x
我在書枱前呆了大半日。熱茶已涼，但我未嚐半口，心思都在眼前電腦屏幕上——剛輸入的文字不停被刪。字越少，心越亂，人越躁。448Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSswSGlI5dj
448Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡADWK65COxr
不了。受不了。我離座往廚房換茶去。448Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcFsEB2vvHo
448Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxXRry6wGoV
廳中老妻瞄我半眼，大概知道發生甚麼事，沒有作聲，繼續看電視。我對她的不表態不勝感激——她以最聰明的方法維護我的尊嚴。448Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡv5NFd2JvCa
448Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuznnqIW3Ol
滾水撞上茶葉，水仙香氣隨著冉升白煙溢散開去。448Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQS0WXEOfo2
448Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡe0jZys86wM
壓力似乎一併消散。448Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡh5w7ambGIu
448Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbfqRLkO318
茶盡。我再續杯。448Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcJdl9gHqlJ
448Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMOttuhVxuM
添茶不是長遠之計——屏幕白頁上始終沒有片言隻字。448Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2DuB14HhaZ
448Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiQS3sz9kJW
嘆一口氣，慨嘆自己太天真可愛。怎麼會相信自己有寫作天分，而且一信就是幾十年。幾十年來，不停寫，不停發表，不停被無視。我只得不停安慰自己說旁人不識貨。448Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9N8dTToMU4
448Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkCEoPG6pkZ
口不對心。心裡其實清楚自己料子如何。但我還是堅持寫下去。448Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWtkORz5wku
448Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡP7dipykZLz
是習慣、面子、尊嚴緣故，更是不想承認自己做了一個長達幾十年的白日夢。448Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZ37t15UAsg
448Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkhkocqtbEb
夢醒一場空。448Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡX0ZIICkU1Y
448Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjVmMZxQ9gt
我本平庸，無甚專長，唯獨寫作能力相對身邊友儕略高丁點。丁點而已，卻足以讓我樂透幾十年。448Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKZDZ8WAxra
448Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7q802AGfsa
工作不順利時，我會告訴自己——我的專長不在工作上，所以被罵亦是無可厚非；人際關係不如意時，我會告訴自己——如果世人只能用文字溝通，我該是表達能力最好的人；走倒運時，我會告訴自己——我正在為快要誕生的偉大作品累積靈感……448Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrLbJYYuiSF
448Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeHxmSPPfQO
一切都是有意義的。如果我真有寫作天分的話。448Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVRcF9PJATw
448Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡf4FWBgiije
捧著熱茶回到座位。身在心在能力不在。448Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbn7Eu4HGcV
448Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFT3YtwZnN6
在刺眼的屏幕白頁前，我又嘆一口氣。448Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLLtEtRTva7
448Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ14NU2Pd9Eb
我不曾長大，仍是幾十年前那個我，沉浸在中文老師讚賞的我。同學們紛表羨慕我的寫作天份，請教我如何想出精彩故事、練出動人文筆。448Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpcZJlhlsTW
448Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIXLtoAufvK
我沾沾自喜。448Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmmSNd2EhbN
448Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoXa2pJhRvb
細心回想，我當時已覺竅門不在天分，而是努力。努力鑽研文字的運用，努力細味名著佳作當中的韻味，努力思考故事情節起伏，努力觀察分析人世百態……名副其實的將勤補拙。448Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8qAQGZMkNI
448Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxrL7xVbs5b
但我沒有向同學們坦白。448Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPtEMdxwIp7
448Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdw7QrsIJZe
因為我喜歡被讚賞的感覺。448Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfdVDEKAnBf
448Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlfPQ27YUwA
努力，努力，努力。448Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWJnwUA2ocs
448Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyHZwdIWG1O
我的寫作技巧與日俱增，亦在多個學屆寫作比賽中獲獎。448Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKJxDrlDL9a
448Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4aVtgaQIm9
我以為自己將來鐵定能夠成為作家。448Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaJ6i9oN9xS
448Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1IMp8puQ0H
以為。448Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUvPDDUItLo
448Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡG456pquNuW
告別校園後，我成為一個普通文職。普通收入，普通打扮，普通生活。448Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7atzQe0LY3
448Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡB7ONm7xiBK
普通得輕易被取代。普通得難以承受。448Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKgMU76Nd97
448Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ36JgI4frUU
我不得不告訴自己我是多麼的有寫作天份！我是多麼的獨特！448Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQV3mmNSoP5
448Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5r4mL8RQDz
某夜下班回家，我泡了一壺水仙，乘著茶香全情投入寫作世界。沒有外物打擾，我的世界只有我。一切如願。那麼順心，那麼安寧，那麼快樂。448Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9ScpPzRq8f
448Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiladsvV1dE
我的作品感動了我。448Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbtpPZ2Ih57
448Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNIvQikL41Z
我希望藉此找到更多懂我的人。448Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsbcNRtpHOQ
448Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsGc9TEUuw4
幾十年來，不停寫，不停發表，不停被無視。我的世界與真實世界不斷相互碰撞。面對無止境的打擊，我不曾問自己為何堅持。因為一旦心生此等疑問，變相在內心種下「自我質疑」的根苗，一發不可收拾。448Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiXD9GxTEbv
448Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKwETsSZzPW
無法接受自己幾十年堅持建基於一個沒可能實現的夢想。448Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNKtgFk2xbL
448Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnEvbSinhc1
無法承受自己生來就是如此普通、平凡、平庸……448Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8YShhSWwl0
448Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNfifG9FsCX
熱茶又涼了。448Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrRprAYiq87
448Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhQan9nMNu7
屏幕白頁上始終沒有片言隻字。448Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMPF2KOhbhp
448Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ521iJwaXc7
老妻繼續以不表態維護我的尊嚴。448Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeE13D0HDpB
448Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRNu74J4Jy7
我的作品只感動了我。448Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡm6oFKFjibB
448Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKONzZE2JUG
因為我的感受只有我讀得懂。448Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgHKLiUmn46
