Chapter Theme Music: New Bodhum ~ FFXIII-2 OST110Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9YbLPNlZTv
<09/13/2011 - 19:34 | Link Street, Marietta, GA, USA>
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It goes without saying that I've been extra excited and happy since the return of Lumina in my life. As I strolled down the neighborhood streets of this wonderful evening, arms behind my back with a gentle walking pace, I felt more serene than ever before. To everyone who could look upon me, they'd never know I'm walking as two people instead of one. Another full-day of cold set in through this evening, allowing me to spend another great moment with my girlfriend.110Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtIZUx4jMkd
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The view of the sky around us was most amazing! The sun was still trying to set against the horizon, casting new colors we rarely get to see. The darkening blue sky reached all the way to space without a single star visible, panning infinitely through our wonders. As the sunbeams and speckled sun spots cast their radiance on us, I cherished how well my sensitive eyes could see in the lingering brightness. "Hey Lumina? I bet you've never seen a sunset this beautiful before."110Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOgtBW3KLNf
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"Not really... I mean, I have, but I never really paid attention to it until now."110Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaLpY7aMKPT
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"It makes me wonder sometimes, what do Karnak sunsets look like? At the same time, I'm not really dying to know, with a view like this." I couldn't take my eyes away from the sun's grace. I've always hated that blinding sphere of heat, but right now, it's so gentle and docile.110Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkK8Bx9nGFA
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"Huh... Didn't I hear you utter earlier that you hate the sun for all it's done to you?"110Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPaCQIawley
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"Yeah, but it's obviously not warm now, is it? Besides..." It took me many days of reflecting to figure something else out about this planet. "I don't think that the Earth itself is an ugly looking place, at least, if we only had this exact intensity of sunlight all the time, and of course, excluding all human activity on the surface." If it were not for the people, Earth would be closer to a paradise.110Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIeJ1dRcf9o
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"So, only during sunrises and sunsets, you tolerate the view?"110Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfXNNShGi64
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How could she not? "Of course, and at night too, since I get to see all those stars. If the sun didn't rise so high every day, the weather would be perfect, visually at least. But once that sunlight gets intense, it just hurts my eyes, and scorches everything. And that's a real waste."110Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGJ6caIX4h2
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"Hm..." I wasn't sure what bored Lumina when I first came outside, but I could sense her attention shifting further through my eyes. She was taking in all the sights and sounds patiently, trying to match her breathing to mine. "It does look nice, now that I think about it."110Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwVlWHpsIO3
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"Oooooooh?!" I let a powerful grin hog my expression as I paused the walk with a hand on my lower cheek.110Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡthbNzpKsRg
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"What was that about?"110Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡI0PmhyWPLu
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All this time, I rarely get this opportunity to tease Lumina, but she's left herself wide open now! "You think the view looks beautiful – now that you think about it? Or, do you just like the view because you're here enjoying it with me?" Part of me couldn't believe what I was saying, but knowing how much Lumina loved me in return made me realize that I was more than some average guy, at least to her. I'll embarrass her any way I can, until she's blushing red in the face.110Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYeUGn4KFMp
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"Why you... Go trip on a ladybug!"110Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpiiWQdKRTO
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The scene she asked me to describe had me laughing for a few seconds, the absurdity of actually tripping my shoe over a tiny little bug.110Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvD9JYoM65y
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"When did you get smart enough to understand my feelings anyway?"110Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjk6VzFqaBI
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I knew what Lumina was asking, indirectly addressing how oblivious to her I used to be. She was in love with me from the start, yet I never realized it until she said something about it. "Since I fell in love with you, that's when." A few seconds of silence stood between us, indicating to me that my simple answer wasn't really good enough to convince her. I really have been understanding her more than I ever did before, how she feels about me in return. "For instance, when I think back on things now, there were signs that you had been falling for me for a while, even at the very beginning. I wasn't as bright back then, and was too oblivious to see it."110Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡygix4Ga9bX
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"So then you admit you were oblivious!" She's going to have to try harder than that to playfully frustrate me. "Wait, was it that obvious though? I mean, what signs was I giving off in the first place?"110Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcMKDz7Ksp5
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Isn't it amazing to realize you can easily be read like a book when you thought otherwise? "Well, the—"110Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡM8wNIkXNkg
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"And Ashly doesn't count."110Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpzkp2VGd82
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"..." It was so obvious, I wasn't even going to go there in the first place, but I'm glad Lumina realizes that her moment of jealousy was the biggest potential giveaway to her heart. "The first day we were forced together, brought into an unbreakable telepathy by the power of the purge, you fought tooth and nail to stay with me in presence. You didn't want to leave me alone, no matter what I said to you. I wondered for a long time why you were trying so hard just to hang out with me. You of course wanted to prove that you were real to me, but even when I made it clear that you were probably wasting your time, you were still content with just hanging out inside my head. Somehow, I mistook all of that for a token of friendship. But, I should have known it was really uncontrollable desire to fawn all over me. Hell, even before that moment, you broke a national Altiri law just to ensure that purge reached me. People don't do things like that for friendship, Lumina."110Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgQgr9IPcNT
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"..."110Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKqd8PQTvHz
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Her blushing silence told me that I wasn't wrong in the slightest; I had her in a vice of truth. All this time, Lumina had some kind of attachment to me, the kind that gradually grew into stronger feelings of love. Despite that, she held back how she felt all this time, afraid that I would fall for her under the wrong pretext; which she wasn't wrong to assume. "Still, Lumina, going against the entire world just for the sake of one guy? Somebody's in looooove!" I uplifted my telepathic voice while pointing imaginary holes into the air with my fingers, trying to push her buttons and get her flustered, since it's so cute.110Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkQWjfCExa1
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"If I were there, I'd slap some of that confidence off your face."110Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdBqImEFSeu
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"Oh yeah? If you were here right now, I'd wrestle my tongue through your mouth until we're both slapping each other." Why did I say that?! Why did I say that?!110Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDJjtvKcyJu
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"..."110Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFSs4KPct77
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"..." There's such an awkward silence now. I can feel Lumina struggling to speak, fumbling for words or thoughts... I don't even know where that came from. But despite how cringy it was, as I further tried to imagine it, I couldn't stop myself from laughing out loud, which was matched in perfect timing with Lumina doing the same on her own reaction. I felt so relieved that she wasn't creped out or angry at me for going that far. If anything, I started to think I was doing well for being only on my second girlfriend. I'm making up the rest as I go, forgetting all advice I had earlier on dating. I put my hands on my hips, dazzling Lumina with my confidence. "See? I told you I can be charming when I want to."110Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWNsownWuQb
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"Reed! You were a total chicken before I invited myself in!" Unwilling to let go of her keen observations, she reminded me how much I struggled with talking to girls in the past.110Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1wZOIly6cE
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She wasn't entirely wrong, but now that I thought about it, I never struggled to talk to Lumina, about absolutely anything, which I found quite interesting. "I'm not a chicken! At least, I'm not anymore. I'll do anything with you, share anything with you..." Even if it's embarrassing to give Lumina unlimited access to my mind and all of these thoughts, she's earned it. "I'm not afraid to go all the way with you. I won't even share myself with anyone else."110Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1MTp7KfzZW
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"Reed?" Lumina's voice became quite sad as I reminded her about an odd conversation we had earlier. I had decided to agree to transperation after I die, so that I'll be reborn as an Altiri living with Lumina and her sisters. But somewhere in the middle of that discussion, another aspect to my future came up. "Don't forget what I said earlier. I know that you've already decided to settle with me, but it might be too hard trying to make the two of us exclusive when both of our bodies are in opposite ends of the universe. It's really hard for me to say this, but I have to let you decide; I have to allow you that much freedom. So, if you still want to try and make your Earth life work out with somebody else, and just hang out with me on the side until you're here in person, I won't get in the way of—"110Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjYcy3xixPA
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"I said no!" I cut her off, making my earlier decision final. I'm glad Lumina has proven not to be the jealous type after all, but it's beside the point. She's already brought this up once; that earlier conversation I mentioned without getting into. We've both realized that if I give all of my heart, mind, and soul to Lumina while I'm here on Earth, the two of us would still be missing out on a lot of things. If I commit to her and never cheat, I'll never know what it's like to be kissed, or to be held, or to go any further in a physical romantic relationship. I'll never even get the chance to have kids with Lumina, not while I'm here on Earth. She realized this too, and made an offer to me that I know drilled a few holes into her psyche.110Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRtdIyDwkkR
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Her thoughts are, 'what if I just hang out with Lumina on the side, while settling down with a different human female? What if I decide to grow up and have a fairly normal romantic life with some other girl, staying in love with Lumina while making a separate life for myself since Lumina and I can never physically be together at this time?' I was shocked to hear her come up with the idea on her own, let alone presenting it to me as an option. It proves Lumina cares so much about me; she wants me to have the opportunity to be happy in both the two lives I shall receive; this Earth life, and her Altiri life.110Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡR6bCBXR74c
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The thing is, there's only one specific problem with her idea. "Lumina? I'm glad that you are even willing to make that offer, but my mind is already made up. I love you too much to ever think of being with another woman, no matter the context. I couldn't even imagine it Lumina! I can't bring myself to have any feelings for any other person like I do for you. Those feelings all belong to you now, and there's nothing you can do to stop that. I don't care how tough things get or how long I have to wait for our lives to improve. There will never be another Lumina... This is our life now!" I've never felt so sure about the words coming from myself, but I could tell Lumina was taking this news to heart.110Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKybr43W63z
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"Oh Reed..." She started crying slightly, fighting back tears of happiness while considering the weight of my resolve. She never wanted to ask me such a thing; it hurt her so much to make herself offer an alternative life to me, one where she wasn't my highest priority. She and I both knew how cursed our love is while we're so far apart, and it filled us with a bitter-sweet outlook on the future. "What am I going to do with you?"110Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3osHJSgMUQ
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"I don't know, but I'm going to plan out some stuff for us to do in the future. I want to spend more time with you this winter. All I have to do is figure out how."110Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYKAFoLn90u
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"You really love being with me, don't you?" Lumina already sounded certain, but she waited for me to confirm it anyway.110Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡF4ZA51wtng
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"More than anything in the world." I'm unsure about most things in life, but not when it comes to her. All I want to do, my very purpose and reason for living, is to devote as much time as I can with her, to make more magical moments between the two of us, through eternity.110Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJhLsXTxESi
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"In that case, I'm happy to help you with that." Lumina's mood soared to new heights, allowing me to feel the flood of her happiness through the semi-moderate connection strength. As soon as I felt how she did, I knew I made the right choice and said all the right words.110Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhqR2JszKQk
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"Now, back to that amazing sunset." This feeling we have now, lined up in front of the beautiful setting sun was our own magic, our special moment for a most romantic date. I already had been walking again many seconds before it, but I decided to change the music in my phone again, having it muted for some time now.110Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHiXQDAqQJR
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"It's really amazing... Hey? I noticed earlier that you were playing some kind of new music. I sounds weird, but..."110Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1Y2j0Jdu7e
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"That's orchestra music, or as some call, instrumental music." I've reached a new normal for all my musical choices, favoring mostly music with little to no lyrical involvement whatsoever, as most of it comes from free downloads or purchased video games. "As much as I enjoy some Altiri music, I need some of my own stuff every now and then." I quickly scrolled through my new Ipod touch, returning to the recently played soundtracks, and putting on the one she was apparently remembering. It's a beautiful song to get into during a sunset like this one. "This one is called 'New Bodhum Soundtrack', and it comes from a newer Final Fantasy game I got recently." Even with music like this, the meanings and associations I make with these songs have their own story, set in by my passive imagination rather than lyrics. Therefore, they can tell an infinite number of stories.110Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAzymm7g88o
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"I see... So that part of the purge must have worn off already, the part that makes your body feel like the music of our tribes was flowing through you as electricity."110Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqMT0URuflS
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"Yep, sure has." Lumina never knew the purge could invoke that kind of musical montrum, until I told her myself. The strange aspect to this was, even long after the purge had ended, some residual effects were still active inside me, like my montrums to certain things, or my occasional feminist side blasting through at random. Then again, maybe it's not the effects of the purge, but rather my brain wishing to engage in old patterns it got used to during the time. "I think it's been over for a while now. My taste in music has changed, but I don't think it's such a bad thing."110Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYbIFAi1mtd
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"Sorry about all the weirdness it caused you, but I'm glad to hear you're fully returning to your normal self. It's known that certain effects can linger long after the purge completion, including the physical changes."110Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6gJqIhL0WX
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"Physical changes?" I had to stop walking momentarily, as this was the first I'm hearing about this prospect. What physical changes is Lumina talking about? I never noticed anything specifically out of the ordinary from the purge. I didn't grow antennas out of my ears. I didn't gain any super powers or ice beam abilities. Last time I checked, I've been human the entire time.110Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ08CPMBYVjn
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"You know, your ability to lucid dream. You told me that it happened twice; once in a moment after the start of your purge, and then months after the end of the purge, in the form of lucid nightmares."110Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡborPaN4z46
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I hope Lumina doesn't scare me like that again. She and I have different definitions of what physical changes pertains to, but I certainly remember the lucid dreams. I told her all about those lucid nightmares I kept getting, about one Reba Sound trying to kill me endlessly, until I finally grew a pair and stood up to her bluff. The nightmares stopped right after that moment. Unfortunately, I've never been able to lucid dream since. "I remember that, but..." Was lucid dreaming really part of the purge? I've heard a lot about it from ordinary people and online communities, not that their methods had any merit to them.110Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpJaZraPwdH
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"But you don't have any more now, right?"110Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3MCfwlShyb
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"Come to think of it... Those types of dreams seemed to occur randomly. I can't just invoke lucid dreaming whenever I want. Are you sure that lucid dreaming is an exclusive aspect of the purge signal?"110Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡn6yXOyGNj4
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"I wouldn't say it's exclusive. But the purge does seem to heighten a person's ability to experience altered or higher states of consciousness for brief bursts of moments, sometimes even after the purge finishes and the two nodes connect. We know that lucid dreaming has something to do with psionic properties as a result of our current conclusions, but I'm afraid we don't know much more beyond that. Believe me, I am curious about it."110Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBdizQzXzAg
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No wonder I'm getting the scientific jumbo from her. I guess even Lumina is curious about many unexplained things too. "That's right! Altiri people don't even sleep, which means they can never dream about anything." I only just now put those two facts together. Lumina would be most interested about lucid dreams, since she's never had any dreams at all... I wonder what it's like to never sleep or dream.110Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHeXOkHduuL
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"That's right. And daydreaming just isn't the same. I'm sure of it."110Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡx7YUjNJxfY
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"Yeah." I took a moment to let my thoughts carry me away to the idea of it all. Daydreaming is surely no replacement for an actual dream, but that's mostly just because of the difference in possible immersion. I've never been able to activate my imagination strong enough to shut out the world around me 100%. I don't think anybody has. But if we could do that somehow, daydreaming would be another form of lucid dreaming, one where we're in control.110Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡb3Emq3VXER
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"But I was mostly interested in your story, regarding the fact that, in a ludic dream, you weren't actually able to control any aspects of data from within your dream for any period of time. The only thing you got to control was yourself, your body, and all of your conscious thoughts. Am I right?"110Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQD5gvaV7uH
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"Yeah, that just about sums it up. But why is that so interesting to the Altiri?"110Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNMnkB8Wo4N
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"Well you see, we've been getting a lot of earthbound rumors regarding the phenomena of self-proclaimed lucid dreamers. Our Scryers follow up on every potential breakthrough in any psionic related power happening without a purge, often with high hopes. These other lucid dreamers claim to be able to control every aspect of their own dreams from within, rather than just their own consciousness. It's been a most interesting concept to us all, but hearing your testimony to it changes everything. Well, it changes how I see it at least. The only person I believe on these abilities is you. And if you say it's impossible to control aspects and elements of your own lucid dream, then I personally have to conclude that the other self-proclaimed dreamers are not really telling the truth."110Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIEqAiAoF4h
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Is she trying to tell me that I'm her personal debunking tool for this? "Don't look to me for that Lumina. Who knows if the others are really doing that or not? I mean, there are some things that can be disproven on psionics, but lucid dreams are different. As far as I know, even you people don't have the power to look inside people's dreams, so it's not debunkable this way anyway, not beyond mere correlation. Maybe the others induce lucid dreaming on themselves simply by using some weird memory recall trick they do by mapping out what they want to dream before going to sleep, and having it actually happen. Whatever the case, it's entirely possible that I'm just uniquely unable to control the elements of my own dreams, no matter how conscious I am during one... But I had no idea that you were actually interested in all that stuff. I shouldn't be surprised though. It's not as if you ever sleep."110Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYOa5IBgAIV
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"Oh, well..." Without warning, Lumina sounded quite bashful, as if she let herself get far too carried away. "I mean, it's just a thought is all. I don't care about it that much..."110Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqqLYnCX9s7
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"Awh, what's this?" I taunted in a sadistic voice. "Are you too afraid that I might think you're a nerd?"110Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtpfyAgd1WL
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"Hey!"110Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJA3K2jmpuq
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I already started snickering, certain I was right. "It's okay Lumina. You can admit to me that you're a geek. I can take it."110Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiA2aWIfUTd
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"I'm not a nerd! You're a nerd!"110Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBdWJGTRwAU
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"Nice comeback."110Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCg4Uurh1Tf
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"I don't need a comeback!" With the cutest pout of defeat, Lumina folded her arms in as she stood against her steel wall. We both switched a little between using our minds and our voices to talk to each other, after it felt so natural to use either method. "Sheesh! You could at least try to have some manners."110Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJPXtZVQgIP
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"Whatever do you mean Lumina? I didn't think you would have considered my comment to be rude." I made sure to add the most sarcastic slur to my thoughts as possible, trying evermore to egg her on.110Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqybTWAzDkv
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"Sure you didn't."110Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDfdNzqgbl6
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"After all, I tend to find nerdy people hot and attractive. But if you insist that you're not a hot geek yourself, then what am I to do?"110Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLB1v4aliQt
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"Oh grow up you idiot!"110Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡv8O4JxQVWj
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I couldn't stop myself from laughing. So long as I knew we were just being playful, Lumina's aggressive side was something amazing for me to witness.110Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWrab9ehpTs
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"You think this is funny!"110Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQRzbo3dobJ
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"Wow! I thought I was the oblivious one... Yes, you thought I was insulting you, but I was really trying to give you a compliment."110Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHe0Clb6QzH
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"Oh yeah? Well how would you like it if I called you a nerd? Nerd!"110Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡogNytR1sOn
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It took everything inside me not to quiver from her voice. I don't have any idea why I loved hearing her so wound up, but I found myself enjoying every second of it. "Hm... Well it's interesting yeah? I think I quite like the compliment."110Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXDo4T2Q9Vy
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"It's not a compliment!"110Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSHWxbivRrM
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"I guess because it proves that I'm so smart now. You might think you can insult me by calling me a nerd, but it actually feels kind of right to be given that label. Plus, the nerd community would argue there's nothing wrong with being one."110Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡobr1OmeydJ
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"Why must you make this difficult and complicated?"110Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUN6GNNqCCW
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I laughed some more, ensuring my victory over her at last. In all the time I've known her, Lumina has gotten off on harmlessly humiliating me or laughing at certain social misfortunes I've had to endure. It's led to this unannounced roasting contest between each other, one that's been most fun. Until recently, it's been an uphill battle for me. Lumina is always smarter than me when trying to mess with my mind like this, but now the tables are turning at last. "Where's the fun if I don't make all of your insults three times less effective? You're going to have to step up your game."110Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHqMQyYgMFW
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"Just you wait Reed. One day, I'll outsmart you instead. We'll see who has the last laugh."110Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0ryekwNWf1
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Yeah, like that will ever happen.110Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXL5W5UUhNe
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"I can still hear you Reed! Telepathy? Duh!"110Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡo1TK5zcTQH
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"You're so cute when you're flustered..." Words couldn't describe how much fun I was having right now! This is pretty much what happens when Lumina and I run out of things to talk about. "Awh man! When did it get so dark out? You made me miss the view!"110Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZeTgPHTWyE
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"Well ha ha! I still had my fun."110Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡituJHPsYBf
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Didn't I just prevail though? Oh, never mind. I'll let her think she's won something. "In any case, I need to go home and shower."110Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuZrNPtBckx
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"Yeah, you probably smell like a sock after today."110Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHFy46GV9US
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"Probably." No arguments there.110Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwlxmst10Ek
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"But I guess you still have things to do. Even if you're stuck doing what little work you need to, I think I'm going to keep hanging out with you in the background, if that's okay?"110Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkYTZ7zyO0F
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"Fine by me." I knew from before that most of the single tasks I do, be it homework or book work - bore Lumina to death. If she's willing to hang out with me passively and wait until I free up some more time for ourselves, I'm not going to get in her way.110Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡufA0Tu0mHh
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