
天亮,上班。890Please respect copyright.PENANAQJlEjffVoa
890Please respect copyright.PENANAhOyrj6rS4o
擠進人山人海的車廂,心竟是難得的平靜。看著人們專注把玩手中的電子玩物,我心中更覺異常的安全。畢竟,好不容易才能擺脫熟人的注意。890Please respect copyright.PENANA83Cy7mjur8
890Please respect copyright.PENANAfH5plGNGNh
車廂一如往常,平穩中帶輕微搖晃,教本已帶睡意的乘客更為昏昏欲睡。有些嘴饞的人不理會廣播的呼籲,繼續進食,令人側目。890Please respect copyright.PENANAOSz1uvu98P
890Please respect copyright.PENANA7VYewQxkSl
食物的細碎,像沙子一樣,在人們毫不注意的情況下,悄然掉在地上,再被無意地踏個粉碎。在接著的數個車站,人們再肆意加以踐踏,令碎粉再度粉碎。890Please respect copyright.PENANARw0NYF6YJA
890Please respect copyright.PENANA988aTOLx6v
到站了,我有意無意地繞過人羣,「不經意」踏中那些有數隻小蟻的食物碎粉,心中是一陣少有的快意。幕門關上,我回頭望進車廂,想要看看被我蹂躪過的碎粉,但列車經已開駛。890Please respect copyright.PENANA2Gopo2kOyo
890Please respect copyright.PENANAXUre8ecWaU
看不見,罷。
天黑,下班。890Please respect copyright.PENANAM2AQBqBTaO
890Please respect copyright.PENANAyp0UgiUJWq
身心俱疲。好不容易才與同路的男同事擠進車廂,繼續講上司的壞話。890Please respect copyright.PENANAlx0j65ncP3
890Please respect copyright.PENANAy8LTfMDZnO
「有蟻。」男同事突然指著快由我鞋面爬到小腿的一隻小螞蟻。890Please respect copyright.PENANAMBLC2YCyWm
890Please respect copyright.PENANA3M0AGUum5K
我呆了。腦海中一片空白。不!有一個很遙遠的身影。那是誰?我看不見……我不想看見……890Please respect copyright.PENANAwoJLmCp0Il
890Please respect copyright.PENANA2CkyWJpV30
「啪」的一聲,男同事一手拍在我的小腿上,那隻螞蟻——扁了。890Please respect copyright.PENANASI15pNFRmw
890Please respect copyright.PENANA0MsDSMFmkf
「沒事了!」他笑了笑,問我:「你很怕小昆蟲?」890Please respect copyright.PENANAS9aXTvbVCu
890Please respect copyright.PENANAYt5DQ1RK8m
「不,只是怕蟻。」我感覺到,我的唇還在顫抖,但卻仍勉力一笑。
公司,午飯時間。890Please respect copyright.PENANAi9WlBIacng
890Please respect copyright.PENANA8AM7dfdiKT
甲小姐正在上網看劇;乙先生在打盹;丙小姐外出吃飯去;丁先生仍在享用他那巨型飯盒;戊小姐……890Please respect copyright.PENANAjxCSxo4qn9
890Please respect copyright.PENANAXP0F2ZR75L
看著同事們的百態,我突然覺得自己和他們一樣,都是很渺小的生命體,小得……有點兒……像……螞蟻。這是我最不想要看到的事,尤其是發生在我自己身上。大家營役勞碌,不也是只為求兩餐溫飽嗎?那與盲目求存的螞蟻有何分別?890Please respect copyright.PENANAuzeNqqxPIP
890Please respect copyright.PENANAiBTHnyfRrz
驀地,我看見一隻螞蟻在我手背上路過,卻沒意識去按扁它。我把手輕輕放在枱面上,讓它自然而然的爬走。看著它在牆角消失,我感到自己也消失了似的。
其實,真正的我只是一隻螞蟻,不過會偶爾做白日夢,幻想自己變成人類,過著那荒唐無稽的生活。那種生活,是有目的的付出,有希望的付出。每天朝著那所謂的「希望」跑,多奢侈!無他,這就是意義。890Please respect copyright.PENANALI4vNOgi2C
890Please respect copyright.PENANAc3U1pkUMJw
還是……890Please respect copyright.PENANAOXz8TXxs0U
890Please respect copyright.PENANAKx7Byg52yg
其實,真正的我只是一個渺小的人類。不過會偶爾做白日夢,幻想自己是一隻蟻,過著那種沒頭沒腦的生活。那種生活很乏味,只懂一味尋找食物。無他,這就是生存!
公司,工作。890Please respect copyright.PENANAjO7QA8W0Ov
890Please respect copyright.PENANA0LJyRibc6K
被上司罵個狗血淋頭。890Please respect copyright.PENANAGs8mACGDNM
890Please respect copyright.PENANA1sz5Tt9UX6
大家心知犯錯的不是我,奈何人是怕事的,只好把我推上斷頭台。事後,一句道歉或安慰也欠奉。890Please respect copyright.PENANApkyJebxyeS
890Please respect copyright.PENANAqQJniOTtPl
很難過。我只好躲進廁格稍作自我冷靜。890Please respect copyright.PENANA10wMn8saP7
890Please respect copyright.PENANAmulNOEiKl7
剛巧,一隻螞蟻經過廁格。我毫不猶豫一腳踏扁它。890Please respect copyright.PENANAZLIRBFH7qq
890Please respect copyright.PENANAFCV70Bled9
快意,笑了。
酒吧,喝酒。890Please respect copyright.PENANAKT7Or6esD7
890Please respect copyright.PENANAwKBnDG2tZu
「你不是只怕螞蟻而已嗎?為何現在也怕酒起來?」男同事笑問。890Please respect copyright.PENANAnZ7FcpRoLz
890Please respect copyright.PENANAy4UcijeEoy
「其實,我不大好喝酒。」我怯怯的道。890Please respect copyright.PENANA5D0YOeztZo
890Please respect copyright.PENANAGVDLrc53Bo
「還是……你根本不會喝酒?」他哈哈大笑。890Please respect copyright.PENANAi61BrGBZlN
890Please respect copyright.PENANA9LukSc6uMV
聽著他那豁然開朗開朗的笑聲,我突然變得不大抗拒,乾脆把小杯裡的酒一飲而盡。890Please respect copyright.PENANA6N7GQsYeAW
890Please respect copyright.PENANA1vTiYfUYnr
醉倒。890Please respect copyright.PENANAA1SGe9diJg
890Please respect copyright.PENANAaLkGFnaRf9
迷糊間,我看見男同事以螞蟻姿態爬上我的身體,不停遊走於每吋肌膚。他似乎沒停下來的意欲,想要到它的洞穴去……890Please respect copyright.PENANAVhl58BOwCk
890Please respect copyright.PENANAg2tTd9iSS7
「上天取走你的一扇門,定會留給你一扇窗。」890Please respect copyright.PENANAzsmKnqg6dQ
890Please respect copyright.PENANA05na8mY2ZT
今趟,上天留給我一隻螞蟻。我給其取名為「男朋友」。
假期,醫院。890Please respect copyright.PENANA9LX2Uq0cjU
890Please respect copyright.PENANA82hG1ndbuN
媽就在這間醫院裡。她患了甚麼病,還未明確,因為報告要待下星期才會完成。890Please respect copyright.PENANAj1cEzj2pEF
890Please respect copyright.PENANASybK2qMICt
看見媽的時候,家中各人都是淚眼漣漣,很憂心。這種氣氛令健壯的人也難免感到窒息。890Please respect copyright.PENANAy7Zy2Okc2A
890Please respect copyright.PENANAG5VHX3zn8X
「我覺得……」近幾天,媽的話都變得斷斷續續:「自己……」890Please respect copyright.PENANAVKv4BuUUi3
890Please respect copyright.PENANAz9oKb4Yoex
大家都屏息靜氣,深怕這是她的最後一句話。890Please respect copyright.PENANALV6QIHjr3H
890Please respect copyright.PENANAmH30ZkKD9N
「自己是……一隻螞蟻……」她的聲音,輕如柔絲,但我知道大家都聽得很清楚。890Please respect copyright.PENANAjsUO2x6lpW
890Please respect copyright.PENANAe0lhgOfuJk
死寂。890Please respect copyright.PENANAvstIgijrrG
890Please respect copyright.PENANAd0gBQPByjo
出乎我意料,這竟是她講得最清楚的一句話,不論是肉體還是心靈上。
回家,晚飯。890Please respect copyright.PENANAW6Yd449izQ
890Please respect copyright.PENANAmEkj1BaorO
一枱六椅,異常的沉默。電視的聲浪,掩不住大家的咀嚼聲——大家口中的食物似乎比鋼鐵更硬。我裝作不以為意,繼續吃。890Please respect copyright.PENANAUWTQx0Mtny
890Please respect copyright.PENANAFncWHFAdlL
「很難吃。」爸突然放下筷子:「不如外出吃飯。」890Please respect copyright.PENANAiSE4FyUCqv
890Please respect copyright.PENANAVhFVw8HSBa
妹放下筷子衝進房內,甩門;姨低下頭來,但她盯著枱上菜餚的怒目卻仍清晰可見;婆呆了,眼眶紅潤;我默默望著對面牆身上一隻偶然經過的螞蟻。890Please respect copyright.PENANAaO0oCXZm9q
890Please respect copyright.PENANAay4iXYVDkS
我心想:世界末日來臨後,地球會否只剩下這隻螞蟻?
每次望著媽,心中都生起莫名的感覺。我的腦海裡浮現出一隻螞蟻的模樣,彷彿她根本就是一隻螞蟻。890Please respect copyright.PENANALHfhOQkTe4
890Please respect copyright.PENANAB1yPWzSH8s
一隻螞蟻在做菜煮飯、洗衣拖地、燙衫抹窗……多可笑!就是因為她是一隻螞蟻,所以我從沒有幫忙做家務的念頭,去減輕她的負擔。890Please respect copyright.PENANAa52DQxpRRX
890Please respect copyright.PENANAh64oaFzlae
久而久之,我每次一見到她,便會掉頭走。890Please respect copyright.PENANAb7whKlfYav
890Please respect copyright.PENANAhFHMjysbdZ
但我知道,我永沒能走遠。
男友家,床上。890Please respect copyright.PENANASdvLZHpmKb
890Please respect copyright.PENANAt5IGq6ynrP
前奏後,男友進入極度興奮狀態,沒注意到我正在放空自己。在他還在我身上冒汗之時,我的思緒又飛往遙遠的他方去了——産房。890Please respect copyright.PENANAz4ruXTV9Ix
890Please respect copyright.PENANAsuEcnPccT5
産房內有一張床,床上有一隻非常細小的蟻后。她痛得不得了,是産婦們口中的十級痛楚。那表示,她要生産了。不消一會,整張床上都是幼蟻,恐怖非常。但她的身體卻沒停止的意識。現在幼蟻已攻陷整個産房、整間醫院、整個世界。890Please respect copyright.PENANAj6kwA32dLf
890Please respect copyright.PENANANjerFCNudF
我驚恐萬分之際,耳邊傳來蟻后的淒怨聲音:「他朝君體也相同!」890Please respect copyright.PENANAFoQKi5PM0x
890Please respect copyright.PENANABMpkysRafE
床上的我驚叫。男友以為我也感到興奮,於是更用力……
舊生聚會,內地某酒家。890Please respect copyright.PENANA0Ej4Wb3EFt
890Please respect copyright.PENANAFNBcp0SyRh
說也奇怪,舊生聚會竟會選擇在內地舉行。聽聞是聚會發起人的主意,說會給我們驚喜。890Please respect copyright.PENANAv3iVfuHRdx
890Please respect copyright.PENANAjomExP4X5e
「蟻宴?」我呆了,但逃不了。890Please respect copyright.PENANA9AVYbpcTTU
890Please respect copyright.PENANA2OUTL1RSS7
「你有收看《天與地》嗎?」舊生甲吃一口紅蟻炒蛋。890Please respect copyright.PENANAwu3TirUcm4
890Please respect copyright.PENANARwqk6kZ57W
「有。人吃人那幕很震撼!」乙滿口黑蟻殘肢。890Please respect copyright.PENANAVnzDbKvyOy
890Please respect copyright.PENANA0t3wQmfFNt
「結局何如?」丙一口氣喝下半碗白蟻湯。890Please respect copyright.PENANAWVjSiTO17b
890Please respect copyright.PENANAQalsRPOuCj
「沒好下場!」丁邊說邊給我一碗黃蟻糖水。890Please respect copyright.PENANAxl7mT4r95W
890Please respect copyright.PENANAnayINsbAme
「對!沒好下場!」我在心裡重覆著,衝到洗手間嘔吐大作。
男友有很多恐怖的寵物:蛇、蜥蝪、蜘蛛……每次做愛時,他都會放一些寵物在床邊,以增加他的性趣。890Please respect copyright.PENANAGzaioakBn3
890Please respect copyright.PENANAG8ipsQRNMT
今趟,床邊竟無任何寵物的蹤影。我暗喜。完事後,我不經意的問道:「你的寵物呢?」890Please respect copyright.PENANAtHpN9LQ23U
890Please respect copyright.PENANAR0PhDte6LO
「在你體內。」890Please respect copyright.PENANAlOQj0Ed7CP
890Please respect copyright.PENANAzGg5KRS6Jw
「甚麼?」890Please respect copyright.PENANA6DhTqMTkoQ
890Please respect copyright.PENANAImmgmq4PdO
「蟻。」
有一隻螞蟻住在我心內。890Please respect copyright.PENANAEPuwtXgoYo
890Please respect copyright.PENANAggR5ORxw1a
它平常會做甚麼?做菜煮飯、洗衣拖地、燙衫抹窗……嗯,它會做的事真的很多,但從沒理會過我的感受。它憑甚麼闖進我的心、我的生活!它最好立刻消失!890Please respect copyright.PENANAJNzVdU3tfb
890Please respect copyright.PENANA6g8NxQlmuw
結果,我生命中其中一隻螞蟻真的消失了。我依稀記得它的名字是「媽」。
靈堂上,我一再向來賓欠身鞠躬。890Please respect copyright.PENANARMuZf33dHB
890Please respect copyright.PENANAsH3QRidaJY
「她真的死了嗎?」某君的聲音傳到我耳邊,但我心知那不是靈堂裡的人。890Please respect copyright.PENANAIZl3wctL9b
890Please respect copyright.PENANAJuZGu8woLr
「誰?」另一聲音反問。890Please respect copyright.PENANACeUBpSdMOJ
890Please respect copyright.PENANAX5TDXJzUOk
「二九三號表妹。」某君不耐煩的道:「她……」890Please respect copyright.PENANARfnccghYJN
890Please respect copyright.PENANABE4gBpWjG2
靜。890Please respect copyright.PENANA0BIjZrfqN8
890Please respect copyright.PENANANqHrFSL5mw
我回過神來,低頭一看——我剛不經意踏扁兩隻小蟻。
我:「我的耳朵有毛病嗎?為何會聽到螞蟻講話?」890Please respect copyright.PENANA1N3n1NQ2vd
890Please respect copyright.PENANAOUpydNv3OB
醫:「不。是你的壓力過大,導致有幻聽。」890Please respect copyright.PENANAy2QiQs0yxa
890Please respect copyright.PENANAdsmGZqnYB3
我:「我有精神病?」890Please respect copyright.PENANAbQBKvyfKxN
890Please respect copyright.PENANAiSMqONfy72
醫:「是情緒病。」890Please respect copyright.PENANACk0BBuEkNF
890Please respect copyright.PENANA8uDfi76ton
我:「怎麼辦?」890Please respect copyright.PENANAxGMfGtIBvd
890Please respect copyright.PENANA8Hou1Apneu
醫:「我會處方一些藥物,你要按時服用;另外,你也要多休息……」890Please respect copyright.PENANAVhIaORmAX9
890Please respect copyright.PENANAmdMWaspAZs
我:「謝謝醫生。」890Please respect copyright.PENANAFhED5JHk7I
890Please respect copyright.PENANARGJbzuxrmH
醫:「不用謝。」890Please respect copyright.PENANAf6stkOUdl9
890Please respect copyright.PENANA3AguloaVrI
離開診所時,我回頭望一望地上的廣告牌——「馬義專科」。890Please respect copyright.PENANAdTuhg4MbaZ
890Please respect copyright.PENANA17x0Z0PZ2d
不,我走近細看,是「虫馬虫義」專科。
總覺得體內有東西在蠶食著我。是蟻?890Please respect copyright.PENANAUesP20Mu9I
890Please respect copyright.PENANAIqtjsVnYyo
醫生替我作身體檢查,一切正常;890Please respect copyright.PENANAXKyxf5jDNZ
890Please respect copyright.PENANAyXwCISQ4D3
男友向我解釋,螞蟻之說,純粹幽默;890Please respect copyright.PENANA80hEwKL5AO
890Please respect copyright.PENANAsh5OfGkKZ0
同事都勸我休息,減少工作量;890Please respect copyright.PENANAkUtqZBtZf4
890Please respect copyright.PENANAUV4cKV8x6T
……890Please respect copyright.PENANAmypV7czzyM
890Please respect copyright.PENANAomQ12GZGJT
「真的有蟻在我體內!」我尖叫,奪門而出,從天台一躍而下,肝腦塗地。890Please respect copyright.PENANAAfOUUUDP8K
890Please respect copyright.PENANAE2gIftfuMJ
臨死前,我看見那東西了——不是蟻,是……