
天亮,上班。891Please respect copyright.PENANAwksMy1zFjt
891Please respect copyright.PENANAD7SYVUyljn
擠進人山人海的車廂,心竟是難得的平靜。看著人們專注把玩手中的電子玩物,我心中更覺異常的安全。畢竟,好不容易才能擺脫熟人的注意。891Please respect copyright.PENANArITmbQpMne
891Please respect copyright.PENANAuPp4toOcf7
車廂一如往常,平穩中帶輕微搖晃,教本已帶睡意的乘客更為昏昏欲睡。有些嘴饞的人不理會廣播的呼籲,繼續進食,令人側目。891Please respect copyright.PENANAjw7PczSKhj
891Please respect copyright.PENANAfxSZ4Z0djd
食物的細碎,像沙子一樣,在人們毫不注意的情況下,悄然掉在地上,再被無意地踏個粉碎。在接著的數個車站,人們再肆意加以踐踏,令碎粉再度粉碎。891Please respect copyright.PENANA0A3YfRf3bN
891Please respect copyright.PENANA6va49MKAMh
到站了,我有意無意地繞過人羣,「不經意」踏中那些有數隻小蟻的食物碎粉,心中是一陣少有的快意。幕門關上,我回頭望進車廂,想要看看被我蹂躪過的碎粉,但列車經已開駛。891Please respect copyright.PENANAWcK61nx6PJ
891Please respect copyright.PENANAqHFbYUVRQG
看不見,罷。
天黑,下班。891Please respect copyright.PENANAYW1kif6QI8
891Please respect copyright.PENANAP1djB5b2hD
身心俱疲。好不容易才與同路的男同事擠進車廂,繼續講上司的壞話。891Please respect copyright.PENANA1HLEqHNMBC
891Please respect copyright.PENANAHUGg9wMumN
「有蟻。」男同事突然指著快由我鞋面爬到小腿的一隻小螞蟻。891Please respect copyright.PENANAxjVXMVX6Dd
891Please respect copyright.PENANAdJ9IQczzZ3
我呆了。腦海中一片空白。不!有一個很遙遠的身影。那是誰?我看不見……我不想看見……891Please respect copyright.PENANAtYAqxONFEM
891Please respect copyright.PENANAmqfYP04ELV
「啪」的一聲,男同事一手拍在我的小腿上,那隻螞蟻——扁了。891Please respect copyright.PENANAvOarF7GXWN
891Please respect copyright.PENANA0sBd95RLND
「沒事了!」他笑了笑,問我:「你很怕小昆蟲?」891Please respect copyright.PENANATC7n1ryFGv
891Please respect copyright.PENANAOvTLXJxtgk
「不,只是怕蟻。」我感覺到,我的唇還在顫抖,但卻仍勉力一笑。
公司,午飯時間。891Please respect copyright.PENANAlWqKnWLmq1
891Please respect copyright.PENANASNErTIlEll
甲小姐正在上網看劇;乙先生在打盹;丙小姐外出吃飯去;丁先生仍在享用他那巨型飯盒;戊小姐……891Please respect copyright.PENANAVlfwJtgWQv
891Please respect copyright.PENANAfrsIPwGZm9
看著同事們的百態,我突然覺得自己和他們一樣,都是很渺小的生命體,小得……有點兒……像……螞蟻。這是我最不想要看到的事,尤其是發生在我自己身上。大家營役勞碌,不也是只為求兩餐溫飽嗎?那與盲目求存的螞蟻有何分別?891Please respect copyright.PENANA3KmFEDtEzB
891Please respect copyright.PENANAu6ayNH7cQs
驀地,我看見一隻螞蟻在我手背上路過,卻沒意識去按扁它。我把手輕輕放在枱面上,讓它自然而然的爬走。看著它在牆角消失,我感到自己也消失了似的。
其實,真正的我只是一隻螞蟻,不過會偶爾做白日夢,幻想自己變成人類,過著那荒唐無稽的生活。那種生活,是有目的的付出,有希望的付出。每天朝著那所謂的「希望」跑,多奢侈!無他,這就是意義。891Please respect copyright.PENANAAxrpaq24mj
891Please respect copyright.PENANAQlMfepTAXt
還是……891Please respect copyright.PENANANWHrTJVggL
891Please respect copyright.PENANAMtEkWgzjFR
其實,真正的我只是一個渺小的人類。不過會偶爾做白日夢,幻想自己是一隻蟻,過著那種沒頭沒腦的生活。那種生活很乏味,只懂一味尋找食物。無他,這就是生存!
公司,工作。891Please respect copyright.PENANApBJTAUzZJc
891Please respect copyright.PENANAp1EtkAJytt
被上司罵個狗血淋頭。891Please respect copyright.PENANAr5zIDilW5P
891Please respect copyright.PENANAnFX37oZABa
大家心知犯錯的不是我,奈何人是怕事的,只好把我推上斷頭台。事後,一句道歉或安慰也欠奉。891Please respect copyright.PENANAlWYusGjFVl
891Please respect copyright.PENANAmR7yEg3NUQ
很難過。我只好躲進廁格稍作自我冷靜。891Please respect copyright.PENANAQikDglBzHC
891Please respect copyright.PENANA0AwplroF3m
剛巧,一隻螞蟻經過廁格。我毫不猶豫一腳踏扁它。891Please respect copyright.PENANAjTu8ldKoWh
891Please respect copyright.PENANAem4mIv6un8
快意,笑了。
酒吧,喝酒。891Please respect copyright.PENANAFVTLMrtThx
891Please respect copyright.PENANAQcItQzIzAm
「你不是只怕螞蟻而已嗎?為何現在也怕酒起來?」男同事笑問。891Please respect copyright.PENANA0qBblpVfon
891Please respect copyright.PENANAMICmdq0jjH
「其實,我不大好喝酒。」我怯怯的道。891Please respect copyright.PENANAJwIAjCzz6F
891Please respect copyright.PENANAoG7QUoVALd
「還是……你根本不會喝酒?」他哈哈大笑。891Please respect copyright.PENANAPCv4jMvGJ4
891Please respect copyright.PENANAwh0OiylQHj
聽著他那豁然開朗開朗的笑聲,我突然變得不大抗拒,乾脆把小杯裡的酒一飲而盡。891Please respect copyright.PENANAM2HP3OeUU0
891Please respect copyright.PENANArQaT3LRAk2
醉倒。891Please respect copyright.PENANAodhP7b87eJ
891Please respect copyright.PENANAT1Rnpp8emE
迷糊間,我看見男同事以螞蟻姿態爬上我的身體,不停遊走於每吋肌膚。他似乎沒停下來的意欲,想要到它的洞穴去……891Please respect copyright.PENANADNBwINPocS
891Please respect copyright.PENANAnUq7ubBIPV
「上天取走你的一扇門,定會留給你一扇窗。」891Please respect copyright.PENANAcIaat0MN3v
891Please respect copyright.PENANAibkqP686NQ
今趟,上天留給我一隻螞蟻。我給其取名為「男朋友」。
假期,醫院。891Please respect copyright.PENANAQiyNsNAs8F
891Please respect copyright.PENANA7tQCLprOzL
媽就在這間醫院裡。她患了甚麼病,還未明確,因為報告要待下星期才會完成。891Please respect copyright.PENANAnsHgzFJJRY
891Please respect copyright.PENANAdbMT0n3wqH
看見媽的時候,家中各人都是淚眼漣漣,很憂心。這種氣氛令健壯的人也難免感到窒息。891Please respect copyright.PENANArtm1M8cLHP
891Please respect copyright.PENANAlpL1ONwzWB
「我覺得……」近幾天,媽的話都變得斷斷續續:「自己……」891Please respect copyright.PENANAWoyUrnDXsG
891Please respect copyright.PENANAvgEahhubjl
大家都屏息靜氣,深怕這是她的最後一句話。891Please respect copyright.PENANACTHGWWPA4k
891Please respect copyright.PENANAfQAL4OqE4l
「自己是……一隻螞蟻……」她的聲音,輕如柔絲,但我知道大家都聽得很清楚。891Please respect copyright.PENANAz0eOorDLIz
891Please respect copyright.PENANARBRYPto8eX
死寂。891Please respect copyright.PENANAGwVCNu1lnq
891Please respect copyright.PENANA04CeGcCjsH
出乎我意料,這竟是她講得最清楚的一句話,不論是肉體還是心靈上。
回家,晚飯。891Please respect copyright.PENANAhiUTLN6FIn
891Please respect copyright.PENANA0soeXzenfF
一枱六椅,異常的沉默。電視的聲浪,掩不住大家的咀嚼聲——大家口中的食物似乎比鋼鐵更硬。我裝作不以為意,繼續吃。891Please respect copyright.PENANAa4PZPWx3CH
891Please respect copyright.PENANAslD64DvZyZ
「很難吃。」爸突然放下筷子:「不如外出吃飯。」891Please respect copyright.PENANA7lMB2UnKhU
891Please respect copyright.PENANAc1WkBlY3VH
妹放下筷子衝進房內,甩門;姨低下頭來,但她盯著枱上菜餚的怒目卻仍清晰可見;婆呆了,眼眶紅潤;我默默望著對面牆身上一隻偶然經過的螞蟻。891Please respect copyright.PENANARXgiTYNjhB
891Please respect copyright.PENANAjieuR0GN9q
我心想:世界末日來臨後,地球會否只剩下這隻螞蟻?
每次望著媽,心中都生起莫名的感覺。我的腦海裡浮現出一隻螞蟻的模樣,彷彿她根本就是一隻螞蟻。891Please respect copyright.PENANAxMffqTZHNf
891Please respect copyright.PENANAo8XlFLfUQI
一隻螞蟻在做菜煮飯、洗衣拖地、燙衫抹窗……多可笑!就是因為她是一隻螞蟻,所以我從沒有幫忙做家務的念頭,去減輕她的負擔。891Please respect copyright.PENANALhy7xIkY2E
891Please respect copyright.PENANAHH8sYCMeu0
久而久之,我每次一見到她,便會掉頭走。891Please respect copyright.PENANAeYDXrgI6Wk
891Please respect copyright.PENANAscaasGbkxU
但我知道,我永沒能走遠。
男友家,床上。891Please respect copyright.PENANAmr4mw64Yht
891Please respect copyright.PENANA65l4Qo63a6
前奏後,男友進入極度興奮狀態,沒注意到我正在放空自己。在他還在我身上冒汗之時,我的思緒又飛往遙遠的他方去了——産房。891Please respect copyright.PENANAUFqqe1ySc1
891Please respect copyright.PENANAW1pCfRktE5
産房內有一張床,床上有一隻非常細小的蟻后。她痛得不得了,是産婦們口中的十級痛楚。那表示,她要生産了。不消一會,整張床上都是幼蟻,恐怖非常。但她的身體卻沒停止的意識。現在幼蟻已攻陷整個産房、整間醫院、整個世界。891Please respect copyright.PENANA6BWV1WW1ze
891Please respect copyright.PENANA8Znkpu6K44
我驚恐萬分之際,耳邊傳來蟻后的淒怨聲音:「他朝君體也相同!」891Please respect copyright.PENANA562hA0VBhL
891Please respect copyright.PENANAS0U4pjk4BZ
床上的我驚叫。男友以為我也感到興奮,於是更用力……
舊生聚會,內地某酒家。891Please respect copyright.PENANAnh0yD32fmJ
891Please respect copyright.PENANA0V48j2GFim
說也奇怪,舊生聚會竟會選擇在內地舉行。聽聞是聚會發起人的主意,說會給我們驚喜。891Please respect copyright.PENANA784JwcHWaP
891Please respect copyright.PENANAMhgHsVBG08
「蟻宴?」我呆了,但逃不了。891Please respect copyright.PENANAanEO0FbT8s
891Please respect copyright.PENANAelruC2fI8f
「你有收看《天與地》嗎?」舊生甲吃一口紅蟻炒蛋。891Please respect copyright.PENANAjOF54CAP6y
891Please respect copyright.PENANAEVumyCdRvW
「有。人吃人那幕很震撼!」乙滿口黑蟻殘肢。891Please respect copyright.PENANAPPs1VE41IZ
891Please respect copyright.PENANAxKERnwkoKO
「結局何如?」丙一口氣喝下半碗白蟻湯。891Please respect copyright.PENANAXSW6xpcd5g
891Please respect copyright.PENANA62CQTidHqn
「沒好下場!」丁邊說邊給我一碗黃蟻糖水。891Please respect copyright.PENANAtS6gDwm7OX
891Please respect copyright.PENANANnM3oIXQ7a
「對!沒好下場!」我在心裡重覆著,衝到洗手間嘔吐大作。
男友有很多恐怖的寵物:蛇、蜥蝪、蜘蛛……每次做愛時,他都會放一些寵物在床邊,以增加他的性趣。891Please respect copyright.PENANADsqniNn7zX
891Please respect copyright.PENANAas8T6UQ8zK
今趟,床邊竟無任何寵物的蹤影。我暗喜。完事後,我不經意的問道:「你的寵物呢?」891Please respect copyright.PENANAlfd2YZ1ajo
891Please respect copyright.PENANASiF3sJC96u
「在你體內。」891Please respect copyright.PENANA0DLKjX922a
891Please respect copyright.PENANAPVTtmA3sVW
「甚麼?」891Please respect copyright.PENANAMcD2OKcCjQ
891Please respect copyright.PENANAElVEaPhJMB
「蟻。」
有一隻螞蟻住在我心內。891Please respect copyright.PENANAKTppK5Yyut
891Please respect copyright.PENANAN99DYuHMpr
它平常會做甚麼?做菜煮飯、洗衣拖地、燙衫抹窗……嗯,它會做的事真的很多,但從沒理會過我的感受。它憑甚麼闖進我的心、我的生活!它最好立刻消失!891Please respect copyright.PENANA3EOh5nI6qZ
891Please respect copyright.PENANAmKF50X9oJf
結果,我生命中其中一隻螞蟻真的消失了。我依稀記得它的名字是「媽」。
靈堂上,我一再向來賓欠身鞠躬。891Please respect copyright.PENANAtbY7uGVkn6
891Please respect copyright.PENANAAveH9h0dRM
「她真的死了嗎?」某君的聲音傳到我耳邊,但我心知那不是靈堂裡的人。891Please respect copyright.PENANAnUwv4nGM1o
891Please respect copyright.PENANAzkQeTQkswf
「誰?」另一聲音反問。891Please respect copyright.PENANAfYA8wWSTPC
891Please respect copyright.PENANAIZwg3zLchy
「二九三號表妹。」某君不耐煩的道:「她……」891Please respect copyright.PENANAmqJJLTmHiI
891Please respect copyright.PENANA8Nz3d7AbWi
靜。891Please respect copyright.PENANAzcgpti5AAi
891Please respect copyright.PENANAfWv8SHaxM7
我回過神來,低頭一看——我剛不經意踏扁兩隻小蟻。
我:「我的耳朵有毛病嗎?為何會聽到螞蟻講話?」891Please respect copyright.PENANAvIaZVe23Lf
891Please respect copyright.PENANAmWrcxIwHWb
醫:「不。是你的壓力過大,導致有幻聽。」891Please respect copyright.PENANAdPRmcfMkJX
891Please respect copyright.PENANAsIuvMFFatJ
我:「我有精神病?」891Please respect copyright.PENANA1jHh1xK0DQ
891Please respect copyright.PENANAPNzd7ydY1i
醫:「是情緒病。」891Please respect copyright.PENANA54B9LpJeqY
891Please respect copyright.PENANA3OzdxRN3RS
我:「怎麼辦?」891Please respect copyright.PENANA5dsZ0JGdBx
891Please respect copyright.PENANABx9SAI4AjE
醫:「我會處方一些藥物,你要按時服用;另外,你也要多休息……」891Please respect copyright.PENANAhJEkVi5vfo
891Please respect copyright.PENANAGtbxOCWTCn
我:「謝謝醫生。」891Please respect copyright.PENANAQ2xesyuTHd
891Please respect copyright.PENANAZ9JOp6ZTpG
醫:「不用謝。」891Please respect copyright.PENANAIVtq590GTA
891Please respect copyright.PENANApvr5Qcsb4W
離開診所時,我回頭望一望地上的廣告牌——「馬義專科」。891Please respect copyright.PENANAVnbyzWOFdZ
891Please respect copyright.PENANAnCoHdPs9Lu
不,我走近細看,是「虫馬虫義」專科。
總覺得體內有東西在蠶食著我。是蟻?891Please respect copyright.PENANAiGcdQhnKqT
891Please respect copyright.PENANARHquk8Rzk1
醫生替我作身體檢查,一切正常;891Please respect copyright.PENANAEfGQiHz2zw
891Please respect copyright.PENANAkwU1UCUToy
男友向我解釋,螞蟻之說,純粹幽默;891Please respect copyright.PENANAuR2RNkK9SG
891Please respect copyright.PENANAyaOChm018f
同事都勸我休息,減少工作量;891Please respect copyright.PENANALwBSzLKwCx
891Please respect copyright.PENANAJ6n28mvrUo
……891Please respect copyright.PENANAY8qS387pIq
891Please respect copyright.PENANAZMp0p9qWO5
「真的有蟻在我體內!」我尖叫,奪門而出,從天台一躍而下,肝腦塗地。891Please respect copyright.PENANAgIAeNhuG4i
891Please respect copyright.PENANAImdwIe2JR4
臨死前,我看見那東西了——不是蟻,是……