第五十九.五章709Please respect copyright.PENANAFb5Iq18rVe
709Please respect copyright.PENANA57L6C6ddcd
「何鵬侑,其實你對我仲有無感覺?」709Please respect copyright.PENANAlqF0eMg0o5
我終於都決定要問一次,這一個一直埋藏在我心底裡的問題。709Please respect copyright.PENANAaFmNen3E7K
709Please respect copyright.PENANACGfcOSo2oH
我已經拖延了Alvin不少時間了,他可是還要回去為姐姐買晚飯的。709Please respect copyright.PENANA8YaLGoMi8k
雖然心裡是這樣想著,但我還是把他從醫院帶來了車站,再由車站從帶到來了現在暫住的家樓下。709Please respect copyright.PENANAYtIT7Xpwfx
原因就只是希望能夠問道他這一條問題……709Please respect copyright.PENANAkKrOfS6rYr
709Please respect copyright.PENANA2QraIKZ82y
但當我問完後,只見Alvin思考了一會。709Please respect copyright.PENANAR0sqdyprQ9
拜託,你一定要回答「已經放下了我」。709Please respect copyright.PENANAIvntfllnt8
這樣我才能夠有藉口都讓自己放下你的……709Please respect copyright.PENANAvknVbc0m6W
709Please respect copyright.PENANASx9B8dPozF
「你要我老實答嘅話,喺仲有感覺。」他思考完後,就看著我說。709Please respect copyright.PENANA1zF7ixcRvN
聽到他這一個答案,我的大腦頓時如同電腦當了機一樣。709Please respect copyright.PENANAbLULWA6Lb3
他這個答案,完全打亂了我原先預定好要與他說的話……709Please respect copyright.PENANAApOGMXCNVV
709Please respect copyright.PENANAtZVsoLyXlH
我初初是希望他會回答我「已經放下了」。709Please respect copyright.PENANAqnBZOupnjU
然後我就可以順勢假裝自己都放下,並與他再一次由「朋友」的關係,重新再來一次。709Please respect copyright.PENANA2riOL3FCbw
但現在他竟然直接回答我「還有感覺」……709Please respect copyright.PENANAiF1FlY7fR4
709Please respect copyright.PENANALOXCpOGSna
單單就是這一句,就足夠令我已經很想立即走進他懷中,然後跟他說,其實我都一樣還沒有放下……709Please respect copyright.PENANANEgKS4ZkNq
雖然感性上,我真的想與他再一起。709Please respect copyright.PENANA3UO6bTiiBN
但理性上告訴了我,一開始令他失望及傷心的人……是我。709Please respect copyright.PENANAKs0Ei4DpKl
即使我知道一切都已經過去了……709Please respect copyright.PENANACkQom9mGYy
但是曾經的傷痕裂縫,是沒法輕易就能填補得到的。709Please respect copyright.PENANA6W7xLlxhUc
我或許已經沒有資格,在他的心裡再佔上一格。709Please respect copyright.PENANAg9nsUmKUWW
我更不能再在他的心裡刻上第二條傷痕……709Please respect copyright.PENANAjMeaC4MXOE
709Please respect copyright.PENANA9qnuyovwvg
但是這刻情緒已經有一點開始湧現出來。709Please respect copyright.PENANAA9Rn3FKOao
然而,我都一定要假裝冷靜,不能讓他看穿我此刻的情緒。709Please respect copyright.PENANAWApoO4gPO0
於是我便深呼吸了一下,然後說:「都過咗成年啦……點會仲有感覺架……」709Please respect copyright.PENANAudSRk6RwF4
我說著的時候,心裡其實都一陣隱隱作痛。709Please respect copyright.PENANAg0Y6bBTyyh
709Please respect copyright.PENANAEULXjMPDxO
「原先都無乜架啦,但同你相遇翻之後,個感覺即刻出翻哂嚟。」709Please respect copyright.PENANAu2vvhlaiNK
他回答著我。709Please respect copyright.PENANALRfEy7jr9H
為何你一定要說這些說話呢……709Please respect copyright.PENANArBg3vqh73Q
709Please respect copyright.PENANAou02ffwFIB
雖然心裡很難受,但我自己弄出來的問題,就必須由我自己來解決。709Please respect copyright.PENANAVY0Wonruzl
「問題就喺呢到啦!」我立即回應他。709Please respect copyright.PENANABifyu2aISB
而他都很快就看著我問:「問題?」709Please respect copyright.PENANAhAfo7xewWu
709Please respect copyright.PENANAukWf7m72PV
「我哋依家嘅身份仲喺前男女朋友,所以一見翻臉就自然會咩感覺都出翻哂嚟……明明大家都已經分咗手成年,但你仲喺好似move on唔到咁。」709Please respect copyright.PENANAxMshM0Ya02
我都不知道自己正在亂說著甚麼……但我說完後,就立即轉身背向著他。709Please respect copyright.PENANArBvOjqgdwD
因為我真的開始壓抑不住心中一直不斷湧現著的情緒了……709Please respect copyright.PENANAUdvxONpli8
每當我說一句與心相反的說話,我就變得更難受了。709Please respect copyright.PENANAC6AYKD2WAY
709Please respect copyright.PENANAnM4mo2extb
「你咁樣講,好似講到自己已經放低咗咁。」他又回應了我。709Please respect copyright.PENANAUA5pOezVLj
原來你認為我已經將你放下了嗎……709Please respect copyright.PENANAgjGGUYuTl8
雖然,心真的很痛,但既然已經決定了,我就必須繼續演下去。709Please respect copyright.PENANAD4HjFUqUHU
709Please respect copyright.PENANAaHRh2bcx1R
「我……放低咗架啦!」我說道。709Please respect copyright.PENANAPLzmT7uJJw
但這時候,淚水都終於壓抑不住,從雙眼開始流下來。709Please respect copyright.PENANAGaQ7UYrkQl
對不起……我撒謊了,但這都是為了你好。709Please respect copyright.PENANAE17N0zMnq8
709Please respect copyright.PENANAoFADKa3Agf
「喺啊……你放低到咪好囉……唔似我咁。」他回答我。709Please respect copyright.PENANA8yWRXRyTiz
拜託不要再說這些說話了……709Please respect copyright.PENANAFvB9i8eKyr
709Please respect copyright.PENANAhOCzcnbmiB
此刻,聽完他的說話後,我的心真很痛,很痛,很痛。709Please respect copyright.PENANA89XTzZ0H5T
但是我還得繼續演下去……709Please respect copyright.PENANAof99giCLfC
於是我強忍著眼淚,並轉身看著他。709Please respect copyright.PENANAI19P5rYYMM
709Please respect copyright.PENANAVwsQmZrVqs
幸好,這時旁邊的的路燈剛好因時限而熄滅了。709Please respect copyright.PENANAqAMquq4cYW
這麼暗的環境,他應該是看不到我的表情的……709Please respect copyright.PENANAaeMXWwEXhN
於是我便立即向他說道:「所以我覺得點解有時我哋喺班房到會有啲尷尬就喺因為我哋身份嘅問題。」709Please respect copyright.PENANAjCOZa6yK0n
句子之間完全沒有停頓,因為一停頓下來,我就會又想哭了。709Please respect copyright.PENANAcAUvzWBdSJ
709Please respect copyright.PENANAdn3TG1i2dL
「身份嘅問題?」他問道我。709Please respect copyright.PENANAoHhwarFcSN
「你仲覺得我喺你前女朋友,所以有時喺交流上先會有啲尷尬……你應該好似我咁放低哂,然後就以一個新嘅身份去面對你!」709Please respect copyright.PENANASTTnVIVJpy
我看似很有道理地說著。709Please respect copyright.PENANAX0pVQspMXW
但其實我根本就沒有放下過對他的感情。709Please respect copyright.PENANAfmy013dprj
709Please respect copyright.PENANASYvvjxULeg
接著,Alvin竟然沒有回應我。709Please respect copyright.PENANAU70xSNy3dI
於是我都只好繼續說:「不如我哋重新嚟過,唔喺曾經嘅戀人,唔喺前男女朋友,而喺重新由朋友呢個關係再開始過。」709Please respect copyright.PENANAgfy8vU0jI8
本來這一句說話,是打算一開始在他回答我「已經放下了」後,就接著說的。709Please respect copyright.PENANASjgsyExNba
709Please respect copyright.PENANAUhoxWZyMyR
709Please respect copyright.PENANAg8KJACxbJd
雖然我都希望我們能從「朋友」再重新開始過。709Please respect copyright.PENANAeTzA1tWGs7
但至少都讓我有一個藉口去先放下對你的感情吧……709Please respect copyright.PENANA2TVDD8bz0m
現在這樣反而讓我更不想去放下對你的感情了……709Please respect copyright.PENANA3ePMkv29kJ
709Please respect copyright.PENANASsFuqk3BMZ
「你嘅意思即喺我哋做翻朋友,好似啲典型嘅分手對白咁。」他又開口說道了。709Please respect copyright.PENANArqCbF0l1LI
「咁唔好咩?你又可以放低我,而我哋又可以繼續正正常常咁交流……」709Please respect copyright.PENANANXj6Zyl5wL
這對現在的我們來說,應該是最好的解決方法了。709Please respect copyright.PENANA4DhHxI8SUq
709Please respect copyright.PENANAxn4dl3FJgo
接著Alvin都沉默了一會,看來他都應該是在思考著這個唯一的解決方法。709Please respect copyright.PENANAVYeMj2iFQT
而很快,他都彷彿想通了一樣開口說:「好啦,我哋做翻朋友啦咁!由今日起,我哋就只喺朋友。」709Please respect copyright.PENANA6fisEDzzCN
709Please respect copyright.PENANAhWCisPIMt0
當我聽到他說我們只是朋友時,我就知道「何鵬侑與蔡霜玥」這段關係,在這一瞬間……完結了。709Please respect copyright.PENANASgwdj5EtqM
雖然這本來就是我的目的,但為何當我聽到他所說後,我反而更難過……709Please respect copyright.PENANAhgJhwDJzkz
709Please respect copyright.PENANAS7WV4eWFL7
我的眼淚又開始從雙眼流下。709Please respect copyright.PENANAURP62nqkAw
但現在與他這麼近的距離,他一定會看得見我臉上的淚水。709Please respect copyright.PENANAcDNHmQeycp
709Please respect copyright.PENANAsP9WEn7DqN
因此,我只好立即轉身,並強忍著淚水說:「好啦……時間唔早啦,你……快啲翻去買飯比家姐啦,我都要上翻去煮自己份晚餐啦!」709Please respect copyright.PENANADMj8WHTCpn
接著,我就背向著他揮手,並往前面的方向跑去。709Please respect copyright.PENANAdVPKZmyvAa
我必須離開他,因為我實在不能再忍耐下去了。709Please respect copyright.PENANAiIUpNt4Rha
再這樣下去,我一定會在他面前痛哭出來的……709Please respect copyright.PENANACELUOCM0CO
我不想他後悔。709Please respect copyright.PENANAk9QSwUjubx
709Please respect copyright.PENANASoKPbAOau6
我跑著的時候,並沒有理會身後的Alvin是站著還是轉身離開了。709Please respect copyright.PENANAPHTHhALnqu
淚水已經不斷從雙眼滲出,而我都只能加快腳步走回家中。709Please respect copyright.PENANA2ihQRHlqms
709Please respect copyright.PENANAgEnpryWBv7
接著,當我成功回到家,打開了門進到屋內,並閉上門的一剎那……709Please respect copyright.PENANAetl0cGEzvc
我直接跪在地上,大聲地哭起來……709Please respect copyright.PENANAv2RL5L05SH
對上一次,我會這樣大聲哭出來,應該是與Alvin提出分手後……709Please respect copyright.PENANAEzmNxBBKR5
709Please respect copyright.PENANAgoVZgUVkSb
「好痛,好痛,好痛……」我哭著的同時一直說著。709Please respect copyright.PENANATBZkO3rJFe
這一刻,並沒有任何人能在我身邊能夠安慰及陪伴著我。709Please respect copyright.PENANA6aizIpzbXX
而我都只能一直痛哭著,直到淚水流乾涸為止……709Please respect copyright.PENANAmhDJnFYHRL
709Please respect copyright.PENANAWSCH2h5Jiu
對不起,何鵬侑,是我親手摧毀了我們這一段感情的。709Please respect copyright.PENANAII7cqpkze9
過去你所認識的蔡霜玥,將不再存在。709Please respect copyright.PENANA6pU5zdljt7
而接下來的蔡霜玥,都只會與你以「朋友」的身份繼續相處。709Please respect copyright.PENANAlL7EugvQlZ