Chapter Theme Music: Inevitable Retribution ~ Solar Empire OST102Please respect copyright.PENANAX5W7j4lBg4
<06/27/2011 - 17:00 | 1010 Link Street, Marietta, GA, USA>
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Despite where I landed last week, I managed to keep the smallest spark of hope alive inside me. As the days went on, I only became more unhinged, more volatile, and more desperate for interaction. There was one more aspect to my loneliness I forgot to consider until now. During my time with Lumina, I started out trying to make new school friends, the kind I could in theory hang out with over the summers.102Please respect copyright.PENANAIyl2U5Ndjd
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Instead, as I grew more attached to Lumina, I gradually ignored the idea of having side-friends entirely. It's not just Lumina that I'm isolated from. This summer, I'm completely and totally on my own without a soul to talk to, which hasn't gone over well with how I've been handling these emotions spilling out of me.102Please respect copyright.PENANAheO6R5Rhl6
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Just going outside has become more challenging now. The very sight of the sun makes my entire body cringe from top to bottom, three times as much if I'm feeling the heat. Even that disgusting summer smell of burning asphalt sends my mind into the menacing nightmare I'm living through, over and over again.102Please respect copyright.PENANAIUfdoSq6pB
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The UAD attacks have not stopped either; they've only gotten much worse and more frequent now. A few neighbors saw me enter one when I was out on a walk the other day, and my mother and Ivan witnessed another one while I was inside the house. I'm still stuck trying to explain to them that it was only dehydration, for the sake that I'd rather summarize and lie to them about it than tell the truth. They would never understand anyway. Not one member of my family would understand most things about me, or if they did, they would never accept it at least.102Please respect copyright.PENANADaymuhqPXS
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Today however, I'm not focused on UAD. All I care about is trying to fast-forward the time by as quickly as possible. I've come up with an interesting idea to try something. Even though some small part of me couldn't stand them in the past, I'm currently trying to reach out and get in contact with some of the acquaintances that I made in my last grade. My phone was open and ready to work through calls as I stood in the blazing heat, wanting to go home while enduring the pain for the sake of privacy.102Please respect copyright.PENANANUzN4nbtN7
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I can complain all I want, but I've managed to save some of the phone numbers of the girls I hung out with in class. I may not be much of a talker, but I'll say and do anything to help get my mind away from the chaos within. Scrolling through my contacts list, the first number I dialed was Banarus. I nervously held the phone up to my ear, waiting on her to pick up.102Please respect copyright.PENANAVBnUVDmdNj
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"Hello? Who is this?"102Please respect copyright.PENANATo8yEtBual
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I knew that voice, and it was actually refreshing to hear again. "Banarus! It's me Reed."102Please respect copyright.PENANAbDIzRLcq0R
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"Reed! What's up? You never call me, so something must be up."102Please respect copyright.PENANA1we2D1XBkJ
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Without letting the phone hear it, I smacked my face into my other hand. What am I thinking? I don't know what to say! "Uh, well... I guess I just wanted to talk to someone. I mean, there are things I want to talk about?" I'm not even making sense! I'm sweating twice as much now.102Please respect copyright.PENANAoHhtrroAxr
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"Well this is weird. I've got a moment to listen, but only for a few minutes."102Please respect copyright.PENANASSVQtgTS7s
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Despite my rapid breathing, I let a single sigh through the speaker, trying to calm myself down. I know why I'm so nervous; it has nothing to do with me talking to Banarus. It's the things I want to talk about that have me so spritzed up. "You ever feel like things just don't go right in life?" Now I'm beating around the bush, but I have no choice. The one person I want to talk about is Lumina, and I can't just do that with anybody... But maybe I can.102Please respect copyright.PENANA6TWPGEn0Kp
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"You mean like with everybody every day?"102Please respect copyright.PENANAzPtcAU0pwp
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"I'm talking about complicated, stupid stuff. Things that are important, but also things I can't really get into."102Please respect copyright.PENANAaxU3iijhJn
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"I mean, if you can't talk about it, then I can't give you any advice... Look, I have important homework to do, and I'm going out to eat in an hour. I have to go."102Please respect copyright.PENANAkEQkHQ79iw
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My mouth hung open, but I didn't bother trying to stop her from hanging up. No amount of speed would have stopped her anyway. I don't know exactly what I said just now, but I'm sure I freaked her out a little... Time to try Ashly.102Please respect copyright.PENANAuPTXp7yl1t
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After another few rings I heard Ashly pick up, speaking before she could. "Hey, Ashly! How ya been? I'm calling to see if I can ask you some things or talk about other things. You got time?"102Please respect copyright.PENANAIDUbBTucDl
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"Um, I guess?"102Please respect copyright.PENANAREndXboKb4
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"Great." I'll just gradually lead into what I want to say. I don't want to sound crazy, but somebody has to know about this. I must share our story with somebody, so that I may have one to talk to about it. "It's a bit of a tough spot to start. Okay, hypothetical question first, and you don't have to be right or wrong. If you were trapped in a very hot place and wanted to be cold, and couldn't leave, what would you do? Please, give me something!"102Please respect copyright.PENANATRpdWk5Biu
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"What am I, on a game show or something? That's a random thing to call for."102Please respect copyright.PENANAgv6qHCxe2j
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"No, listen," I snapped. "I just really need help with something. I'm trying to figure out what the right thing to do is, and I don't know anymore."102Please respect copyright.PENANAGKEu0rcbVY
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"What's this about?"102Please respect copyright.PENANALm6mj95Gye
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"I don't know how to say it, I mean, it would take me forever to even try. Look, it's hard to talk about. But it's important; there are important people. Got an impossible situation. Am I making any sense?"102Please respect copyright.PENANAhysxE1dy7N
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"...I want whatever you're taking... But I'm sorry. I have to get back to what I was doing now. We'll talk about it later."102Please respect copyright.PENANAYdSlvggf8p
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I wanted to scream, yell, and wail through this phone for being ignored yet again, but I didn't argue with Ashly trying to hang up either. Just great! I can't go two seconds without sounding so nervous. I'm not sure if Lumina is actually okay or not, so it's a lot harder than normal to talk about her in any regard. Without further ado, the girl who now thinks I'm taking fun pills hung up on me as well.102Please respect copyright.PENANAwWiApwL9kk
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I'm not calling my ex, so there's only one more number to try. I once again waited for the phone to be answered, hoping I would be taken seriously this time. "Maddison."102Please respect copyright.PENANAqvw4bJqpAz
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"Is that you Reed?"102Please respect copyright.PENANA6RuEu6aNTF
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"It is." I can't be surprised she knew the number. I actually was given Maddison's number when I walked into her in the neighborhood; this neighborhood. Turns out she moved into it this year like I did, further down the road. "I had an interesting question for you." I first need to find out how a person like Maddison would take the news about such a world wonder. "What's your thought on aliens? I mean, what do you think about the whole distant life thing?"102Please respect copyright.PENANAYVHChafgcY
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"Meh. I don't know."102Please respect copyright.PENANAnYTeVBx2aS
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Way to buzz through me Maddison. I forgot she doesn't usually care about much. "You could at least try to give it thought."102Please respect copyright.PENANAaofCqemV0D
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"I'm trying to find something to watch right now. Nothing good is on today."102Please respect copyright.PENANAXvUYT3Lau8
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"Anything on there about traveling the world without any money?" I already know the answer, but I might as well ask.102Please respect copyright.PENANA1ehm6fYpuN
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"No, just dumb cartoons and stuff. I think my cat is more entertaining at the moment."102Please respect copyright.PENANAtXHMTSaYs3
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"Dammit!" I whispered my frustration into the phone, making certain Maddison would hear me... But she isn't saying anything. Not an 'Oh, what's wrong?' or 'Did something happen?' She started mouthing off about useless facts about her cat, and it made me want to barf.102Please respect copyright.PENANAjzcyJHheG4
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"You know, I'm not really having the best day."102Please respect copyright.PENANAX3goMMk1Tg
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"Sorry to hear that."102Please respect copyright.PENANAodlh1dgOB4
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I waited in more silence, expecting something else. I don't know what I was expecting, but I'm getting the vibe that Maddison could care less about a single aspect of me. "Aren't you at least curious as to why?"102Please respect copyright.PENANAt2V4L8E0xV
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"I don't know. Did you want to talk about it or something?"102Please respect copyright.PENANAm3dy3kbsww
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Did I want to talk about it? No, I only called on the phone for no stupid reason. Come on, Maddison! At least pretend to care. "It's a hard thing to talk about." That's not what I wanted to say, but I can't seem to just get it out. I wonder if other men have advice on telling people their girlfriend is an alien, though I doubt I'd find anybody like that.102Please respect copyright.PENANAP0nw1v6UaR
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"So then don't."102Please respect copyright.PENANAqhMDCmRGPb
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"Don't talk about it?" I asked the same question in my mind too, confused by the sheer stupidity of her response. I've been trying to have no part in small talk. I only want to talk about Lumina. That's the freaking reason I'm calling up all these people; to try my best, but this isn't working.102Please respect copyright.PENANANXjHiVYFLP
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"Or do. Up to you."102Please respect copyright.PENANA7UoemwAtcg
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My expression zeroed out, this time with me making the long pause. I was far from impressed, too annoyed to say anything more. Her solution is to do or don't do anything. So carefree and laidback. I can already guess what her response would be if I did reveal that secret to her. She'd shrug her shoulders and move on with her life. Some friend! I pressed the red button, causing the phone to beep and hang up. I wasn't going to answer back if Maddison did decide to figure out what happened.102Please respect copyright.PENANAFEDtyhRMf8
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Of course, minutes later as I let this fester inside me, my phone didn't buzz back. Maddison wasn't even concerned that I hung up on her, which means I rank as zero on her mind despite all the tiny little funny things we talked about on occasion. So that's it then. None of the people I hung out with have a single care about me in the world. I would have at least accepted some kind of conversation, but nobody cares. I should have never trusted them to begin with!102Please respect copyright.PENANAfzzOS1YZFl
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I was angry enough go pound sand, and my whole body was visibly shaking at what I've just learned. I've never really had any friends to begin with. They just go along to get along, ignoring me when I need someone to talk to most. Resisting the powerful urge to slam my phone to the sidewalk, I instead stared up at the clear, bright blue sky incinerating my retinas with the strong radiance. The only friend I've ever had was Lumina, but thanks to this blazing inferno, all of my powers are fully disabled. I can't speak to her until it gets cold again, and that isn't going to happen anytime soon.
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