
我在書枱前呆了大半日。熱茶已涼,但我未嚐半口,心思都在眼前電腦屏幕上——剛輸入的文字不停被刪。字越少,心越亂,人越躁。476Please respect copyright.PENANA7Mu64lUTjT
476Please respect copyright.PENANAHeNuiHDAAd
不了。受不了。我離座往廚房換茶去。476Please respect copyright.PENANA2Csx9KHs2v
476Please respect copyright.PENANAnjdjh77CvF
廳中老妻瞄我半眼,大概知道發生甚麼事,沒有作聲,繼續看電視。我對她的不表態不勝感激——她以最聰明的方法維護我的尊嚴。476Please respect copyright.PENANAhH6L2mmgi0
476Please respect copyright.PENANAXNKaRpe7Pb
滾水撞上茶葉,水仙香氣隨著冉升白煙溢散開去。476Please respect copyright.PENANAgkDWDqIIMr
476Please respect copyright.PENANA9PFyIdhLK1
壓力似乎一併消散。476Please respect copyright.PENANATriAdlMUaS
476Please respect copyright.PENANAoal540aghW
茶盡。我再續杯。476Please respect copyright.PENANA23OCQ5l8dL
476Please respect copyright.PENANA8jsSR71jQ1
添茶不是長遠之計——屏幕白頁上始終沒有片言隻字。476Please respect copyright.PENANAc9D84Js11O
476Please respect copyright.PENANAsGXtTTn3DC
嘆一口氣,慨嘆自己太天真可愛。怎麼會相信自己有寫作天分,而且一信就是幾十年。幾十年來,不停寫,不停發表,不停被無視。我只得不停安慰自己說旁人不識貨。476Please respect copyright.PENANAdFEFYT6WwL
476Please respect copyright.PENANAx1NRMxFOG7
口不對心。心裡其實清楚自己料子如何。但我還是堅持寫下去。476Please respect copyright.PENANAhe4XgNaJdc
476Please respect copyright.PENANAB5ShEW7YNN
是習慣、面子、尊嚴緣故,更是不想承認自己做了一個長達幾十年的白日夢。476Please respect copyright.PENANA6pYZo6SJbU
476Please respect copyright.PENANAhUvJ5a9pjl
夢醒一場空。476Please respect copyright.PENANAKkCIkf0Ppa
476Please respect copyright.PENANAhCIiX2L91I
我本平庸,無甚專長,唯獨寫作能力相對身邊友儕略高丁點。丁點而已,卻足以讓我樂透幾十年。476Please respect copyright.PENANAZlbBcROR9y
476Please respect copyright.PENANAaWbWgIORzB
工作不順利時,我會告訴自己——我的專長不在工作上,所以被罵亦是無可厚非;人際關係不如意時,我會告訴自己——如果世人只能用文字溝通,我該是表達能力最好的人;走倒運時,我會告訴自己——我正在為快要誕生的偉大作品累積靈感……476Please respect copyright.PENANAWXBOz5NweE
476Please respect copyright.PENANAMZ90skZ3W1
一切都是有意義的。如果我真有寫作天分的話。476Please respect copyright.PENANAS2nvcX9UWG
476Please respect copyright.PENANAea26ovRDgu
捧著熱茶回到座位。身在心在能力不在。476Please respect copyright.PENANAQeIMkHEK5J
476Please respect copyright.PENANA6KV33t7G4A
在刺眼的屏幕白頁前,我又嘆一口氣。476Please respect copyright.PENANAXnrOWRHdD4
476Please respect copyright.PENANAHQM3wwCed5
我不曾長大,仍是幾十年前那個我,沉浸在中文老師讚賞的我。同學們紛表羨慕我的寫作天份,請教我如何想出精彩故事、練出動人文筆。476Please respect copyright.PENANAHUlGLELUvb
476Please respect copyright.PENANAOiyP8LKTIF
我沾沾自喜。476Please respect copyright.PENANAMFDLHU3Nr1
476Please respect copyright.PENANAu8XCDo4F27
細心回想,我當時已覺竅門不在天分,而是努力。努力鑽研文字的運用,努力細味名著佳作當中的韻味,努力思考故事情節起伏,努力觀察分析人世百態……名副其實的將勤補拙。476Please respect copyright.PENANAWNaMR2gtY6
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但我沒有向同學們坦白。476Please respect copyright.PENANAf0G4M1KdaU
476Please respect copyright.PENANAG7bohA0Xqg
因為我喜歡被讚賞的感覺。476Please respect copyright.PENANAbEsdUVpyMH
476Please respect copyright.PENANAKzF8ITSfk3
努力,努力,努力。476Please respect copyright.PENANAaXqy8NEvkg
476Please respect copyright.PENANAdMRav6Koc0
我的寫作技巧與日俱增,亦在多個學屆寫作比賽中獲獎。476Please respect copyright.PENANAMGtO9KTuOZ
476Please respect copyright.PENANAXHjna1XwVc
我以為自己將來鐵定能夠成為作家。476Please respect copyright.PENANAbohWZlYrHo
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以為。476Please respect copyright.PENANAlNAbEUmE5n
476Please respect copyright.PENANAPMCh4UoJdj
告別校園後,我成為一個普通文職。普通收入,普通打扮,普通生活。476Please respect copyright.PENANA8rycLYIxqn
476Please respect copyright.PENANAfMTFXGBnYR
普通得輕易被取代。普通得難以承受。476Please respect copyright.PENANAvXYaLk6pxg
476Please respect copyright.PENANA4Qodjoj9dR
我不得不告訴自己我是多麼的有寫作天份!我是多麼的獨特!476Please respect copyright.PENANAWfcURQin5w
476Please respect copyright.PENANAuHfXlmjlcO
某夜下班回家,我泡了一壺水仙,乘著茶香全情投入寫作世界。沒有外物打擾,我的世界只有我。一切如願。那麼順心,那麼安寧,那麼快樂。476Please respect copyright.PENANAnlkeTgl7GB
476Please respect copyright.PENANAqVvrNF9sek
我的作品感動了我。476Please respect copyright.PENANAq4zhbk5mY0
476Please respect copyright.PENANASEV7xKsZPp
我希望藉此找到更多懂我的人。476Please respect copyright.PENANAQman77ULtB
476Please respect copyright.PENANAmgSbqoH6Tt
幾十年來,不停寫,不停發表,不停被無視。我的世界與真實世界不斷相互碰撞。面對無止境的打擊,我不曾問自己為何堅持。因為一旦心生此等疑問,變相在內心種下「自我質疑」的根苗,一發不可收拾。476Please respect copyright.PENANAmjOFGe9nEp
476Please respect copyright.PENANAcCQAtFWTDF
無法接受自己幾十年堅持建基於一個沒可能實現的夢想。476Please respect copyright.PENANAdV0rE0MeW9
476Please respect copyright.PENANAGETcHNR7fX
無法承受自己生來就是如此普通、平凡、平庸……476Please respect copyright.PENANAum7IIkVfSx
476Please respect copyright.PENANAjpbOrJfcw4
熱茶又涼了。476Please respect copyright.PENANA5mHlQ13pxN
476Please respect copyright.PENANAeEKKwF7STc
屏幕白頁上始終沒有片言隻字。476Please respect copyright.PENANAFVoqAGFmkz
476Please respect copyright.PENANASdy54E3a3x
老妻繼續以不表態維護我的尊嚴。476Please respect copyright.PENANAlWWH7IlwLn
476Please respect copyright.PENANA4HL4JGXiiL
我的作品只感動了我。476Please respect copyright.PENANAAJ3RBlIPfD
476Please respect copyright.PENANATm2XqS6nBb
因為我的感受只有我讀得懂。476Please respect copyright.PENANAi815sLkaEm