PENANAZbcAwRUUJq
797Please respect copyright.PENANA1So9qLVJHW
仲記得當初阿均成功入到醫學院時姨丈係大既家族group到報喜,但係當人人都係到恭喜前、congra後時,呢個時候表叔母居然會打句「做醫生第日實搵好多喇」黎破壞個氣氛。797Please respect copyright.PENANAoLmbANOFrY
797Please respect copyright.PENANAuX5V0DvhX1
然後每次家族聚會時佢都會私底下同其他遠房係到講阿均成家人都係勢利眼,咁高分就只係識揀醫黎讀,淨係識向錢看。797Please respect copyright.PENANARzHOYwkKzw
797Please respect copyright.PENANA93lGihrnVM
但佢卻唔知道阿均當年係睇完醫龍而去選擇讀bio,然後咁多年苦讀只係為左做一次龍太郎。我仲記得當年阿均中二病到成日袋甜品係衫,想要盡力咁樣復原呢個角色,結果而家成為左唔可以提既黑歷史。797Please respect copyright.PENANA0QUONvnCRV
797Please respect copyright.PENANAlr5X8Psm4J
而當佢個大女係佢拆磨之下辛苦考入到UCL之後,佢地更加會肆無忌憚咁大聲講:「港大醫學院有咩咁叻呢,有能力既緊係去外國讀名牌大學喇。」797Please respect copyright.PENANAWuLB3YVNdB
797Please respect copyright.PENANAQ4aVNbkVsZ
另外,佢地個細仔當初辛苦咁俾佢地逼入喇沙之後佢地就不時係到撩事鬥非,周圍同親戚問長問短要起人底,所有band1非名校既中學係佢地眼中都會顯得低賤。直到佢踩中讀緊皇仁既表哥同埋st paul男女既表妹,先肯停手。797Please respect copyright.PENANAT8nCVacOSo
797Please respect copyright.PENANApuO9nyjUEt
仲有當初表妹小心咁收埋既地底情唔小心俾佢地個女係中央溫書時撞破,阿姨同姨丈都未嬲,表叔同表叔母就已經唱通街,講到單純既puppy love好似好淫亂既一件事,有必要大叫一聲「成何體統」咁樣。個時甚至加鹽加醋到話連初吻都未失既表妹已經失左身,撞破既地點由中央變左做賓館門口。797Please respect copyright.PENANAfLBiWMrBgB
797Please respect copyright.PENANAUYOnLXrjGf
記得阿姨初頭聽完嬲到想同佢地嘈交,但係俾姨丈叫停先放低件事。797Please respect copyright.PENANA3tS4AnM9Do
797Please respect copyright.PENANA38xGHFp8Uf
「隻狗咬你,唔通你又要咬番隻狗轉頭?」平時唔多講野既姨丈語出驚人,或者就係佢呢種態度先令佢可以咁成功。797Please respect copyright.PENANAodLH8DunIE
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而我地卻唔知道個時表叔連續幫公司失去左幾大客戶,到底同呢件事有冇關。797Please respect copyright.PENANAcCrFHDwTUx
797Please respect copyright.PENANAcFStbpwOqk
長年累月落黎既爭執使到表叔一家人就已經同婆婆呢一脈有上牙齒印,佢地咁多年黎都唔會放過攻擊我地既機會。797Please respect copyright.PENANAF3qP7AvylI
797Please respect copyright.PENANAIFxoKETlzB
不過對象都慢慢由難對付既大舅一家、細舅母一家同姨丈一家轉到我身上。797Please respect copyright.PENANAXshBSjrZcQ
見到好似死神咁樣行緊埋黎準備要收割我生命既表叔同表叔母,我心入面有啲不安。797Please respect copyright.PENANAXPJmHsAuKo
797Please respect copyright.PENANANqZdYlY626
一直以黎媽子同老豆對我都係實行緊呢一套放牧式育兒法,好記得老豆當初同我講溫室小花唔襟撞,要我學識一個人去闖下,唔可以成日靠沙維小白。797Please respect copyright.PENANAehamstC0o3
797Please respect copyright.PENANAl7w5sOx88O
但係老豆呀,波呢樣野不嬲都係十一條友踢架喇,家陣你要我一個人落場,我真係難啲以寡敵眾呀呢。797Please respect copyright.PENANA9u5yZ6AJ64
797Please respect copyright.PENANAjL16Pys0xU
我拋出求救既眼神,老豆同媽子互相對望之後都係冇踏上前打救我。797Please respect copyright.PENANA9q0rfe7nhs
797Please respect copyright.PENANAVbD2y50QYN
正當呢個時候,手心傳來一陣溫暖。797Please respect copyright.PENANAtyn5Pt3x5K
797Please respect copyright.PENANAjz80PqW6XH
好似感覺到我既不安,Tiffany本來同我虛握緊既手突然間捉實左我,我感覺佢我地兩人既手指交疊,十指緊扣。797Please respect copyright.PENANA8RbgMswVoH
797Please respect copyright.PENANAPzqhK56Irq
我望一望身邊既佢,Tiffany兩隻圓滾滾既雙目望住我:「有我陪你。」797Please respect copyright.PENANAlZdQ096FO3
797Please respect copyright.PENANA7z1zyRZP1P
「仔,記唔記得老豆當初教你踢波既口訣。」呢個時候,老豆突然插把口。797Please respect copyright.PENANAhLGFl558j3
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咁多次,我點記得呀!!!797Please respect copyright.PENANATuJzQPkYxI
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然後我望到老豆身邊既媽子突然用手作勢,畫左個圓形。797Please respect copyright.PENANAXDmbAlavo5
797Please respect copyright.PENANARq50jJyMRg
屌!!!797Please respect copyright.PENANAZI7Vnc9Sbo
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你地要幫我既話,唔該俾提示俾明顯啲呀大佬!!!797Please respect copyright.PENANA7mSfbiW7FM
797Please respect copyright.PENANAKqgr7cbCd5
「麥包最叻係咩?」老豆好似冇眼睇,直接係到點明我。797Please respect copyright.PENANA6woh1KyFFB
797Please respect copyright.PENANA7Wtr5y4GRC
然後我見到媽子好似覺得我好冇悟性咁樣低左低頭,佢心入面一定係諗緊:「如果唔係阿雅係到,我都賴得幫你搵番幾分面子。」797Please respect copyright.PENANAejIt7ckyNO
797Please respect copyright.PENANALxqwkVtaWl
媽子個手勢隱若間好似畫緊個圖示咁...圓中間分兩邊?797Please respect copyright.PENANAXLoelFmLCl
797Please respect copyright.PENANAfcpfbXb2vp
「快,屈速!太極,借力打力!」我腦海入面突然出現左呢幾隻字。797Please respect copyright.PENANAFpKoNUHkbd
797Please respect copyright.PENANA33NhkV2hKQ
有了——797Please respect copyright.PENANAKZ6LxzykyE
呢個時候我已經明白左老豆同媽子想要我做既事。797Please respect copyright.PENANAmKwHcXBSsy
797Please respect copyright.PENANAOKYzRAU08X
天下武功,無堅不摧,唯快不破。797Please respect copyright.PENANAIMXdPSnAmP
797Please respect copyright.PENANAtYCqnzzRBu
我地呢一房所有親戚都凝神屏氣咁望住我,準備睇我點樣應對佢地。797Please respect copyright.PENANAYdtACwE80X
797Please respect copyright.PENANALpoUZtTRoL
正當表叔同表叔母行埋我面前時,只見係佢地出口前我已經先發制人:「噫~~乜呢四位唔係就係表叔、表叔母、你地個女阿婷同阿輝咩!咁齊人番黎探我地呀,食唔慣英國米,屙壞肚呀?」797Please respect copyright.PENANAsMMjjtynNl
797Please respect copyright.PENANAvoroE32io5
「食就一定食得慣架喇,我地血統入面天生就係Britishhhh~~~唔似你咁有住野蠻人既血脈!」阿婷答道。797Please respect copyright.PENANACbv2pY8x8J
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表叔先派出兩個仔女先打頭陣。797Please respect copyright.PENANA0CHc2C8E1c
797Please respect copyright.PENANAT0Qy06u0l4
「唔係呀,我記得阿輝仔係97年7月1打後先出世架,不過其實血統就唔關咩年份出世既事,呢啲野關遺傳事既。」我望一望表叔同表叔母。797Please respect copyright.PENANAm5ECwjkO9h
797Please respect copyright.PENANAK6ZPFolEDy
「你...你...你——!」阿輝本來想還拖,但係發現自己根本駁唔到,因此佢直接用聲東擊西。797Please respect copyright.PENANAPDZCsqQzLv
797Please respect copyright.PENANAgKivGiM6Rc
「你你你你,冇名你叫架?你漏口我地唔會怪你,畢竟唔係你既錯,但係你漏口又要出黎獻醜就係你既錯。」我義正詞嚴咁對住阿輝講。797Please respect copyright.PENANAAy4eZH2CQA
797Please respect copyright.PENANAd7dXcvF4d8
「阿...家...家姐,佢...佢蝦...蝦我!」年紀未到十八既阿輝用左小朋友最慣用既退場方式。797Please respect copyright.PENANAk3JH3s5Ado
797Please respect copyright.PENANALEeUX9wOpn
「算喇,其實食唔飽冇力講野都會有咁既後果。唔係喇,你地係咪連米都冇得食所以先番黎?」797Please respect copyright.PENANAvXZpvXXRp8
797Please respect copyright.PENANAK2USqrHjsv
如果係外國撈到風生水氣佢地鬼會捨得番黎咩,貪香港租貴定係污染指數越黎越高定係租金就黎去到全球第一呀?797Please respect copyright.PENANANcLTSsfLyb
797Please respect copyright.PENANAQGmmGo0gRg
「你就冇得食,我地餐餐大魚大肉呀!」憤怒既阿婷反咬一口。797Please respect copyright.PENANAiOq5Jp99Bm
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「我都睇得出既,你個樣同個look話左俾我知喇。」797Please respect copyright.PENANANOFqmkUoIK
797Please respect copyright.PENANA0a0Zr6xmxz
我遮遮口笑道:「估唔到去左外國之後,你都依舊係著番大碼,不過今次係鬼婆大碼咁解喇!」797Please respect copyright.PENANAPaDxyaEi3Q
797Please respect copyright.PENANATi8UrTy7XA
「阿!!!」一擊分生死,阿婷同阿輝直接俾我擊倒退場。797Please respect copyright.PENANADAWZMn4P7S
797Please respect copyright.PENANAz9WTSF8AHJ
我冇用任何一隻粗口就已經可以將佢地嚇退,除左要多謝Tiffany俾我既勇氣,更加要多謝台服英雄聯盟咁多位玩家教識我鬧人既技巧。797Please respect copyright.PENANAkGiuguFjp7
797Please respect copyright.PENANAEqndskXP8U
呢個時候表叔同表叔母意識到唔多對路,呢個明仔比起五年前要強得太多,唔知佢到底經過咩事?797Please respect copyright.PENANAMeYepJFW3i
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哼,我笑左笑。797Please respect copyright.PENANAug9f4BbwwN
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佢地係唔會明白我既經歷,我英雄聯盟既成就唔係好似普通人咁打排位升分衝鑽石,我係可以連鑽石積分都唔要,只要人地一開口問我屋企人,我就會企定定係到同佢討論人生討論到榮譽等級歸零既人。797Please respect copyright.PENANAwSwhsMwjAO
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除此而外,係建築業打混左成年,我已經慢慢學識左更多更高層次既攻擊手段,係工作中向每一位senior學習,佢地都有自己一套獨特既mean人方式,有別於地盤工友個直黎直去既放狗咬人式屌人,坐係office既每一位senior都係一條毒蛇——797Please respect copyright.PENANAlkV1p7iNQS
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不屌則已,一屌驚人。797Please respect copyright.PENANA1H1uJ9BG2U